<greg> I like bush, but i dont like Busch or Bush.

<ZXTPKNNOBBBSSCS> rosy palm pilots?

<friction> hey hey.
<Turbovec> yo yo yo flapjack
<friction> i... don't know what that means.
<Turbovec> its raper talk, you're not supposed to understand
dawg ;-)
<FlipTopBox> Turbovec: i believe you either mean "rapper" or
"rapist".  considering the context, i'm supposing the first.

<null> glasnost: what version of the internet did you install?
/
<glasnost> null: 5.0

<glasnost> i just talked to some girls on this hall.
<glasnost> they're like, female and stuff.

<glasnost> i didn't have a life.
<glasnost> i had a BBS.

<dh> man irc is a waste of time...i should go play quake or
something...

<glasnost> 1040 ez e
<glasnost> peace to all my bruvas at the iRS

<skynxnex> let's call it "Glasnosat's and Skynxnex's Rockingly
good Web Broswer with a Cool name"
<skynxnex> or Gasrgwbwacn for short.

<Dominitus> I meant what i said, you need a diagram giving you
the proper strategy
<Mr_Fish> ON HOW TO MASTURBATE/
<Mr_Fish> ...
<[SA]mr_box> yes
<[SA]mr_box> lol
<Mr_Fish> i've already looked for instructions on the net.

<eric> ...whered #goatsex go?
<PyroP> hell.
<eric> mommy, where do cheerleaders come from?
<PyroP> hell.
<eric> ...whats lleh backwards?
<LdySaphyre> cheerleader.

<rayena> Oh great.. I'm covered with salad again
<michael> Lesbian salad wrestling, on the next Jerry Springer

<CapnKev> Nothing's illegal when you're dead.
<Satrina> "dead girls don't say no"

<Nelson> duh; try not to make getting blown the entire meaning
of your existance

<Ibrahim> mike should work for tech support
<Ibrahim> not any company in particular, just tech support in
genreal
<michael> Ibrahim, That seems like a good idea in theory. But
take into account my acute lack of patience.
<Ibrahim> that's the point.
<Ibrahim> we record all calls, video tape you, and sell it as
comedy things.
<michael> Mmmm...no.
<Ibrahim> you'd make plenty of money.
<michael> Mmmm...no.
<Ibrahim> Free Donuts.
<michael> Mmmm...no.
<Ibrahim> how about your choice of 20 nude women at your beck
and call carrying large tropical drinks.
<Ibrahim> actually, we could make more money with said 20
women and the video.
<michael> How about we combine all of them?
<Ibrahim> a comedy about 20 nude women with donuts and large
tropical drinks?
<LdySaphyre> I want the video of Ib trying to talk twenty
women into being michael's nude servants.
<michael> Ibrahim, No. A comedy about 20 nude women seducing
me and offering me large tropical drinks while I try to
perform my duties as a tech support person :P
<Ibrahim> now THERE is a video!

<psichan> nipple rings remind me of giant castle doors
<psichan> whenever I see someone showing off nipple rings, I
want to reach out and yank on them, screaming "SANCTUARY!"

<piman> DAMMIT NETSCAPE!
<piman> DO NOT FREEZE WHEN MY MOTHER WALKS IN AND I AM LOOKING
AT PORN!

<MenTaLguY> You know, the trouble with cocaine is that the
"...but I didn't inhale" excuse doesn't work

<zed> I LIKE BREAD AND BUTTER I LIKE TOAST AND JAM SOMETHING
SOMETHING SOMETHING SOMETHING AND THATS WHY I LIKE CRACK
<zed> IIIII LOVE CRACK
<zed> FROM MY HEAD DOWN TO MY BACK
<zed> ALMOST AS MUCH AS IIIIIII LOVE EGGS
<zed> FROM MY HEAD DOWN TO MY LEGS
<zed> BUT I DONT REALLY LOVE EGGS
<zed> WELL, I LOVE THEM, BUT IN THE WAY A MAN WOULD LOVE A
FINE CUBAN CIGAR
<Nelson> zed; wtf song is that?
<zed> Nelson, IT'S EGG PROPAGANDA MUSIC

<piman> Lindz: Does Ricky Martin scare you too?
<piman> Based on the way he dances, I think he's Steve
Ballmer's long lost twin...

<piman> RVD: Whereas the amount of people watching wrestling
grows, oddly enough, at the same rate as the people who are
3rd generation welfare recipients.

<Satrina> and no, that's my friend Marissa The Nympho Elf :P
<Satrina> we put the Ho in Nympho

<Uriel> crackhead is driving at 60 MPH and talking to the
seats. A stoner is driving at 6 MPH and munching on the seats
<piman> How fast will they be going in 2 hours when they hit?
<pvx> 0 mph. Dammed elephant crossings..

<aer> I don't like pamela anderson type breasts
<xf> Their remote controls are annoying and not well
documented.

<pvx> alright, ive come up with a good description.. it looks
like snot that was soaked in cum, rolled around in encheladas,
and put in a freezer for an hour.

<pvx> why do these psycho's always msg my bot?
<xf> Because that is what psychos do.
<MenTaLguY> more to the point, why do a majority of them seem
to be from Brazil?
<xf> Because that is where psychos live.

<CapnKev> btw, chicks really dig a man with a palmpilot.
<goosedaemon> really?
<piman> Yeah. Do they politely excuse themselves rather than
blatently run away?

