<Kormiic> Ever look at your own code and think, "What the fuck
is this meant to do?!"
<maznaz> most mornings
<Kormiic> I said "code", not "cock"
<Kormiic> ;)
<maznaz> oh
<maznaz> yeah, still most mornings :)
<Kormiic> Right, if that doesn't get approved for Bash, I'll
rub cum in my eyes.

<|404notfound> when you play DDR, you're dancing with SATAN
<|404notfound> unless, you know, you're doing two player
<|404notfound> because then Satan doesn't have room to play

-!- WetWired has joined #linux
< WetWired> Wow, how... boring.
-!- WetWired has left #linux []
<@supruzr> he's gone. bust out with the clowns and the drugs
and the hookers.

<Sans_Scope> Oh no!  How will Macgyver escape this debacle?
<+Shaezerus> Duct tape, chewing gum, and an orbital laser
(made from duct tape and chewing gum).

<Altoid> "There are now fewer than 30,000 orangutans left and
it is likely that they will become extinct in the wild in as
little as 20 years' time if this decline continues,"
<BridgetJ> awwww poor orangutans
<Altoid> I knoooow
<Altoid> :(
<dregn> i think we should eat more of them
<dregn> enjoy them while they are still around

<[G4]CowBook> weren't u beat up by an 8yr old girl like last
year?
<DannyBoy> she was 12 dude
<DannyBoy> big difference
<DannyBoy> she caught me off guard
<DannyBoy> I would have pounded the little bitch

<anamexis> oh man
<anamexis> I was opening a coke, right
--> Beefpile (~mbeefpile@cloaked.wi.rr.com) has joined #
themacmind
<anamexis> and it exploded
<anamexis> ALMOST all over my keyboard
<anamexis> but I got it away just in time
<-- Beefpile has quit (sick fuckers)
<anamexis> :<

<afk> thats why people who "try" to commit suicide dont really
want to die
<SLoW> did you know, on average, men are more likely to
succeed then women?
<SLoW> and that a man's weapon of choice is a gun, and a
woman's is pills
<Candy^^> men never care about making a mess
<Candy^^> ;p

<@Fam|work> I was at the airport, and this family were having
ALL their bags searched
<@Fam|work> and the one teenage girl was bitching at the other
teenage girl saying "I told you not to make a joke about a
bomb".

<INTERNET> god
<INTERNET> I reemmber this one time
<INTERNET> in an airplane
<INTERNET> I was with my mom
<INTERNET> and I was like... 11
<INTERNET> well I saw these things called Sanitary Napkins
<INTERNET> I thought they wre wetnaps
<INTERNET> like those things from restaurants
<INTERNET> so I got like a handful of them
<INTERNET> and ran out of the bathroom and I screamed,
"MOM!!!! I GOT THOSE SANITARY NAPKINS YOU LIKE SO MUCH!!!!!!"
<INTERNET> EVERYONE ON THE PLANE WENT APESHIT AND MY MOM WAS
JUST LAUGHING!!!!
<INTERNET> she was like, "WILLIAM THOSE ARE TAMPONS NOT
WETNAPS!!!"

<douchebag> do u declare your variables when doing pseudo
code?

<gordo> who here knows their trance well?
<gordo> i need the title of that trance song, with the choir
singing in the background
<gordo> (high pitch) la la la la la, la la la la
<gordo> (lower) la la la laaaaaaa, la (high) la la
<WardoG> Wow that's specific

<[]OTB[]Orange> apparently girls gone wild "just got wilder"
<ninex-knp> ?
<[]OTB[]Orange> i don't know about you, but i certainly don't
want to see willy wonka bare his breasts

bloodninja: My turnips listen for the soft cry of your love.
My insides turn to celery as I unleash my warm and sticky
cauliflower of love.
Katie_007: What the f*ck is this madlibs? I'm outta here.
bloodninja: Yeah, well I already unleashed my cauliflower, all
over your olives, and up in your eyes. Now you can't see.
Bitch.

<santa> if nasa was smart they'd send something tomars to grab
a huge fucking bucket of mars sand
<santa> and take it back
<santa> and sell it by the gram
<santa> like "MARS SAND KEYCHAINS - 300 bucks"
<santa> talk about grassroots funding programs ;)

<jaga> does anyone here have a computer?

