<DarbySniper> My mother got a digital camera today. She wanted
to know how many pictures it could take before she replaced
the film in the memory card.

SignorMartinelli: how is the weather?
vacapalida: Dunno. I'm in a room with no windows.
vacapalida: My widget says it's 84 and sunny.
vacapalida: ...trust the widget...

<lark> shit dude im in deep shit with my gf
<Solid_Snake> What'd you do this time?
<lark> well her doctor was rude to her and I found it
hilarious
<Solid_Snake> Brilliant.
<lark> hes like this young new doctor and she went in for some
shit I dont remember and hes like "well  I got a prescription
for you. you could just take my..capsule" motioning to his
dick
<lark> she rolled her eyes and then he said "its a
suppository"

<JohnFlux> There are two kinds of people: 1) those who start
arrays with one and 1) those who start them with zero.

<@Canis> i wanted to move my nintendo once but didnt want to
lose my game
<@Canis> so i wired on a second power cord
<@Canis> and then walked it from outlet to outlet
<@Canis> im really lucky i didnt hit two circuits out of phase
<@Canis> that would have SUCKED

<wicked> They are playing multiplayer in GTA SA
***FatCat has joined the room (#hih)
<wicked> my brother is a stripper and his tits are hanging out
<FatCat> older or younger?

<darkdread> Three Middle Eastern Men Found With 1000 Cell
Phones...
<videogameaholic> you just used middle eastern and cell in the
same sentence.  answer the door, it's the fbi.

<jumpcho15> I foind out how to write a code
<KevinJB> you must be like a prmgerz or somfing

<roddyboy> man it sucks...
<roddyboy> phone got stolen tonight :(
<drjazz> call someone who cares
<drjazz> oh wait

<bTm> I swear to God, if you ever say that to me again, I will
remove each and every one of your limbs, including your tiny
penis, with a rusty spoon, shove your bleeding stumps into
buckets of rock salt, then force you to eat your way out of a
hole filled with your own feces and body parts.
<Xeonspire> Er. All I said was, "Hi".

< Cillian> WTF is ubuntu christian edition!?!??
< Cillian> It's not like normal ubuntu is spawn of the devil
<@BlackRatchet> thou shalt not kill -9?

<Ulm> Sigh. I've lost my cow.
<Ulm> I think she's learned to open her gate and she's gone.
<Ulm> Been looking for about 5 hours now.
<dal-X> Need more cowbell.

<siddy> stupid internet
<mutley> whats up with it? works fine for me :|
<siddy> its slow as hell
<siddy> im going to call them up and ask for it to be
restarted
<mutley> the internet?
<siddy> yeh...

Ben174: fuckin paypal.. they need new databases or something..
seems like every other day i get an email and have to go
update my account information.

<tydel> this fat chick walked up to me at the club tonight
<tydel> she's like "I like vodka, buy me a drink"
<tydel> I was like "I like blowjobs, buy ME a drink"
<tydel> kind of a conversation ender

Metl_AtWork: "Whatever comes out of the resolution must
address the root cause," Bush said
Metl_AtWork: I love bush quotes.
Metl_AtWork: he makes me feel smart when I read them.
Metl_AtWork: hes like the John Madden of politics =D

<Kojo> Nobody wants to star in my Star Wars porn video :(
<Kojo> The truth behind the scenes:
<Kojo> "Han Shot First"

<iMP> my friend just told me a horrible story
<iMP> so, he came to a shop on his bike and left it at the
entrance
<iMP> he was inside the shop only for about 5 minutes
<iMP> when he came out, the bike was still there, but
obviously something was wrong
<iMP> taking a close look, he noticed the absense of pedals.
<iMP> the country where people steal things they don't need at
all just out of boredom has no future :(

<jesusghet> ok IE sucks
<jesusghet> it doesnt support google calendar
<shaan> it does support spyware though

<VsX> i had a great idea for a t-shirt, but part of it is
trademarked
<VsX> the front will say "hear no evil, see no evil, speak no
evil...."
<VsX> and the back will say "but touch and taste it ALL YOU
WANT"

<Blarrrg> so my CD drive stopped working a couple days ago
<Blarrrg> i figured it must have just been the drivers
<Blarrrg> i looked around but couldn't find any, so i emailed
the company requesting them
<Blarrrg> today i go to check my mail, and guess what i find
<Blarrrg> they mailed me a CD with them

<Animule> OOkkaayy......
<Animule> HHooww  ddoo  yyoouu  ttuurrnn  ooffff  llooccaall 
eecchhoo  iinn  tthhiiss  tthhiinngg??????

<TheFlibble>Windows XP doesn't like admitting it's made a
mistake
<TheFlibble>It doesn't give error messages it just tries to
carry on regardless
<TheFlibble>Its like an embarrassed old man sitting in a pool
of his own piss.

Nautilus724: One time I tried to piss off the people at
McDonalds by ordering the food in the little Spanish I knew.
Nautilus724: I think that was the first time they didn't screw
up my order.

<scalar> ok, UPS guy came, now I can shower :P
<Keneto> famous phrases to remember not to take out of
context?

(%neeley_09) chain letters aren't even trying anymore
(%neeley_09) "You are definately going to die tonight."
(%neeley_09) "So repost this before you do!"

<+Ne0v001> I was playing Halo 2 yesterday
<+Ne0v001> my friend was over
<+Ne0v001> and I perfectly jumped 3 obstacles
<+Ne0v001> clicked on my invisibility
<+Ne0v001> and slipped by all the guards
<+Ne0v001> and mumbled
<+Ne0v001> "I don't play this game too much"
<+Ne0v001> and he was like
<+Ne0v001> "Who are you trying to convince? Me or you?"

