< Danelope> I know what I need.
< Danelope> I need the cool shoeshine.
<@harb> Shoeshine?
<@harb> wt?
<@harb> If that has a double meaning, sign me up.

<Hoju> have you seen this?  http://www.somethingawful.com/
jeffk/
<Steve> think all those typos are on purpose?
<Hoju> .....

<@|nsid3r> this thing is puking on me

<cX> I LIKE BLOOD TRICKLING FROM MY PLANK SHAPED RECTUM
<cX> THATS WHAT I LIKE
<cX> CUZ IM A MERICAN
<cX> FROM MERICA

<SoulEdge> You are a fucker!!! A nasty fucked damn sucked,
lesbian gay transsexual pedophile dighead!!! AND U ARE NOT
GOING TO KICK OR BAN ME OUT!!! I'M LEAVING MY SELF!!! GET A
LIFE!!! GET A NICE ATTITUDE!!! FUCK U!!! MAKE FRIENDS, IF U
CAN, SILLY LITTLE NERD!!! d:-(

<PuyoDead> gahaha, I'm watching some porn live cam, and the
girl is just sitting there eating doughnuts

<DarkMyst> Where do Babies come from? The woman or the man????
<OlEnglish> the stork
<OlEnglish> but who fucks the stork?
<DarkMyst> good question

<Sterring> please , I don't really understand english
expression cause I'm not so good in english....
<Sterring> use simple words
<Nickname> you stupid

<Oldboy> mt dew shrinks your cock
<MiNdPhuCk> Tell me that again as I slam my 12 inch long, 4
inch wide cock down your throat while drinking a dew
<Oldboy> plastic doesnt count

<Ickarus> no one could disguise themselves as me, they'd never
pull of my buckets of charisma
<Cloud> Richie - you misspelt "Sarcasm"

<Funk> Hey I have a question for your mother
<zuKi> Sure thing, let me get her!
<Funk> Ask her how many Communion wafers you'd have to eat to
consume a whole Jesus

<dodge> oh shit, i got icecream on my keyboard
<dodge> shit, now chocolate
<dodge> i should clean it instead of mashing it under the keys

<_ENiGMA_> Fuckin telstra
<_ENiGMA_> They ring you up, and dont say who the fuck they
are and expect you to know they are telstra
<_ENiGMA_> "Hi its sheryl here from the paramatta faults
center, have you had any problems since the 26th?" ... "Umm
well yeah, I've been constapated a few times and seem to wake
up with erections... but aside from that Im fine"

<Zanshin> Ignitor: you have to be on malt liquor to fully
appreciate it. To the average american negro, slightly buzzed
on malt liquor and dazed by the media stimulus of sports and
bigscreen TV.. The phone, and the ability to communicate, even
in the typical monosyllables of the subculture, is a complete
novelty. Thus, the "wazzup" commercial represents the wonder
and happiness that a group of young negroes finds in using the
technology

<AJK> puff da magic hard drive lived near drive B: sorta near
the power sply in a tower owned by me

* C|3avag3 has quit IRC (Quit: Wh0 Am |? U sure u wanna know?
If somebody told u i was just your average ordinary guy, not a
care in the world, somebody lied! This is my gift! It is my
curse! Who am |? |'m Spider-Man!!!)
<Seaker> And lamest quit message of the day goes to C|3avag3
* Att|tude^ has quit IRC (Quit: I can't go on, I know not what
to do, My heart is worn, I feel as If I'm through, Please
believe in me. 'Cause what I need is for you.... To believe in
me.)
<Seaker> Woah, tough competition today ... I think today we'll
have to call it a draw.
* Love-snack has quit IRC (Quit: Quit playing games with my
heart cause baby you're breaking my heart , I LOVE YOU FOREVER
XXX)
<Seaker> *DING DING* WE HAVE A WINNER!!

<Fishfood> HAHAH
<Fishfood> BT ARGUING WITH AOL
<Fishfood> ITS LIKE BLIND FIGHTING THE BLIND!
<Funk> WITH THE RETARDED COMMENTATING

<\`es> fuck i just downloaded 5 crazytown mp3's. What the fuck
is happening with me

<sacarna> jay z - it's a hard knock life (ghetto anthem).mp3
<sacarna> otherwise its just a song from annie.
<JtHM> heh.. hardcore rappers mackin out to samples from an
old musical full of 10 year old white girls.
<JtHM> seems more like R Kellys scene

<Stuntman21> "Boys. Boys. Be My Boy! I want to feel your Body!
Boys. Boys. Be My Boy! Do Not Be Afraid My Honey! Boys. Boys.
Be My Boy! I want to be your lover girl! Be My Lover Boy!" I
like this song. Does that make me gay?

<moira> o
<AnimeFreak> my new keyboard has improved my typing skills
<AnimeFreak> too bad other keyboards suck compared to this
keyboard
<moira> is it an ergonomic microsoft keyboard
<AnimeFreak> no
<AnimeFreak> ibm model m
<moira> sry ergonomic is best
<AnimeFreak> no
<AnimeFreak> model m > *
<jre> FUCKS SAKE, ARE THEY FORGETTING TO INSTALL SHIFT KEYS ON
THE NEW KEYBOARDS?!?@!

Vrex989: know wonder you failed english

<barkode> yeah, slap can tell you about how at work he's
sitting there on the
web and coding perl, while there's gunplay in the lobby and a
bomb scare. We're not even kidding.
<slap> it's all true except the perl.