<felix> what is asl?
<felix> asshole?

<Chiffy> hah
<Chiffy> I was at a local skateboard shop with my mom
<Chiffy> and I look up and see a deck with a picture of a
drunk mexican screwing a crocodile and I laugh
<Chiffy> she looks up
<Chiffy> and mentions something like 'oh animal planet
crocodile guy'
<Chiffy> it took about 5 seconds for her to go 'uh, wait'

<auto-jack> one of my users needs to disable their antivirus
<auto-jack> "to run a test."
<Redline> testing their will to be employed

--> therevelator (~none@artemis.stud.uni-goettingen.de) has
joined #linux-kernel
<therevelator> hi. does anybody know how to make the
init-process look look like star wars?

<tangent3> george bush wants to send missions to moons and the
mars
<tangent3> i think the search for weapons of mass destruction
is getting desperate

<acrimonious> dude
<acrimonious> Celeron
* acrimonious feels unclean

* Quits: Serge (Connection reset by peer)
* Joins: Abe
<Locke|Away> Have you considred sacrificing a pig to appease
the evil spirits plaguing your internet connection, Serge? 
Western medicine seems to have failed you.
<Abe> well, right now it all comes down to the network
engineer's bad back. if he hadn't hurt his back, he would have
fixed it by now; as it is, he's off until monday
<Locke|Away> Well, have you considered sacrificing a pig for
his back?  An evil dab may have followed him home from work. 
It might be eating his marrow.
<Locke|Away> Look, I'm hungry and I want some fucking bacon. 
Just kill a pig already.

Berrik  I swear I hate German
Berrik  You take some 3-letter word in English
Berrik  and in German it's "Schtuffwaftefloswhosit"

<Trigger> anyone here know what kind of virus would create
about 100 directories that don't exist?
<Rakoth> windows
<Adam9> or a corrupted filesystem
<Rakoth> that's what I said ;)

<asial> fuck you, youre sometimes just a fucking baby!
<`Riku> oh yeah?
<`Riku> Well, guess what that makes YOU?
<`Riku> A pedophile!
<`Riku> and I'll be damned if I'm being lectured by a pervert!

WallJam7: roses are red
WallJam7: violets are blue
WallJam7: all of my base
WallJam7: are belong to you

<The`Artful`Dodger> My fucking physics teacher has a spongebob
squarepants poster in his class :|
<The`Artful`Dodger> It says "E = MC Squaredpants"

<[NCA]Spank> I was pretty dumb about computers. <[NCA]Spank>
Then I learned you could get porn on them. <[NCA]Spank> 3
years later I'm a system administrator.

<Dark_Fox> Kami: if you changed your name to Kame, you would
have a much more interesting name :)
<Kami> Dark_Fox: And if you changed yours to Dark_Fax, you'd
have a more communicative name. :)
* Dark_Fox is now known as Dark_Fax
<Kami> It'd be... 'telecommunicative.'
* Dark_Fax makes noises and bitches because he's out of paper
ant toner *
<Kami> Oh god, that happened at work today.
<Dark_Fax> FEED MEE!!!
<SailorV> Nuuuuuuuu
* Dark_Fax displays wrong time *
* Dark_Fax rings for no reason *
* Kami is now known as VCR-clock
* Dark_Fax gets a paper jam *
* VCR-clock blinks
* VCR-clock blinks
* VCR-clock blinks
* VCR-clock blinks
* VCR-clock blinks
* VCR-clock blinks
<Dark_Fax> PAPPPERRRRR
* VCR-clock blinks
<Dark_Fax> TOOOOOONEEERRRR
* VCR-clock blinks
<VCR-clock> :)
* Dark_Fax breaks a bearing and bounces around on the counter
*
<Dark_Fax> FEEEED ERROORRR!!!! NEED PAPER!!
* Dark_Fax rings again for no reason *
* VCR-clock blinks some more
* SailorV runs and hides becuz there are weirdo's in here
* Dark_Fax chases SailorV *  MY PAPER!!! MY PREEESCIOUUUS!!
* VCR-clock blinks
* VCR-clock blinks
<SailorV> EEEE!
* SailorV unplugs the VCR
* VCR-clock has quit IRC
* Dark_Fax is now known as Dark_Fox
<Dark_Fox> ok i think ive peaked the humor of that