<Tyranu[work]> tried to have a customer complaint about a
mouse that only worked to the sides and not up and down....
found out later that he didn't move the mouse forward/
backwards but rather lifted it up and down... a part of me
died that day

(&Gsus) thanks to asian porn i know now the japanese words for
"More" "oh god yes" "fuck me hard" and "get that tentacle out
of my ass"

<matt1020> is any 1 smart in hear?

<Chalk> i got a new hard drive and i thought it was fucked cos
there was a really weird noise coming from it
<LocK> heh, that sucks
<Chalk> then i realsied there was a crow at my windoe
<Chalk> going raaaaaaaaw
<Chalk> stupid crow

* %James|AFK kicks Cruise in the balls..... WAKE UP >.<
<foamy> hah
<bootsector> LOL
<bootsector> What a nice way to wake someone up!
<SilentDragz> I've woken up before with my 9 year old cousin's
face about an inch away from mine
<SilentDragz> wait
<SilentDragz> my face, not balls
<SilentDragz> that sounded so wrong
<%James|AFK> lmao
<foamy> freek

<LocK> I had a conversation about my penis with 2 girls
yesterday
<ezmac> must have been a short conversation...
<ophelia> If they're pointing and laughing, it's not a
conversation

mintgreenfaerie: rice or ice cream?
OmIn0uS DaRkNeSs: rice cream.
mintgreenfaerie: hehe, sounds like something from Scooby-doo
OmIn0uS DaRkNeSs: no
OmIn0uS DaRkNeSs: that would be
OmIn0uS DaRkNeSs: rice ream
OmIn0uS DaRkNeSs: which sounds like the name for some sick
asian porno.

<mETRo> you shoulda taken it back to walmart lol
<mETRo> they take anything back
<zx2ms> dude serisouly I was read to just throw it away and
buy a new one
<zx2ms> instead of go through the hassle
<mETRo> you could bring in a box of used rubbers there
<mETRo> and theyd be like "was there anything wrong with them?
"
<[xENo]> just set the kid on the counter
<zx2ms> lol

<Keimu> guys
<Keimu> come on lemme back in lol
<Calendros> sorry
<Calendros> You're still banned
<Calendros> come back later
* Keimu (Keimu@ZiRC-A4D4B0A.hsd1.il.comcast.net) has left #
AY.Radio

<tokenshi> does anyone seriously use realplayer anymore?
<mef> yes
<Freddie> I thought they died :o
<RvLeshrac> They're doing extraordinarily well
<tokenshi> i believe i still have an audio clip buffering from
1999 in realplayer

<Osiris_69> we cant be a couple because she wont agree to oral
sex before mariage
<Osiris_69> catholic chinese, who is the ass who converted
them? im gona kill those fuckers
<AntiZzZ> i dated one of em
<AntiZzZ> she never gave it up in like 8 months
<AntiZzZ> she was rich tho
<Poppet-> damn
<Poppet-> 8 months
<Osiris_69> on the 9th month anti?
<AntiZzZ> we broke up
<_hit> she had a black baby

neeley_09: I just realized that I'm kind of a rarity on IRC...
diablo: What do you mean?
neeley_09: Well, I actually play aports sometimes, and I do
things with people, except in real life
diablo: Hey, not everyone on IRC is a geek
neeley_09: What's the biggest thing you've done today?
diablo: I played Oblivion for a few hours, I guess
neeley_09: ....
neeley_09: You can't even lie about it?

renol07: yo whats up
renol07: yo what up
renol07: what happen yo click
wryterra: "what happen yo click"? what the hell is that?
wryterra: I'm afraid I don't speak moron.

A[S]Vicious: Dude.. I fell asleep last night when I was
talking to my girlfriend on the phone.. She was masturbating
to my voice, and started talking about how her big vibrator
was stuck, and she couldn't get it out.
A[S]Vicious: And I fell asleep..
A[S]Vicious: It was awesome

* Fragalot moo's loudly at Naib
<Naib> *BANG*
* Naib goes to have steak

<cloud1> if warez is too expensive for you, maybe the internet
isnt a wise investment for you either

<Cob`Onsite> unfortunately when i leave here, i must go to a
church with a 90 year old secretary
<Ridgey_wtf> church? what's that?
<ragtop> its similar to a mental hospital, but with less
physical restraints

RonilWazlib: man that sucked
RonilWazlib: if your girlfriend tells you she feels fat and
hugs you for moral support, do not start jiggling her butt in
an attempt to find the natural frequency of fat
RonilWazlib: and if she asks, DO NOT tell her what you are
doing

<PhantomSkyfire> I was practicing with crutches and broke my
leg.

Jefferson: FOR SOME REASON MY PASSWORD ON HOTMAIL WON WORK
Mymuffinfatty: do you have caps lock on?
Jefferson: oh
Jefferson: nevermind.

<Epic> how are^things?
<Epic> I've been up 48 hours now ;_;
<Dr_Ian> is that why you typoed the space bar as shift and 6?

<D1_> in third grade
<D1_> I saw this girl have a seizure and spasm on the floor
<D1_> and man did her tongue go down her throat
<D1_> now that I think of it
<D1_> it was kind of sexy
<twin> what the FUCK

Chris: I hate the way flash slows browsers down
Steve: Try java, that slows it down much better