<GothYena> I have a brother who breeds wolves in Alabama.
<RosenOttr> breeds them, or with them?
<|Wolf|> :D
<GothYena> I'll assume both.

<prence> Tired of Whacking Off? Have A Local Escort At Your
Doorstep in a 1/2 Hour!
! prence clicks!
<obs1d1an> what you gonna do when your gramma shows up and
shes the escort?
<tooms> he's gonna ask her to take her teeth out
<tooms> again
<prence> duh
<prence> if im paying im playing

<StmChser> sex is like math
<StmChser> - the clothes, + the bed, / the legs, ...and pray
to god you don't multiply.

<an_ass733> You know what's funny?
<an_ass733> The current Slim Fast ad.
<an_ass733> The women in it say "It's so easy to lose weight
with Slim Fast"
<an_ass733> And the fine print at the bottom of the screen
says "Losing weight is not easy."

<Patrick> my mom just gave me 10 more dollars
<Patrick> i feel like saying
<Patrick> "thanks for supporting my drinking habit mom"

<Xapz> war soon
<Xapz> Maybe tomorrow
<Xapz> We've pulled out ambassadors
<m0swald> http://www.cnn.com/2003/US/Northeast/03/04/
iraq.usa.shirt.reut/index.html
<Sh0rty> :
<Sh0rty> stupid americans :|
<Sh0rty> canada > all
<m0swald> my giant american pee pee would rip your
canadian-wang-trained females apart!
<Sh0rty> :o
<m0swald> I'm american, therefore my wang is gigantic.  at
least, that's what the media tells me
<m0swald> not to mention, I'm TEXAN, so it must be doubly huge
<m0swald> I assume it's true, too.  because every woman I've
shown it to has giggled in terror!
<m0swald> IN TERROR

<MB13534> does tne @ symbol next to the name mean idle?

<enigma> was talking to this guy at uni yesterday.  he said
the thing he missed most about uni was the pointless
conversations we had.  i asked him if he's heard of irc.

<HackerJoe^Away> hell, don't you guys ever read isonewz or
nforce... how did you get in here?
<TheBrax> I used packetne*s (just in case it's a bad word) and
xdccspy
*** mfer sets mode: +b *!*@DAABE17B37.addictz.net
*** TheBrax was kicked by mfer (*xdccspy* - word not allowd in
#Datavault - 5 mins Ban.)

<Volksweasel> how odd...everyone appears to be...DEAD!!
* Volksweasel runs away screaming!
<Corin> hmm thats the way the thriller video turns out isnt
it?

.!. @Risiken wonders where her cam is being hosted =\
.!. BoHolbrook wonders where his balls are being hosted
( Psy ) [BoHolbrook]: www.tiny.com

<Nivex> if it weren't for the users, sysadminning would be
easy :-/

<GoatBoy> ackshully I have some white chocolate macadamia nut
cookies here
<GoatBoy> for dessert
= Slinky/#austin clubs goatboy over the head and divvies the
cookies with wendy
<GoatBoy> hah
<GoatBoy> i licked em
<GoatBoy> so they're mine.
= GoatBoy/#austin ponders that for a moment
<GoatBoy> i wonder if that would work in a bar
<Slinky> i can irradiate them
<GoatBoy> can you irradiate the semen out of them too?
·f· GoatBoy was kicked off #austin by Slinky (you are one
nasty fuck, has anyone told you lately?)

<DJCookieMonster> Tell your mother to stop changing her
lipstick. My dick is like a friggin rainbow.

<iddqd> have you read hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy?
<elf> ya
<iddqd> it r l333t
<iddqd> i've only read up to halfway of restaurant @ the end
of the universe...
<iddqd> need to carry on
<elf> have u read my gf jsut dumpped me so i played quake all
night ?
<iddqd> ouch
<iddqd> soz man :/
<elf> dont worry , i have bash.org , i can laugh at all the
OTHER pathetic loosers out there
<iddqd> haha that's the spirit

<EthenWork> I want my tombstone to say "Exceeded TTL"

<Liquids> man I have to broaden my date horizons
<Liquids> I am so sick of starting dates off with "are you a
cop" and ending it with "do you take visa"
<Liquids> could be worse
<Liquids> they could start with "asl" and end with /ignore

