<jonathans> this fettucine is so thick i thought for a second
i was eating noodles and semen
<jonathans> its not very salty, though

<The_Veteran> remember the reason you are an op DaMo
<Damo> coz I gave head
<The_Veteran> yes!
<The_Veteran> he admits it

<Deke> hrm
<Deke> thats scary
<Deke> that hot korean chic from the world cup
<Deke> was a man
<|WaR|> i knew it!!!!
<|WaR|> i kept telling ppl...the neck dammit

<Sku||Fuck> her favorite author is irvine welsh and her favorite band is dying
fetus.
<Sku||Fuck> i don't know.  typically i'm drawn to the type of person that
easily accepts the subject matter in that sort of music.
<rdgzt> The subject matter being
DEATHSATANDISMEMBERMENTNIHILISMDESTROYKILLEVERYONEDARKNESSENTROPYDEATHEMPTINESS!!!!!
you mean?
<rdgzt> And perhaps some violent fucking.
<Sku||Fuck> dude you listed death twice
<rdgzt> Well, there seems to be a lot of it.

<countzero> chubbyken: how chubby are you?..
<markanoid> he's not chubby anymore, he's been working out..
havent you read?
<aander> i heard somewhere that his name isnt ken either
<uprightmonkey> i also read that he isnt even gay!
<aander> upright, now dont be silly. do you believe everything
you read?
<uprightmonkey> true true, aander. my bad.

* Kuibi[Minakos-Guardian] gets down on one knee
<Kuibi[Minakos-Guardian]> Minako, will you marry me?
<Minako> umm ahhh well, we should get to know each other more
first before that
<Minako> and and and....umm

<`Tenshi> ass munch.
<ibutsu> yes, I do on occaision

<Baledood> fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffftggggtfggggff
<Baledood> oops
<Baledood> sorry, was fishing a crumb from under the F key

<Weirdo> Sooty just brought a mouse into my room
<Weirdo> brb
*** Weirdo is now known as Weirdo|F00d

Silent4042: What's another name for child molestation?
SocialistNinja: Divine intervention?
Silent4042: What?
SocialistNinja: That's what my priest tells me.

Ps3000: what are you doing tomorrow at 3:45?
SocialistNinja: waking up

<RtWh0> garlic ok you and me right here right now
* GaRlic_iv puts up his dukes
* GaRlic_iv ... wait.. i got fuckin no dukes
* RtWh0 pulls out ding dong and swings it around like a whip
and cuts Garlics head off
<RtWh0> then some guy yells FATALITY
<RtWh0> in a mean vioce
<GaRlic_iv> RtWh0 pulls out ding dong
<GaRlic_iv> i hope thats not your dogs name dude

<setuid_w00t> KT: and you act like you're six
<KT> setuid_w00t: how else is a 21 yr old supposed to act
like?!
<setuid_w00t> don't ask me, I'm only 20

<azrael69> <----retarded
<madman`> true---^
<FlipMo> azrael69: pics plz

<tipz> just remember kids
<tipz> hippos eat strawberry ice cream
<thadood> I'll keep that in mind next time I visit your mom.

<I am Budwin>I found the meaning of life. . . And I can
download it too!!!
<Revica4000>. . . . . . .

<shagman> and here I go rollerblading in black jeans and a
dark blue t-shirt
<shagman> it must be 40 out
<SourKey> your nuts
<shagman> yeah, they're hot too

<kel> she's not great looking
<kel> has looked better
<kel> but has a funny nose
<kel> thin and wear tight clothes
<kel> hrm
<kel> I'm talking about 17 year old girl
<kel> I'm gonna stop

<oreth> ever thing to yourself "Hey, it might be fun to go
fuck a turkey?"
<AshPlississkin> no
<oreth> yeah.   me neither.

<McManus-wrk> how 'bout a pr0n site?  you'd get tons of hits 
:)
<manual_overide> McManus-wrk: LOL
<McManus-wrk> :D
<KT> when the page loads up the page should say "kiddie pr0n
is uncool! you should be ashamed of yourself! your IP has been
logged and sent to the nearest law enforcement agency"
<McManus-wrk> and then CLICK HERE for kiddie pr0n...

<[RCS]MrBojangles-nub> well if i wanted an 8" black penis in
my ass id commit a felony

<clubransom> I want my isp to block this 900 number stuff.

<jenn> BUKKAKE!
<DogBoy> ouch
<Asmodean> bukkake? isn't that the japanese rope tying fetish?
<DogBoy> no
<prefect> you're so young and innocent, asmodean
<DogBoy> lol
<Asmodean> young.. maybe.. innocent.. no :)
<DogBoy> hmm
<DogBoy> I can't even spell that
<DogBoy> I'm gonna ask my mom what it means
<Asmodean> bukkake?
<Asmodean> oh my
<Asmodean> hitting "i am feeling lucky" in google for bukkake
was umm.. *sooo* not work friendly

<billyblacktop> yo yo yo, sup my niggas?
<jimmy2toes>  your not black
<billyblacktop>  how do you know that?
<jimmy2toes>  I hacked your webcam, and now I can see you
<billyblacktop>  yeah right you cant do that
<jimmy2toes> I can and I did.
<billyblacktop>  ok then what color hair do I have
<jimmy2toes> Hmmm, let me zoom in a bit. Blonde, and you are
white, about 6' 2", your room has an emenim poster and your
bedspread is yellow and blue.
<billyblacktop>  holy fuck man im telling the cops
Quits: {billyblacktop} (billyb@235.253.473.232) (Quit:)
<jimmy2toes>  LMAO, that was a friend of mine, I just set up
his comp today, and showed him mirc, he doesnt know my nick,
what a fat tool!!!
<nellcarterlookalike>  A fat tool indeed.