<AaronSw> To prevent this day from getting worse, I'll just
read ERROR as GOOD THING

<Toen> OH NO! A steamroller comes barreling down on brentai!
He must roll 1d20! Less than 6 escapes death!
<Toen> unless he wants to use up his luck charm and make it a
1d10!
<Brentai> I use my raping skill to rape the steamroller.
<Toen> your rape is ineffective against the cold, solid steel!
<Brentai> Well, crud.
<Brentai> 1d10
<Dildice> Brentai: 9
<Brentai> Er, 1d20.
<Brentai> 1d20
<Dildice> Brentai: 14
<Brentai> Crap, and crap.
<Toen> squish
<Brentai> Well, I went out trying to rape a steamroller.  It's
a man's death.

<sbp> oh, I just remembered something
<Morbus> no, i already dropped your underwear in the mail.

<NalezWork> aaw fuck
<NalezWork> I just did a rm -rf blah * instead of a rm -rf
blah &

<dawgs> I got virgins who got a pimp? /msg me

<fagg0t> I need no ignore list...I'm quite capable of ignoring
people with my BRAIN

<RazorX> tired of hearing my 200 pound upstairs neighbor walk
<chemdog> hey, I'm 200 lbs!
<RazorX> so is she
<chemdog> doh!
<FS_Falcon_GA> Raxoz you haven't tried to hit it yet?
<RazorX> no ive heard it getting hit.... i think it hits back
<FS_Falcon_GA> Man we didn't get you drunk enough yet. I'll
have to work on that
<RazorX> not enough beer in the world my man

<sal> how to best explain the need for distributed systems to
management? redundancy?
<Morbus> bodies.
<Morbus> think about it: if you bury a single body in one
place, when the police find it, you're screwed.
<Morbus> but cut a body up and bury it all over the place, and
you're maximizing your potential.
<sal> yeah im sure that'll hit close enough to home

<_Tenchi_> jwzrd-: are you a pole smoker too ?
<jwzrd-> _Tenchi_: why, you want your pole smoked ?

[Topic    ] Synoptica changes topic to '[ madwoota != sober ]'
[madwoota ] since i have only to quote 2 lines from a .log
file to change all your opinions, wonder hwat i couljd get
insteae

<rick_rizzy> dude how's this for a horror story
<rick_rizzy> i just ate a hershey's kiss
<rick_rizzy> but sort of half choked on it
<rick_rizzy> some of it got caught in my throat
<rick_rizzy> so i was all snorting and trying to cough it up
<rick_rizzy> and now it's all up in my upper throat and nasal
passage
<rick_rizzy> I'M IN HELL

(Pills) "You've got a low IQ" (new signon to AOL sound)

<Bad-Co> Next time your having a bad day, think of this...
Your a siamese twin, your brother is gay and your not. But you
only got one arsehole.

<Spectra> hrm.  Optus are going to start charging me >= $10
more per month, because "we listened to feedback from our
customers".
<Spectra> I'm fascinated which customers said "we want to pay
more for your service".

<Guest11734> Hello! I can redirect all your bot op request,
even BETWEEN
networks. Just type /msg Guest11734 op [botnick] [channel]
[password],
and I'll fix it for you!

*** ChanServ sets mode: +o Nova_Zion
*** ChanServ sets mode: +o Nova_Zion
TwistedSlinky: See.  Channy *really* likes you.  But watch
out.  Now that's he's opped you twice, he's gonna expect you
to put out.

Abyss: i deeply resent the use of the term 'purity' in any
context with 'The Brothers Drunk.'  :)
Phil: Oh I dunno.  The purity of the alcohol is an important
concept...
Dex: Yup, anything filtered through that many kidneys is going
to have to be pure.

Brucha: I've heard a Kirk/Spock/Scotty slash done similarily. 
It haunts my nightmares, I don't need a wrestling equivalent
added.  :)  "The Vulcan emotion is strong and powerful...I, I
can't contain it all..."  "You get that thing away from him!"
Jim Smith: So, Kirk and Spock had an orgy and didn't invite
Bones?  I mean, who's gonna give you more gay sex
satisfaction?  A Scotsman?  Or a guy named "Bones"?
Brucha: Something like that...  Scotty stumbles upon them,
tries to break it up, and then falls to the passion...
Jim Smith: He's such a slut...
TangleToy: *wipes off screen*  I swear.  Why I bother trying
to drink anything while in here is beyond me.

* BrooKiki is NOT a bad person.
BrooKiki: I'm not even a mean person.  In fact, if people like
that were drowned at birth like they SHOULD be, I'd be Miss
Freaking Congeniality, dammit!

* Brooke just adores the way you people try to worm out of
stuff.  <G>  "Could you explain it to Brooke?"  "I'd love to,
but I'm right in the middle of chewing my hand off."

Brooke: If I don't get a manicure, I'm going to stick my hands
in the garbage disposal.
Lynxie: YOU CANNOT WRITE WITH NO HANDS!  I DON'T WANT TO WAIT
'TIL YOU LEARN TO TYPE WITH YOUR NOSE!!!!

* araignee doesn't care for DiCaprio.  He's not to her taste.
Rapunzel452: He used to be able to act.  Then he decided he
didn't need to anymore.  I have little respect for an actor
who lets himself get upstaged by a ship.
hetros: I believe his enormous head, while an religious object
in New Guinea, scares some folk.

* AlecWire fires a crossbow dart through the arrow, landing it
in Foe's crotch.
Foenix: HA!  Joke's on you!  I had no plans to use that for
years!