Browse The Logs - #AFKonIRC

#561675

Score: 1783

<Ashley> No, believe me... my job SUCKS.
<Ashley> We have to clock out to go to the bathroom. What kind
of shit is that?
<Robert> The kind you don't get paid for.

#561572

Score: 182

<stark> hi guys, anyone got a webpage on how ms exchange
works?
<@normal1> sure
<@normal1> <html><title>How MS exchange works</title><head>
<body> MS EXCHANGE SUCKS ARSE </body></head>
<takeaction> normal1: WOW! I think that's the best explination
of exchange I have ever seen...

#561408

Score: 397

<Baintz> Wikipedia is now used like the dictionary, meant to
be serious but used to look up dirty words

#561386

Score: 357

<Ryuhou> bravo is pissing me off with its "movies that changed
the world!" crap.
<Ryuhou> they keep saying "men stopped having affairs in 1987
after fatal attraction."
<Ryuhou> i'm sorry.  what world are you from?
<Ryuhou> of course
<Ryuhou> they follow that up with a
<Ryuhou> IT STAYS IN VEGAS commercial

#561357

Score: 499

<Mr_Blud> That looks like a mosquito
<ThunderMax> I hate mosquitos
<ThunderMax> they're like the Jehovah's Witnesses of nature

#561141

Score: 1880

<quadropheniac57> so we're talking about aboriginal symbols in
school today
<quadropheniac57> and i tell my group that i read it was bad
luck to kill an emu, except i say emo on accident
<quadropheniac57> so i laugh and say "actually, it's pretty
good luck to kill an emo"
<quadropheniac57> this girl, overweight, dyed black hair,
eyeshadow, not goth but close
<quadropheniac57> says "no, emo is sad. emo is short for
emotional"
<quadropheniac57> so i respond "no, emo is short for stupid"
<quadropheniac57> she says "no, it's for emotional. emo people
are emotional beings who live that way to relieve their pain"
<quadropheniac57> i say "emo people are self-absorbed
attention-seeking idiots who listen to crappy music"
<quadropheniac57> rest of class, she gives me the most dark
and depressed death glare
<quadropheniac57> THE WHOLE REST OF CLASS, that's like 45
minutes, she's just death-looking me, not even turning her
head
<quadropheniac57> i swear, she's gonna kill herself this
weekend, and it's all my fault
<civilpunkbikes> good luck coming your way
<quadropheniac57> amen

#560932

Score: 392

<ckoo> haha some lady asked me where she could get headphones
so I told her "the source"  aka radioshack.   She walked
outside,  turned,  and walked straight toward "SOURCE adult
video"
<reaper> Ahahahah!

#560745

Score: 81

<shaine> Siege: kansas' best song is dust in the wind. listen
to it
<Siege> k ill download it
<Siege> Haha i accidentally typed in "dst in the wind" in the
search box
<Siege>  and child pron came up.
<shaine> you must have turned on 'my favorites' or something.

#560710

Score: 761

<andkore> can somebody say something positive the government
has done in the past 5 years? please?
<gorn> no, you'd have to go to before bush was elected to see
something positive
<JuggaloAnt> when clinton banged that chick?
<gorn> yeah
<gorn> that was positive
<gorn> make love not war

#560674

Score: 1337

GeoffSharron: a spider just hid inside my keyboard
GeoffSharron: and this sentence probably crushed him
GeoffSharron: i think he was under the m key
GeoffSharron: mmmm
GeoffSharron: m key
GeoffSharron: m m m m

#560613

Score: 666

<Black_Kniggit> That's nothing compared to back when I played
Fallout 2
<Black_Kniggit> I stole the coins from every NPC in the entire
game!
<Black_Kniggit> and I didn't just steal it as such, I stole it
one coin at a time until I had five coins (unless if I failed
in which case I would load my game and try again) then I got
150 exp and saved my game. Then I did it again. This gave me A
LOT of exp points.
<Medmera> WTF?
<Black_Kniggit> Sometimes I used the steal skill to give them
back money, so I could steal some more
<Medmera> you will lose your virginity in your next life.

#560559

Score: 1219

<VUlpixLover> making fun of people who can't read is
intolerable.  you shouldn't say anything mean about them.
<NoTruth> Yeah you should write it.

