<denshuu> I just spent the better part of four fuck hours
trying to get on IRC from campus
<denshuu> just to talk to you artards
<Desu|Away> rawsome
<whereisJ> What would you do without us?
<denshuu> graduate

<SyntaxError> So how do you guys think Bush is doing
<Pacster> Don't get me started ...
<Merrick178> I'm sick of people hating Bush
<Pacster> Omg -.-
<Merrick178> He's doing pretty good for a retarded person

<BillyBob> napolean was 5 feet 7
<BillyBob> that i did not know
<NobleArc> Napoleon
<NobleArc> It's just francais. Spelling en francais isn't that
hard.
<BillyBob> good to know you can catch typos in multiple
languages
<BillyBob> almost as helpful as the microsoft office paperclip

<CimmAway> Spam subject of the day: "Proven Safe! Give Your
Little Brother 3-Inches Longer With This High Demaning Herbal
Pill tlet"
<CimmAway> Something just sounds wrong there...
<CimmAway> Giving 3 inches more to your brother...
<Reddman> he's getting better at taking it

[ %Nakedkira ] HERE'S A REAL CATGIRL
[ %Nakedkira ] :D)333-<
( +DB ) o.o
( +Renoki ) 3 sets... of boobs?
[ %Nakedkira ] meow, bitch

<Fuzion> research has shown that men are less likely to
attempt suicide, but more likely to succeed.
<Kadaj>  it's because they tend to use guns, while women use
things like sleeping pills.
<Fuzion> that just pisses me off.
<Fuzion> the last thing you are ever going to do... would it
kill you to do it right?!
<Fuzion> ...
<Fuzion> wait

Maybe_Factor: C++ doesn't have a compiler, it has a
complainer.

<muse06> you ever think god gets stoned?
<humphrey> have you ever seen a platypus?

Archpo: Ok, I m stealing that.
Drmn: haha
*** Auto-response from Archpo: rm * /dev/bladder; cat /dev/
fridge | grep food
Drmn: trouble with that is remembering to treat /dev/fridge as
a FIFO and not a block device
Drmn: *contemplates 3 day old pizza vs. 2 day old indian food*

<nyetwerk> why is it that they always make the stupidest
person on a project team be the leader?
<DocRadium> what are you in charge of now?

<mav> I've always wanted to change my legal name to ;DROP
DATABASE; and see what kind of havoc ensues...

<D4> Want to hear my idea for a Star Wars porno?
<Jolyon> Only if Han shoots first

DeathDread26: Ever consider lifting a lawnmower up and using
it like a weapon against a horde of people?
NiNj4 4Ss4SsiN: no
DeathDread26: oh
DeathDread26: so... i am the only one?
NiNj4 4Ss4SsiN: lol i guess
DeathDread26: damn.  know any good psychologists?

<Stevie_Kilroy> a little s&m never hurt anyone
<Bungalow Bill> dude
<Bungalow Bill> Yes it did.

<Mikachu> haha, i misread a japanese word i wanted to look up
<Mikachu> it was kansha, meaning "thanks, gratitude"
<Mikachu> but i wrote in gansha in the dictionary program
<Mikachu> "ejaculation onto partner's face"
<Mikachu> that is a mispronunciation i will be careful to
avoid

<pecosdave> Yeah, Snakes on a Plane not a movie you can enjoy
alone.
<pecosdave> You can admit to watching the movie with a group,
but watching it alone shows signs of having issues.
<jpaganel> LOL
<pecosdave> It's like Rocky Horror.  Watching it alone of the
privacy of your own home makes you weird.
<pecosdave> Cross dressing and watching it with a crowd on the
other hand is perfect acceptable.

<ricebowl> lingerie is one of the few items where you expect
to pay more for less

<Etir> I want to see Clinton versus Rice in 2008 just to see
if a 3rd party candidate can win on the "I'm Male" platform

<sigafoo> your girlfriend is so slutty she gets pass 'by
reference'
<HdxEvil> &owned

<irzyxel> RANDY !
<irzyxel> long time no see !
<irzyxel> hows the kids
<Randy`> still in my testicles, thankfully

Hooka: I'm going to pee on you
Ralphy_Fox: that'd be hot
lemonlimeskull: Only for a while, then it'd cool off.

<StrangelyUnoriginal>So I was at Walmart, being the financial
transaction overlord of register 21.
Rite, and this kid walks up, I ring up his items and he says,
"So I heard you like mudkips?" so I acted all confused like he
expected me to andhe had a little faggoty giggle then he asked
me what his total was and I said, "Your total, IT'S OVER NINE
THOUSSSSSSAAAAND!" and my manager was like, "lol wtf?" then I
grabbed the pricing scanner and crushed it in my hand.

<&Dynamic_Inc> ive decided to play a huge prctical joke on my
friends
<&Dynamic_Inc> ima slip 2 of them the date rape drug when they
are REALLY drunk
<&Dynamic_Inc> then with the help of my other friends, strip
them naked, and put them in      bed together, spooning
<&Dynamic_Inc> beat one of them on the ass, so when they wake
up its sore
<&Dynamic_Inc> and smear some blood and poop on the sheets
<&Dynamic_Inc> there gunna wake up and be like "O.O fuck."
<&Dynamic_Inc> one of them will turn gay because of it
<&Dynamic_Inc> and they will both act wiered for years
<&Dynamic_Inc> then like 5 years down the road
<&Dynamic_Inc> ill tell them the truth
<&Dynamic_Inc> and then run like fuck
<&Dynamic_Inc> its gunna be great
<%Airegorne> can i help?