(skootlez): WrxionWRK.....
(skootlez): wanna fuck?
* WrxionWRK takes a deep breath
(WrxionWRK): I'm sorry im going to have to decline your offer
for sexual intercourse at this time, due to unforseen
circumstances.
(WrxionWRK): however, i do wish you the very best in your
ventures.
(WrxionWRK): this was an automated message. Please do not
reply.
* WrxionWRK breathes

<djv> psykiv..sorry about your loss
<djv> BUY A MACINTOSH NEXT TIME.
<djv> ;)
<The-Virus> why buy a mac
<The-Virus> its like buying a car thats only compatible with
10% of the roads

<Cody> where'd you two meet again?
<Derian> a mud.
<Cody> ahh
<Derian> Yah. I'm just glad he wasn't an axe murderer.
<Cody> heh, yeah
<Derian> but he swears he's never murdered a single axe
so.....
<Cody> well that's good to know
<Derian> If you're an axe.

<MooseWare> Anyone in here know a good IRC server to find
people who are intersted in making game?
<MooseWare> games*
<Raggedy-Asmo> #redundant-questions
<MooseWare> that chat is empty
<CrazYGuyMrkII> lol
<Valeria> rofl
<Raggedy-Asmo> lol Val
<MooseWare> im serious, its empty
<Valeria> ;)
<MooseWare> except for me, of course
<Raggedy-Asmo> hey, let's send that one to bash
<CrazYGuyMrkII> rofl
<Valeria> already there
<CrazYGuyMrkII> thats like that other one
<CrazYGuyMrkII> join #someonewhocares
<CrazYGuyMrkII> im the only one there
<Raggedy-Asmo> lol
<MooseWare> that room is empty too
<CrazYGuyMrkII> lol
<MooseWare> grr

<DrSuse> i remember when no one knew of limp bizkit
<@`2L_Flashing> the good old days?
<+Ford[Gone]> wish it'd stayed that way
<DrSuse> that ruled :(

<rufees> Ron Jeremy was a decent guy. He is such a Troma fan
that he worked on the movie for free. Troma payed for his
Hotel , and I believe his airfare and food ( if that was what
we ate ), but that was it. The funny thing about Ron was that
he wasn't just some novelty to have in the film ... he can act
, and I mean well. I was shocked at his ability to learn his
lines quickly and he had excellent comedic timing. It caught
me off guard. He is definitely a sex maniac though. You'd
think a day off from shooting porn he wouldn't concern himself
with getting laid , but he goes up to one of the actresses in
the middle of the day and shows her his index finger and says
"You know why you should masterbate with this finger ?" and
she goes "No?" and he replies "Because it's mine". Sleazy, but
fuckin' funny.

memories keep: I don't want to wait until marriage. But i
don't want a dick to take my vriginity.

<Tetsuro> You have a blog?
<Kat> dude
<Kat> I'm an angsty suburbian teenager
<Kat> and you're asking me if I have a WEBLOG?

<Dj|Gallow> TUNE IN
<Dj|Gallow> GOD DAMN IT
<IntrepiD`GNR> Dj|Gallow: we have children present
<Dj|Gallow> sorry
<Dj|Gallow> TUNE THE FUCK IN KIDS

<Kevyn> God it's fucking cold out. The temperature in
Massachusetts has dipped into the teens more than R Kelly.

*** M3DU54 signoff (Quit: GTG... damn cat got its tail stuck
in the printer again)

<Extigy> Ships are Long, Hard and full of sea men!
<blondee> i don't get it....

specul8tor: I have no girlfriend....she dumped me
specul8tor: dummy
sprightlygirl: thats sucks, im sorry to hear it...
specul8tor: she will regret it one day....when she realizes
that no one could possibly put down the love like me
sprightlygirl: lol
sprightlygirl: at least your ego's not bruised

<Kermee> SELECT * FROM {[chicks]} WHERE {[bust_size]} > 32C
AND NOT {[is_fat_chick]} AND {[looks]} = Hot! AND NOT
{([is_psych_student]} OR {[is_law-student]} OR
{[is_commerce_student])} AND {[will_swallow]} = True AND
{[has_own_cash]} :P
<Astatine> oh, good one :P
<Astatine> I think we've just made a SQL statement for the
perfect woman :P <Kermee> now if only there where such a
table..