<felix> we're gonna start a band called "rsync", right?
<felix> OH BABY YOUR FILES ARE CHANGING BUT NO
MATTER HOW HARD I TRY I CAN'T KEEP UP, SO I'M REARRANGING AND
TRYING CVSUP, BUT IT'S JUST NO GOOD.  SO I SIT DOWN AND
THINK....
THEN YOU COME THROUGH FOR ME AND GIVE ME RSYNC

<@KelPearl> sleeps comes after sex
<@KelPearl> gotta get tired ya know
<@mootlif3> goto sleep while having sex
<@mootlif3> it'll make dave thing he sucks
<@mootlif3> and he'll buy you stuff
<@KelPearl> whoa
<@KelPearl> sweet idea

<BriTnEy77> wait why cant i see anything the video like froze?
<CatsyTECH> Refresh your browser.
<BriTnEy77> how do i do that?
<CatsyTECH> I'm sorry, but you have failed the IQ test for
this chat room.

<phr0id> anyone have e-txr2.001?, im on 56k
<juntog> that's like asking "anyone want to have sex? I have
aids!"

<Cyberllam> today has been about nothing but good news
<Cyberllam> earlier i found out that I was pregnant with twins
<juntog> are they mine?
<HaLLowCat> they better not be
<Cyberllam> no, but they can be, for the low, low price of 3
low payments of 29.95 each

<kethepoo> i remember the first time windows said "this
program has performed an illegal operation and will be shut
down", and i was worried that they found out about the porn i
had looked at

<StarlinVF> My mom watched me play Tribes2
<StarlinVF> she thinks I should go into the FBI

<mrkikass> i mean if she took her pants off im sure id get
plenty of energy real quick but other than that i didnt feel
like it

<Fro> i thought you had 24/7 support
<@TEKnoFLVA> yes but that doesn't mean you can use it 24/7

<D|S-Alias> my balls are in such gay positions
<D|S-Alias> they are all on one side in a cluster
<D|S-random> i fuckin hate that
<D|S-random> when they stick to ur leg
<D|S-random> ER
<D|S-random> i just wanna rip them off
<D|S-Alias> im talking about pool yo

<Amanda`> I need to find out whether my ISP supports modem
bonding
<maff> that's plain desperation

<Laura_ken> ameeeerrrrr
<amer> why do people do that
<amer> why can't you do "amer: this is my question blah blah
blah?"
<amer> why do you have to wait for a response
<Rhayde> lol
<amer> goddamit i'm here, ask your question
<amer> or say what you have to say
<amer> jesus
* amer throws up his hands and leaves the room
<amer> well?
*** Exekiel (ZelementZ@192.168.100.101) has joined #lineage
<Exekiel> AMER
<amer> lol

<+TlMMAH> hey gary
<+TlMMAH> what is porno that i should download
<+TlMMAH> i am putting my dick into your hands here
<+TlMMAH> not literally but, you know

<@harb> Also, the waitress at Applebee's thought we were gay.
< espo> LOL
< espo> why is that?
<@harb> Because Andy's a fag.
< espo> did she say "Are you two gay?"
<@harb> No.
<@harb> She asked if we wanted to split dessert.

<jonathans> i can stand on the sides of my ankles
<jonathans> both heels inward
<jonathans> i can balance on one for a bit
<clay> i can touch my penis with my hands

<ryano> i ain't drank dick for shit in months
<reston> try a lemondrop bodyshot
<reston> get some fly bitch and rub sugar on her tummy... lick
it, take a shot of vodka
<reston> and then eat a lemon
<jonathans> is that some kind of homosexual alternative to
tequila shots
<reston> yea jon
<reston> but its good
<jonathans> sugar instead of salt
<jonathans> lemon instead of lime
<jonathans> a chick instead of your hand
<jonathans> its beginning to make sense to me.

<lasthero> i own a lot of cds
<lasthero> and i own a kick ass stereo too
<lasthero> but don't own speackers, they cost so much

<Whooey> females jeans pockets are TINY
<Whooey> TTIIIIIIIIIINY
<Natasha> yes, they are
<amit> Whooey: females have a big flesh pocket to compensate

<Spankle> What the fuck is a furniture cover?
<Al> Spankle: a sheet you put over chairs and shit to stop
dust or dirt getting on them
<Al> like a foreskin for your sofa.
<Jre-La> And retracts when guests come by

<jim_the_hat> without programmers you would not be able to
chat on irc 15 hours a day ally^ :P
<ally^> i know
<ally^> i could be doing something else
<ally^> like sucking dick

TallyHoTheZebra: i love fire
TallyHoTheZebra: if i could have sex with it, i would

<Justice-P-> africa totally ruins that picture; the stripes
make it stand out too much
<Icehawk|work> j: that's south america and north america
<Justice-P-> whatever

<Cross> I was at the kareoke bar last night
<Cross> and i was talking to this hot chick for like 20
minutes
<Cross> and this other girl walked over right in the middle of
my conversation
<Cross> and said "Are you talking to my sister? Cause she's
deaf"

<mgt> i can't find any good porn anymore tho
<mgt> i like reading stories now
<mgt> it gets my imagination going
<mgt> the trick is getting yourself to actually believe they
are true
<mgt> and not written by some fat horny star trek fan

<Uzzie> i'm sueing herbal essences
<Uzzie> i didn't get orgasms

Nazrag is away now to play Tea Fortress Classic
<Nazrag> thats right kids, Tea Fortress Classic
<TheRiff> sweetened or unsweetened
<Nazrag> sweetened, with crumpets on the side
<TheRiff> alright

<Cyc66> http://cgi.ebay.ca/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=****
<Cyc66> plz ruin that auction
<bbz_> what do i want to do that for?
<Cyc66> she's a dirty whore
<bbz> maybe i could get her phone number
<Cyc66> uh why would u do that
<bbz> well, if she is a dirty whore