#560540

Score: 491

<anarch> A restaurant in northeastern China that advertised
illegal tiger meat dishes was found instead to be selling
donkey flesh _ marinated in tiger urine, a newspaper reported
Thursday.
<anarch> cant wait to go to china!
<Landslide> SOUNDS GRRRRREEEAAT

#560513

Score: 10

tboz86: okay, so... some guy in new york stabbed a 10 month
old baby last night that was just hanging out in her stroller
squeamish: was he from New Orleans?
tboz86: idk, but who stabs a 10 month old
kimono: a mental case on drugs
tboz86: seriously, that kid will be scared for life

#560470

Score: 470

<nick> grah windows just crashed again, unstable crap.
<yukito> Windows isn't unstable, it's just spontaneous.

#560292

Score: 568

SleepyDog Two more generations and you'll be able to fit an
iPod in your rectum
SleepyDog comfortably

#559155

Score: 441

Maxim: My alarm clock software demo expired.
Maxim: So I changed the system time by a week, and it worked.
Maxim: But I forgot to change the alarm setting accordingly.
Maxim: So the alarm didn't go off, and I missed the
appointment.
Maxim: :-(

#558467

Score: 1517

<Canas> your humor pleases only the children and the dim
witted
<JackPhantasm> same with your penis

#558075

Score: 1254

<@RaptorIIC> Error: Too many arguments when calling GirlFriend
();

#557489

Score: 877

marksmith101: hello there
Le Steph0rz: hi
marksmith101: wanna cybur??
Le Steph0rz: sure babe asl
marksmith101: 16/m/ca in florida, titusville
Le Steph0rz: 29/f/ca
Le Steph0rz: holy shit man!
marksmith101: oh strip for me babe
marksmith101: wat?
Le Steph0rz: i think i know u!
marksmith101: wtf?
Le Steph0rz: oh shit, its me, ur teacher, ms. stephanie
brown!!
Marksmith101 has logged off.

#556995

Score: 621

<Rev> my house of 1000 corpses download is done
<ix> what a waste of bandwidth
<@Volsus> unless that's a sims expansion pack

#556673

Score: 1941

prettykittikat: Im going 2 the club 2night
Syric 2005: im going 2 lern 2 tipe 2nite 2
prettykittikat: what?
Syric 2005: Exactly

#556104

Score: 1542

<themole> I was thinking of quiting my job at target
<soapy> you should look into getting a job at goatse
<soapy> I heard they have a large opening

#554909

Score: 130

<boon> today started out so aweful
<boon> I got up early, poured a bowl of cereal, OJ...I was
set. Had 45min until I had to leave for work.  I thought I'd
go downstairs and grab the laundry from the dryer before I
started eating
<boon> I get to the bottom of the stairs and *slam*...the door
to my place closes behind me
<boon> SCREWED
<Kammo> oh, no! You had to open the door?!

#554689

Score: 1769

Steve: I was buying condoms for a friend of mine at the beach
in a drug store
Steve: and I also picked up one of those freezable ice packs
cuz I hurt my knee surfing that day
Steve: I put both of the items on teh counter
Steve: the big black guy behind the counter looks at me and
says quite loudly
Steve: son, what are you gonna do to that poor girl
Steve: this older couple that was checking out looks at me and
then hurries out fo the store

#554632

Score: 741

thejew: omg i just found a memory leak that has existed since
the dawn of time
PlasmaHH: hm, this would explain why the universe is so big...

#554631

Score: 1213

<Diamant>I just compleated intercourse with your female
parental unit, as they say in the hood.

#554294

Score: 516

SuperGiddyup222: I just watched an episode of married with
children and ate a TV dinner
work it joe: youre living the american dream
work it joe: one heartbreaking piece at a time

#553813

Score: 534

<earmuff-man> Yeah the last plane out of Sydney's almost gone
<earmuff-man> And it's really got me worried
<earmuff-man> I'm goin' nowhere and I'm in a hurry
<earmuff-man> And the last plane out of Sydney's almost gone
<spinifex> earmuff man can i be an op?
<spinifex> just for tonight?
<earmuff-man> ok 
<spinifex> 
* earmuff-man sets mode: +o spinifex
* ChanServ sets mode: +l 12
<earmuff-man> Well the last plane out of Sydney's almost gone
* earmuff-man was kicked by spinifex (quit your singing bitch)
<spinifex> bahahahhhaa

#553790

Score: 3748

<Victorian_Skunk> Is there a new virus going around? My
Windows has suddenly changed to another language! I think it's
Croatian.
<Dan> You Got Serbed!

