<@_aa_> I need more friends
<@_aa_> good ones
<@_aa_> instead of bad friends
<@_aa_> but I guess there's no such thing as bad friends
<biVulate> aa: join a fraternity :P
<@_aa_> I said friends not people who will super glue my penis
to a milk crate when I'm asleep

<@Campbell> I saw the best thing today... I was around at a
mates place and these Jehovah's Witnesses came around
preaching their shit
<@Campbell> So my mate invites them in and sits down and
offers them pizza and cookies.
<@Campbell> After about 15 minutes they left very happy.
<@Campbell> We spotted them about an hour later lying in a
park staring at the sky
<@Campbell> I guess those hash cookies and that magic mushie
pizza really did its job.
<@Campbell> Who said drugs were bad?!

<%kc1313> im a good analizer
[<Nematocyst> ANALIZER?
<Nematocyst> OR ANALYZER
<%kc1313> yeah the second

<ally> i wonder what postage of a live animal would be to
washington >.>
<rcg> illegal?

<torch> is a 19" monitor big enough to run 1600x1200, or
should i get a 21"?
<qball> 1600x1200 is kinda tight on the 19
<qball> actually it's very tight
<Matt97GT> like 9 y/o tight?
<ReeferCpe> male or female?

<dreawn> I found out earlier today from an ex-AF friend of
mine that a gallon
of prize winning bull semen sells for 10 L
<dreawn> err 10 K
<dreawn> so I've taken up a new occupation and double life as
a semen rustler.
<Marmalade420> so i need is polar bear semen
<Marmalade420> and i can get money
<Marmalade420> all
<dreawn> well, prize-winning bull semen.
<dreawn> you could join my gang of ruthless thugs who steal
semen from large
creatures and try to sell it
<Marmalade420> sure
<dreawn> nothing like fleeing the farm of a north dakota
farmer with a gang of
lawmen chasing you in pickup trucks worrying about
spilling some
bull gravy out of a tin pail
<dreawn> nope, nothing at all.

RetardedCrow: www.ragingrooster.com
Chloe Margarita: You find the oddest sites. How do you do
that?
RetardedCrow: I looked up cock.
RetardedCrow: Fights, er, cock FIGHTS

<Lazy_Robot> Sometimes they dont label the gay porn gay on
kazaa....
<Lazy_Robot> I wonderd why the guys were fucking
<Lazy_Robot> thought some ladies were coming....
<Lazy_Robot> took awhile b4 I realised.

<TsN|Wildchild> yes Im a nerd... Im pushing 30 and I enjoy
playing video games, so sue me bitch
<TsN|AgentABC> im pushing 16 WC, i feel you pain
<TsN|Wildchild> thats puberty abc it will pass

<gatewatcher> heh, last year, when my parrents made me goto
ccd, i had to sit through a pro-life presentation. after, the
guy asked my friend if he was pro-life. my friend goes yes, of
course i am, i'm catholic. the guy goes, that's good. then my
friend goes, yeah, i mean you can't eat babies unless they're
born... the guy was clearly horrified.

<silk|around> whats that site where you put a name in and it
says your a homo or somthing
<silk|around> ahh got one
<silk|around> nn all

(hydroponik): lol my penis is naked and its 10 inches long :]
(cursor): hydroponik: objects in mirror are nine inches bigger
than they areally are

<@bmann> once it gets warmer im getting a fucking job
<@rambopfc> just get a snowblower, u could get a blow job

<Miz> why does windows messager not close? :E
<Miz> there isnt anything using it!
<Cheez> hotmail?
<Miz> not visible anyway
<Miz> nope
<Miz> no windows open 'cept this
<Cheez> try killing the process
* Miz has quit IRC (Connection reset by peer)
<Cheez> wrong process...

<T`karthon> This is my hard drive assnip, I just don't like
having 10 gigs of mp3s slowing my shit down
<Spleen_work> you are a stupid fuck

<[_tOz_]> people saying internet is full of childporn is so
full of bullshit...i cant find a single picture

< back2u> yeah ... somme ppl r just born loosers like urslef
...
< pairo> Hey, at least I can spell loser.
< back2u> heh.
< pairo> Not to mention "people", "are" and "yourself".
< back2u> good for you ...
< pairo> Oh, and "some".
< back2u> the caybord is not a good one :P

<bi0cide> this is rad
<bi0cide> its erotic magnetic poetry
<bi0cide> im getting off just reading the words
<bi0cide> errr
<bi0cide> :|

(@RyJones) new laptop?
(lukehop^) No, it's my old one, just gradually turning it into
a cow
(@RyJones) yeah my exwife did that

<[Knob]> IM NOT COLORBLIND, thanks to this test: http://
www.liquidgeneration.com/sabotage/vision_sabotage.asp
<rTenshi> I WISH I WERE BLIND, thanks to this page: http://
www.goatse.cx

<Arcturus|BuF> The Sims is the only game where you can kill
someone by trapping them between strategically placed toilets

<Bal> saw lotr2
<biff|JK2> u like Bal?
<Bal> when legolas calls out to gimli at the begining, i was
expecting him to say 'come on silent bob'
<Lun> LOL

<rover> I took my Ventolin puffer, and puffed it onto this
cockroach that was still
<rover> it died

<jihad> i need crack
<craz> www.gamecopyworld.com
<jihad> not this fuckin software, the drug

<Meshugga> sleep is supposed to be done between 6 am and 2 pm
<octane> whats this sleep thingie anyways?
<octane> is it something real or yet another urban legend?
<Meshugga> sleep, neut., The thing which makes all your boxen
idle
<octane> thats called `power outage' here.