Jmack- i was dreaming of eating a marshmallow
B-dawg- and what happened?
Jmack- when i woke up
b-dawg- then what
Jmack- my pillow was gone......
b-dawg- ........wtf......

<jo> apparently, according to Josh, the Swiss-French border is
at risk of being sucked in by a black hole
<jo> they're experimenting with time/space stuff there
<Lewin> haha
<Lewin> try staying out of that one, switzerland

* Nanobot primarily uses a pi-based counting system
<Nanobot> I know all of the digits in pi
<Nanobot> It's 10

<nista> i was explaining to a claimant why a defendant was
being sued
<nista> i told him that the defendant violated a federal
statute
<nista> he said "VIOLATED A FEDERAL STATUE?!? WHICH ONE, THE
LINCOLN MEMORIAL?!?"

<zak> I once almost kissed a girl but then she woke up.. then
i woke up

<scott> Where were your born?
<scott> homoland?
<scott> Thats not even possible.

Lord Kagemaro: Want a PS3?
IDLon2000: No
Lord Kagemaro: :/
Lord Kagemaro: I'm bored with mine

<@Sadist> http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/e/ef/
Age_of_Consent.png
<@Sadist> data for age of consent all around the world.
<Dano> Is that in your bookmarks?
<@Sadist> its my home page

bendingoutward: last night was so hardcore that i moshed with
a guy in a wheelchair.

<Foamy> im a little teapot
<Foamy> short and stout
<Foamy> here is my handle
* Trueborn has kicked Foamy from #totse (get the fuck out)

<ralph> perl is the lossy compression for programming
languages

<Dack Falu> WTF, there are Bomberman fanfics
<Dack Falu> Did that shit have a storyline?
<Stultus> Someone's probably written a fanfic for Tetris
<Saturn V> THE L BLOCK TAKES ME BY THE HAND AND PLUGNES ITSELF
NEATLY INTO ME, FORMING A LINE
<Saturn V> I MOAN BUT THEN PART OF ME VANISHES
<Saturn V> FOREVER.

<Kkooly> rumick whyd you download the same episode 3 times
<jkpolk> He probably has a triple monitor setup

<Drakkel> is it sad that I'm looking through national sex
offender databases of areas where I live?
<Lai> I would have tried the personals first, really.

<Hitman2005> I got a new Car stereo the other day, it comes
equipped with'VOICE RECOGNITION!'.
<Hitman2005> So if i shout "Rock", it searches, and play rock
music, If i shout 'SOUL' it searches for soul music, same with
country music etc,etc.
<Hitman2005> Only problem is, i had some children run out in
front of my car the other day,
<Hitman2005> I shouted "FUCKING KIDS", Then Michael Jacksons
'THRILLER' came on :S

<+Tigrael> you're a bash mod now?
<%kastein> yup.
<%spock1104> kastein: tell them to stop rejecting quotes that
rock and accepting quotes that suck
<%kastein> spock1104: hey
<%kastein> them includes me now
* %kastein goes back to being a nazi mod
<%kastein> MUST THROW MORE QUOTES IN THE OVEN

<@blaxthos> one token to unite them
<@kastein> murdrface: and in a ring bind them

<slashdotuser> I still think the only real way to communicate
with outlying civilisations properly will be with supernovas.
<slashdotuser> Though, only one message could be send - "Help
our sun is blowing u^&"%£%^&!*(())[NO CARRIER]

<kidd79> do u know what i'd like they add to Google.Earth?
<Don_Vito> ..3D graphics?
<Don_Vito> animated water, trees and stuuf??
<kidd79> orbital ion cannon

<Chainsaw> If you want to run SELinux, you need to start
installing an SELinux system. You can't just enable that
USE-flag and expect things to work.
* ML-37 grins
<Chainsaw> That's like taking 14 wheels off of your 18-wheeler
and saying "this is now a car, off we go".

<Chains> fuck that AM/PM shit, i'm european, i can have 13:37
every day!

rintin: so I fried my dads motherboard today
rintin: apparently I wasn't grounded...
rintin: now I am

caithness: Nike Brand Condoms
caithness: "Just Do It"

Kris: Happy Pi Day!
Dean: I don't celebrate pi day, but rather pi approximation
day on july 22nd or 7/22

<crabcakedeathra> where were you earlier?
<arkilla> work.
<crabcakedeathra> where you work?
<arkilla> GTE Visa. mail room clerk.
<arkilla> had some trouble with this asshole sendin in coupons
<arkilla> today he also sent in 33 motherfuggin' pennies
<arkilla> my managr called to complain, after like an hour WE
cut HIM a check for 33 cents
<crabcakedeathra> that sounds damn familiar

<aioli> i hope whoever invented the mysterious force gets his
or her penis caught in a gear
<raxvulpine> Your attempt to be gender-neutral there only sort
of worked.

<Ki> HAHAHAHA I DID IT HAHAHA FUCKERS
<Ki> I ASSEMBLED THE BED
<Mellis> hmm?
<Mellis> congratulations you're a level 2 Ikeamancer