<@TunaRoll> wow, i  spelled bukkake wrong and google corrected
me

<malaclypse> The general rule on about people on IRC seems to
be "Attractive, single, mentally stable: choose two"

* maria hurts
<maria> and whenever i close my eyes i can see scrolling
arrows and hear j-pop
<peterS> the first step toward getting rid of a ddr addiction
is to admit that you have a problem
<maria> yes, i do
<maria> one of the pads is broken

<fate-sg> it's almost as bad as rofl
<fate-sg> which to me is a bark gone wrong

<Fuzzi> I've never seen more stars in Ozzfest before.
<GoRe> Stars? I've seen bigger stars when I accidently sat on
my nuts.

<Eglin> yuck.... didn't think that asking about a c# like
static string method would start a stinking flame war.
<pedantic> Eglin: you are new to irc aren't you

<MortalKombat> stfu mat|t u cu.nt
* Acaila sets mode: +b MortalKombat!*@*
<@Acaila> FINISH HIM
<mat|t> rofl
<MortalKombat> omg wtf man
* MortalKombat was kicked by Acaila (forward, forward, back,
back, forward, punch)
<@Acaila> FATALITY!

<@Karnaugh> amazing, Cat5 seems reletivly imune to cellphone
radiation
<@Pandaemon> Karnaugh: you're going to start wearing a Cat5
turban, aren't you?
<@Karnaugh> Pandaemon: Thats what all the arabian hackers wear
these days

<Ruth> hmmm first thing to do when one gets home is .... check
spam for emails

< tcowher> personally I'm annoyed that they can get 11KBps
from mars but can't get me a stable 5KBps over 17 miles.

<Kintai> Yes, boobs are like toy trains
<Wallaroo> ?
<Kintai> They're meant for children, but grown men tend to end
up playing with them anyway.
<Placebo> hahahahaha
<Placebo> ROFL

* jane masturbates
< applemacdude> god
< jane> YES!
< jane> found it

* trib has just *almost* burned his flat to the ground
<bobstay> wow
<bobstay> how did you manage that?
<bobstay> the ground's quite a way away
<trib> I put a big lump of meat int he oven and roasted it
<trib> and used the smoke detector as a timer

« lgcbmb » on topic question; where can i get more old man
porn?

<Xenocide> i brought a dvd for a teacher
<Dodge2k1> huzzah!
<Xenocide> and i have 2 differnt things named EVA on it
<Xenocide> iatneh and regular
<Dodge2k1> lol
<Xenocide> :( i was supposed to bring the regular
<Xenocide> but i brought the iatneh on accident
<jasonn02> PRON?
<Xenocide> It was about to start on the projector
<Xenocide> but then i saw the label on the dvd
<Dodge2k1> omfg
<jasonn02> IT WAS PR0n?!?!
<Xenocide> and jumped over and pressed eject before it could
start
<Xenocide> YES
<jasonn02> LOLOL
<jasonn02> ROFLMAO
<Xenocide> ALMOST PROJECTED ON A HUGE FUCKING SCREEN
<jasonn02> NEET
<Kabuki_Dude> OMG
<Xenocide> i almost had a heart attack

<InuYasha> Rabies isn't an STD is it?
<Ronald_MacK> It is if it's oral sex.

<PitChic> did you all see about that 97 year old woman who was
found alive in the rubble of the earthquake in Iran, after 8
days burried?
<Marcus``> that's fucked up
<Marcus``> old people are like indestructible, as long as they
don't don't fall down and break their hip
<Marcus``> help! i've fallen and I can't get up!
<Marcus``> and a house is on me!

<DrBacchus> fajita: RFC 2795
<fajita> DrBacchus: excuse me?
<DrBacchus> fajita: You're supposed to give me a link.
<fajita> DrBacchus: i'm not following you...
<DrBacchus> dumb bot
<fajita> Stupid human

<Fooz> In a perfect world... spammers would get caught, go to
jail, and share a cell with many men who have enlarged their
penisses, taken Viagra and are looking for a new relationship.

< DiEsElBoY-DnB> i gotta a pretty hot woman, she cooks and
cleans for me too
<@Scruffypoo> DiEsElBoY-DnB: and every night you kiss her
before she tucks you in, cause you love your mommy