#553362

Score: 399

<pab> dude, how do you know what condom size to get
<pab> I dont want it to be ockward... but I have no idea
<pab> is there a way to view webcam over irc?
<omnica> ....
<omnica> bring the measurements to the pharmicist
<pab> it's 2am...
<omnica> bring measurements to the 7-11 attendant

#553301

Score: 1307

<EvilBlood> i had a crazy dream last night
<EvilBlood> my mother barged into my room and started hitting
my computer
<EvilBlood> i threw her down, and ended up sniffing her pussy
through her panties
<EvilBlood> weird
«@ tanlin999» so what was the dream?
<EvilBlood> oh yeah that
<EvilBlood> well

#553209

Score: 808

<timmo> it blows my mind
<timmo> that some people want to just be born, grow up, etc
just in one place
<timmo> and not go out and explore the world
<v3dd3r> shutup magellan

#552501

Score: 1079

Keewa: ::buries her head in your shit:: X3
Keewa: ...errr
Keewa: shirt*

#551813

Score: 2232

Mike: I had a random thought in the shower just before
Mike: I think I was still half asleep
Mike: if you smacked a kid in the face with a bottle of
johnson's no more tears, would it create beautiful irony?
Hopper: ROFL

#549651

Score: 1122

<Velk> I have my school pay phones on my cell contact list
<Velk> my friend and I plan to go to New York city and take
down as many pay phone numbers as we can
<Velk> and single out a person, and every payphone he passes
we'll call
<Velk> just to creep him out

#549598

Score: 1021

Threatis I'm trying to figure out what "geek" tattoo I'm
getting.
khmer Threatis: get <blink> tattooed on your eyelids

#549412

Score: 542

<AmW> I got rearended by a car with "CARMA" vanity plates
today.
<AmW> destiny can't spell.

#548837

Score: 515

<rhc> apparently it's rude if
<rhc> somebody asks if you have a light
<rhc> and you reply: "yes, but it's at the end of the tunnel"

#548669

Score: 1604

(SirJohnny) How do you feel about the US in the middle east?
(Talya) Uhhh
(Talya) They give us money
(Talya) so w00t
(SirJohnny) What if Bush woke up one day, and was like "WE'RE
GOING TO INVADE ISRAEL BECAUSE...UHM...LIKE, I THINK THEY HAVE
NUCLEAR WEAPONS!" what would you do? XD
(Talya) (we do have nuclear weapons)

#547572

Score: 798

Blade Madrigal: Why don't Libraries carry books on suicide?
Ice Sickle: They'd never get returned?
Blade Madrigal: there you go.
Ice Sickle wins.
BanishTheShadowKing: .. Dang. That's the first time I ever saw
anyone answer a joke. That's awesome.
HailFire: Neko, you have l337 skills.

#547569

Score: 3506

M8525888: here, you gotta press a and e really fast
M8525888: æ
Ryoji 17: ae
Ryoji 17: ae
Ryoji 17: ae
Ryoji 17: ae
...
Ryoji 17: ae
Ryoji 17: ae
M8525888: æ i o u
Ryoji 17: ae
Ryoji 17: ae

#546813

Score: 990

<itior> XML is like violence, if it doesn't solve the problem,
just use more.

#546800

Score: 1193

<Dogan> but I knew this one mathematician guy in college
<Dogan> he tried to apply for a grant to get funding for his
project
<Dogan> and on the form he said his project involved "studying
the effects of tropical vacations on mathematicians"

#546383

Score: 461

<Shiv> really, how can you make a "combatting illiteracy"
poster anyway?
<Shiv> make it a map to the library?

#546198

Score: 1096

<hammergunner>  i want to see a big red button one day that
read "push here to understand women"
<cccnnn> hammer: yeah that's the withdraw cash button on the
ATM machine.

#545495

Score: 539

[GmJ] some idiot made a iso of 2 more isos
[GmJ] so when I burned it
[GmJ] there are 2 isos on the cd

#545197

Score: 1025

<Papa_Trousers> you ever think the guys who invented the word
sex spelled it that way so we could type it with our left
hands?

#544722

Score: 492

<%Justin> lol
<%Justin> I've always wanted to ask a girl for a cron job and
see what they would say.
<+Steph> probably, WTF
<%Justin> hmm
<%Justin> Steph, will you give me a cronjob.
<%Justin> Everynight @ 2

#544637

Score: 2436

MasterKayin: Dude, those Kamakazi pilots in WW2 were crazy...
MasterKayin: If they threw me in a plane and told me to go
crash into something
MasterKayin: I'd just take off and go somewhere else
MasterKayin: Like on vacation or something along those lines
MasterKayin: I'd go to Hawaii
MasterKayin: Er... wait...