<slac`> there's this mineral ( formula: (Mg,Fe)7Si8O22(OH)2 )
which was found in Cummington, MA.
<slac`> it is therefor called: Cummingtonite
<[Ci]CougarFou> that sounds like a dangerous mineral.  I bet
you have to wash your hands throughly after handling it.

<DJ_Phatiguez> there is a way you can actually do a jedi mind
trick?
<cow> of course there is
<@tolikin-skywalk> DJ_Phatiguez: rohypnol
<Githzerai> Why does he wave his hand then?
<cow> misdirection
<DJ_Phatiguez> ahahah i got ejected from a pub for trying to
do a jedi mind trick when they ID'd me
<DJ_Phatiguez> 'you dont need to see any identification.'

<Verl> www.internet.com/dvds.rock/yestheydo.htlm
<Verl> html^
<0dan0> nice botched joke, loser
<Verl> ahem
<Verl> 'at least i dont put how many times ive had sex in
front of my name, and how many time ill ever have sex after
it'

<Thorndy> whats the worst geek?
<ashley> the worst possible geeeks know that they are geeks
but think they are better than anyone else.
<ashley> watch
<ashley> DEGEEK YOURSELF DANIEL
<paveway> keep dreaming

March 4 2003 02:15AM:
<Miro-kun> HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!
<Miro-kun> damn lag.

<bos> how many 1/8 cups are in 1 cup
<infox> 8?
<bos> ;[ thats what i thought but i wasnt sure

<Spike> I want to write an OS that gives error messages in
laymen's terms
<Spike> "Your computer is fuckin broke yo. Reset this shit"

<himitsu> Can anyone think of a science experiment i can do at
home?
<himitsu> I have this assignment i have to do for year 10
science and i need to carry out an investigation.
<himitsu> Just give me a question i can find out,like do
different brands of liquid paper dry faster and does brown ice
cream melt faster than white.
<BastardKnight> Oh. Oh! Do an analysis of what happens when
you mix a base and an acid as opposed to what happens you play
bass and do acid. It'll be a smash hit.

<Anatole> Drug money supports terrorism. Oil money supports
terrorism. Tax money supports terrorism.
<Anatole> I just cut out the middlemen and write a check each
week for ten dollars, made out to "TERRORISM."
<Ein> sweet
<Ein> where do I mail my check?
<Anatole> Wherever. The terrorists will find it.

<Beige> It's one o'clock.
<Beige> Do you know where your children are?
<Apollyon> In my testes.

<DavidRei> Life is like an analogy.

<dewwop> maybe i should masturbate more?
<Sir_Frag> with 60 grit sandpaper even
<Sir_Frag> for extra pleasure
<skold> haha 60 grit
<skold> talk about tearin some shit up
<skold> your cock would be a mangled piece of dangling penis
flesh
<dewwop> ill just use steel wool
<Annieland> ooh i love steel wool

<ZahanTheThief[B-A]> god damnit this porn i dled has a dude in
it
<Yeti[B-A]> porns normally do
<ZahanTheThief[B-A]> the only dick i wana see while i watch
porn is mine

<Drown> think about linux and you won't prematurely ejaculate

<Gwindor> how do you save a log?
<Rimbaud> don't flush

<jjwalker> he was right, our mom is a weirdo...I went to go
play laser tag, and I didn't tell her where I was going...and
when I walked in just now she fucking assaulted my ass...with
fists
<jjwalker> then she threw a book at me 0_o
<_seb_> damn man she anally fisted you?
<_seb_> that sucks
<_seb_> must have hurt

<iconc1ast> my rhymes are fatter than the average irc girl

< ihatestan > well obviously there is nothing to do so i'm
going to see if sperm is flamable

<AndrewLB> So what if they are lesbians?
<AndrewLB> WOOHOO! TWO GIRLS MAKING OUT! THEIR MUSIC MUST BE
AWSOME
<JtotheB> :D
<JtotheB> Oddly enough, that's my exact reasoning.
<AndrewLB> Ya know, if you want lesbian pornography, you could
always ask
<AndrewLB> SOMEONE ELSE
<AndrewLB> >_>
<AndrewLB> <_<