*this took place on December 26th
[00:01] <chewy> </christmas>
[00:02] <berger> haha

<Kevyn> I think I'm going to buy one of those LCD screens and
snap it onto my girlfriend instead of my Gamecube.
<Kevyn> So I can play Monkey Ball and fuck her in the ass at
the same time.

<crunchyfish> It's easier to talk to girls if you find little
ways to surprise them.
<crunchyfish> Like punching them in their fucking whore face
in a dark parking lot.

<_apostle_> yea but all the really fun stuff costs more money
<_apostle_> and you need to find the right kid of hooker
<Monk_Grav> The right kid of hooker?
<Monk_Grav> I'm pretty sure that's illegal.
<_apostle_> *kind

<wangschlong> So i was walking by some house
<wangschlong> and some hot girl was staring at me from the
house
<wangschlong> so i go closer and shes still staring at me
<wangschlong> it turns out
<wangschlong> IT WAS A FUCKING LAMP

<fiddler> how do u ppl say either, like i-ther or like e-ther?
<jnss> i don't say either

<Sirex> i should set the ping reply as a negative number
<Sirex> and tell people i'm from the future

<MightyBlueJustice> If Jesus would've been shot to death
instead of crucified would christians wear jewelry with
firearms on it?
<K-Necrocide> It kinda makes you wish he was assraped to death
with a big black cock.

* Mr`Anders is now known as MrAndersn
<TreOptik> mrandersn sounds like a pedophile biochemestry
teacher
***later
<_spirit_> hmm mr anderson... that reminds me of highschool
<TreOptik> i said something like that too ..

<LeX|NgToN> i got a blister on the inside of my hand =/
<Vagabonde> haha, from wacking off?
<LeX|NgToN> Y DOES EVERYONE ASSUME THAT?!

<StillAway> omg i got spam saying 'someone at work likes you'.
they really dont target this shit well do they, I DONT HAVE A
FUCKING JOB

<robg> Fuck. My room is still on fire.
<robg> It's a small electrical one, though.
<robg> My moms trying to take care of it.
<NonToxic> robg then GET OFF IRC!!

joerodZ3: ppl should chase their dreams
joerodZ3: it's the route to happiness
RGarza983: and jailtime

<cronwrk> this is a really stupid question.. but anyway.. what
drivers should you use with microsoft wheelman mouse.. will
logitech drivers work?

*** m0ndi changes topic to '[01:08] <Lottiepie> now i don't
have pussy anymore [01:10] <m0ndi> u left it at your ex bf's
place that he can have some fun with [01:10] <Lottiepie> yep 
:)'
<m0ndi> i guess thats enuff
<Lottiepie> the topic is too big
<mensab> nothings too big as long as is all goes in
<mensab> errrm... that could go into bash :P

<voidnull> Computers destroyed my life. Today when my mum told
me to get up, I asked her for the password.

<Kaitlin> Holy shit my chair just broke right out from under
me... I was just sitting here and next thing I know I'm on the
ground and the keyboard tray has fallen down on top of me
<Kaitlin> I'm not a fatass, I swear!!!! *inno*
<Shala> i was refraining from that comment, tubby

<Matto20V> get lost
<uneekwahn> I can't
<uneekwahn> I have a map
* Matto20V points at his asshole
* uneekwahn opens his map for "the grand canyon"

<Mosqui^> but don't diss clothes
<Mosqui^> clothes rule
<Mosqui^> i love clothes
<Mosqui^> and i love shopping for clothes
<Mosqui^> .....god i'm a woman

<+ [Frost2] > fuck theres something in my eye
<psychicbug> frost got a cumshot in the eye
<psychicbug> ...again
<@ [ArtForz]> he prolly saw it cumming
<psychicbug> hahaha
<+ [Frost2] > you guys are sick k thx

* DrZaius sets mode: +b *.*!*@*
<DrZaius> lmao
<sneve> haha
<Air|THPS2> doc
<Air|THPS2> why *.*!?
<DrZaius> i've been using dos a lot lately
<DrZaius> and wasn't thinking
* DrZaius sets mode: -b *.*!*@*

<threeve> woohoo moms password is still same as last month

* SilverH|Work is now known as SilverHorse
<SilverHorse> OMFG
<SilverHorse> I HELD MY DAMN DIAHREA ALL DAMN DAY
<SilverHorse> THEN I JUST GOT HOME
<SilverHorse> IT WAS LIKE FUCKING HIROSHIMA
<SilverHorse> I mean jesus
<SilverHorse> you could hear the splash across the house
<SilverHorse> it literally covered the entire surface area of
my ass
<SilverHorse> japanese people died when I let it go

<Jeph> Anyone have a dedicated server, my host is going out of
business, and we were buds so I wasn't paying anything, and
can't right now... heh?
<sbrain> maybe thats why they were going out of business

<HitlerYouth88> all i want is a white girl for xmas :(