<Roberto> My friend Mark said that he saw a ninja totally
uppercut some kid just because the kid opened a window.

<@E-vangelist> are asian masturbation jokes shorter?

ywedig: so what do you have planned this weekend?
GnaaaGnaa: I am going to kill your mother, rape your father,
cut off his penis and put it in your dead mother's mouth
GnaaaGnaa: then I'm going to see Spiderman

<Cole`> I think there might have been a guy at my ptq who
crapped his pants. During round 5 I had a bunch of people
watching my match and all of a sudden I caught the scent of
crap. I yelled out "Who in God's name shit their pants?!" A
few people laughed, but I didn't catch the shitter. So round 6
I am playing this guy and he smelled...like shit. I did in
fact recall him saying he wanted to go home and take a bath. I
felt really horrible for this.

<Pest> i was talking to a gurl at school
<Pest> her name was nicole
<Koen> heh :)
<Pest> she was like how are you doing today
<Pest> i went
<Pest> well im alright..but id be better if someone named
nicole was slobbing my knob
<Koen> rofl
<Koen> :(
<Pest> she smacked me
<Pest> :/

** Moses is now known as Cain....
<Cain> oh no I killed my bro ....
<KeeperS> ....
<KeeperS> what a stirring rendition of the bible ....
* KeeperS is moved to tears

<MercyBeat04> linux command prompts are like dos on acid with
a credit card out on the town. You can do anything.

<gh5046> Witness the amazing power of and ice-cold lemon lime
soda as I pour it on my crotch and become sexually aroused!

<t_h_e_o-> why do u use a period at the end of every sentence?
<dager> ROFL
<dager> BECAUSE
<dager> ITS A FUCKING SENTENCE

<CraNKGod> YOU KNOW WHAT'LL BE NEAT ABOUT LIVING ON MY OWN
<Funk> Being able to run up and down the hallway naked but for
a sock on your erect penis?
<CraNKGod> BEING ABLE TO DRINK STRAIGHT OUT OF THE MILK JUG
<Funk> Oh.
<Funk> Man, you need a better imagination.

<[0FXTCJ|U> are you excited now?!?!?!
<[0FX|nw> yeah
<[0FXTCJ|U> do you have an erection?!
<[0FX|nw> no
<[0FX|nw> hmm
<[0FX|nw> ¨cant say this in english
<[0FX|nw> i tooked my hand on my cock and drew forwards and
backwards
<[0FX|nw> what do u call it?
<[0FXTCJ|U> jacking off?
<[0FX|nw> oh
<[0FX|nw> in sweden we call it runka

<WoHo> jacob I have the highest grades in english in mah class
:[
<WoHo> my only prob is that I facken write in class like I
write on irc
<WoHo> my teachers comes up to me and asks
<Nold> rofl
<WoHo> wats ppl ?
<WoHo> wats r ?
<Nold> lol
<WoHo> wats mah ?
<WoHo> dude
<Nold> lolu
<WoHo> its bad :[

<NoahSoft> wizdom: Where?
<wizdom> UK :p
<NoahSoft> Is that in australia?

<davester> alright, in a month when i'm building this
computer, everything will have changed, so i'm not going to
bother now
<davester> they'll have gforce9's and p5's and terrabit hdd's
<davester> all for cheap
<Deathblend> and 256bit athlons
<davester> word
<davester> WORD
<Deathblend> you mean dword

<KagoniKnight>: You know how sometimes a dog humps your leg?
<Pong-Chan>: .....
<KagoniKnight>: Well, sometimes, why not hump back and show
who's boss!!

<noah> no I need a way to come to terms with the fact that I
wasted
<noah> my horny years whacking off to porn instead of bagging
college
<noah> tail
<dr.adam> might i suggest bourbon

<mb> everytime i've seen Iron Chef they always use sweet fish
<yesyouam> what's sweet fish?
<mb> the meat is supposed to be really sweet
<mb> and the guts are supposed to be bitter
<yesyouam> like ma wimminz

<yesyouam> marijuana and unix permissions don't mix

<yesyouam> Never let drugs stand in the way of alcohol

<Clitlover> I am not into that.
<Clitlover> How about roleplay?
<Nikki21[woaHOTTY]> ok
<Nikki21[woaHOTTY]> i'll be the dungeon master

<zamros> WHEN I WAS LIKE SEVEN I SAW A CAR GET RUN OVER BY A
CAR
<zamros> MY FIRST CAR ACCIDENT WITNESSING
<zamros> AND/OR MONSTER TRUCK RALLY

<@SpamapS> he was just a complete asshole to me last night...
and then was talking shit about it after I left
<@Redb3ard> dude, i didnt see it haappen
<@SpamapS> I was arguing with him that ReiserFS was better for
directory lookups, because it used b-trees to store meta
data...
<@SpamapS> so he's like .. "Do you even know what a b-tree is?
" ... I told him to kiss my ass...
<@SpamapS> He says "I have my algorithms and data structures
book here... so tell me what a b-tree is"...
<@Redb3ard> um
<@Redb3ard> you do realize, that this finalizes your geekhood
<@SpamapS> At which point, I told him I didn't need this crap
anymore and went to bed...
<@Redb3ard> there is no turning back, its irreversible, ta
this late stage

<Johnny-5> i just measured my dick and i was like 'yay ten
inches' then i realised i was looking at centimeters. life can
be so hard sometimes.

<Aatakinty> afk, im supposed to be sleeping, and i hear my mom
walkin around

<Logan> I have to say that sex ruined pornography for me. I
discovered that women don't scream, "Fuck me you big-cocked
cowboy!" when you touch their elbow.

<AkumaUsagi> because every scoobie doo episode could have been
1 minute long if only someone would have eventually bought a
gun.