<megaHAL> CHESS IS A FUN SPORT, WHEN PLAYED WITH SHOT GUNS.

<DanSTC> Delusion, will you have my baby?
<Delusion> Dan:  Yes, if it's cooked well.

<Naivete> god, this shit is so much more efficient than
windows
<Naivete> linux kernel=1 file
<Naivete> windows kernel=2/3 of your total ram, NO MATTER HOW
MUCH OF THAT RAM THERE IS.

<Neep> I'm still wondering what the exact definition of
illegal pron is.
<Rasputin> children
<Sbot> children are VERY expensive

<Prior_Tuck> We had a real Pron king at eaton though. He wad a
30 gig HD full of pron. He requests a new Hard Drive. We
suspected he was downloading. He refused to give us his PC,
but we insisted to take it...to install the new drive. I took
his ten times embedded folder and clicked delete. Put the
harddrive in my PC and gave hi his PC back. I told him his
cache was full. hes got plenty of room

<Prior_Tuck> I got a guy busted during my year at eaton. he
had 6 gigs of "illegal" pron, as wel as 15 gigs of legal pron.
I turned his PC to my boss..where my boss called the police.
<CrashCat> so did he have the pr0n put into two directories,
'legal' and 'illegal'? :P
<Prior_Tuck> yes he did actually
<Prior_Tuck> he had his word docs folder and his powerpoint
folder

* Rasputin found a student's share open on the network of 2.35
gigs of PR0n
<Rasputin> plus various movies and other crap
<Neep> Are you going to admin his ass or download it all?
<Rasputin> both, Neep. Both. :)
<Prior_Tuck> yes...but it could be illegal.
<Rasputin> What's illegal? I'm archving for possible
er...administrative purposes

<Grant|BnW> Have you seen what happens if you give the
mariners a sheep?
<CrashCat> lots of uses
<Grant|BnW> "A sheep. Lovely! Sheep have many uses, and the
voyage is long."
<CrashCat> try giving them a woman
<Grant|BnW> What do they say?
<Grant|BnW> I'm trying to be nice now, so I don't want to if
they'll rape or eat her.
<Grant|BnW> I wouldn't put anything past fucking accordian
players.

<Rasputin> eiiiiidle eidle eee
<Rasputin> eiiiidle eidle eee
<Rasputin> we won't be leavin' til we get some pus-sy sooooooo
<CrashCat> i'm not complainin' but shut up or I'll beat your
brain in

<Darkz> Can't get drunk, work soon
<Delusion> Your priorities disgust me.

<Kash> BW has eveyone catassing
<CrashCat> that's leopardassing to you
<Kranrev> tigerassing
<Rasputin> I'm monkeyassing! :)
<Mako> just one ass? it is of no use to me.

<Madman> Rodents Of Unusual Size....I don't think they exist
<CrashCat> rodents?
<CrashCat> size?
<Sbot> size is irrelevent. It's a question of methodology.
<Madman> haha
<CrashCat> ...

*** Mezoth|work was kicked by Avie_work (the last guy that
said, "I think you know what I want" to me ended up in the
hospital. FOR SIX MONTHS.)

<Kash> MY BUM IS ON YOUR FACE
<Kash> MY BUM IS ON YOUR FACE
<Kash> LOOK AT ME
<Kash> MY BUM IS ON YOUR FACE
*** Kash was kicked by da_slog (ITS NOT VERY PHUN)
<CrashCat> MY FOOT IS ON YOUR BUM

<Dracleath> Dual wielding great swords with monkey grip
<Staberinde> I have a monkeygrip
<Staberinde> they won't let me use it in public though

<Chum> I told them I was a 16 year old female that would put
out if given a beta account.
<da_slog> NOOOOOOOOOOOO
<Kash> yea, i'm going to be female to

<Grant> Hey, you know what the biggest problem with all
current MMOGs is?
<Mako> insufficient boobage
<Grant> That too.

<Spamizbad> minix is the baddass hardcore 16bit unix from the
rough side of town

<AgentAce1> hmm
<AgentAce1> well that's interesting
<AgentAce1> actually...that's fuckin weird ass shit

<Philly_B> <--------->
<Philly_B> hmm...
<Philly_B> the set of all real numbers
(*michael) The set of all real numbers, now only $99.99! Order
now and get a complimentary imaginary number commemorative
plate free with your order.

<HowLeTT> if my back seat smells like pussy tomorrow, im going
to be furious
<HowLeTT> seriously

* *@michael decides that given two evils, x and y, where x=
cherry jolly ranchers and y=apple jolly ranchers, y<x

<@AgentAce> and I'm gonna get a pair of those new female shoes
<@AgentAce> because they got soul
<@AgentAce> err sole

<PyroP> My sister has freinds over. They're banging the piano.
<piman> PyroP, Uh...
<aer> I see..
<PyroP> ^banging^banging on

<@Spider124> Gay ass homo, as opposed to "Hetero Ass homo"

(@sno) Emacs can mow down forests too. But it mows down
forests with the passing of its fat, bloated ass.

(goosedaemon) someone define "talking out of [a] ass"
(Leper_Mess) goose; you know.. get a donkey, and speak without
moving your lips so it looks like the donkey's talking.

(Deathwing) I get to see a concert tomorrow, so there
(Lanfear) what concert?
(Deathwing) some guy who plays guitar for commercials
(zed) Wow, some guy who plays guitar for commercials.
(Deathwing) zed, he's one of the most famous guitarist in the
world, actually
(Deathwing) up there with Joe Satriani, among others
(Lanfear) that's why you call him 'some guy'?

<Rain|BW> sbot jesus
<Sbot> Jesus Saves! But Gretzky Rebounds, He Shoots, He
Scores!
<Rain|BW> tee-hee-hee
<CrashCat> jesus saves souls and redeems them for valuable
prizes at the ticket counter
<gegi> Jesus saves, the rest of you take 5d20 damage.

<Joe_> What is the idea behind Black % White?
<Kash> Joe, it's CAtz with better AI, and villagers
<Joe_> So, a gigapet with a surrounding town?
<Kash> yea
<Kash> pretty damn fun
<Joe_> They scrapped UO2 for pokemon.

<Kyle|> I AM THE MOST STRONGER PROGRAMMING MEN IN THE
WORLD!!!!!

<Madman> woohoo!
<Madman> made it thru the 3rd level!
<CrashCat> gratz
<CrashCat> before you know it you'll be done and saying 'this
game sux, it's too short' and taking it back to the store

<CrashCat> I could never place a personal ad.  I would live on
p0rn and irc before I got that far.  oh wait

<Kash> Biee, my modem cost me 8 bucks
<Bieeardo> Holy shit.  That's... oy.
<Kash> IT IS A CURCUIT BOARD AND A BELL
<Kash> circuit
<Kash> lol
<Bieeardo> Oh, so it's a hard-coded version of EQ?

<Naivete> I wouldn't be surprised if xrg is down for good.
<Soul|gone> it has been 24 hours.
<Soul|gone> that is a pretty good indication that it went bye
bye
<Naivete> that would make me rather sad.
<Naivete> not all that sad, mind you.
<Naivete> but still pretty sad.
<Damarr> Just sad enough to make you feel sad
<Naivete> exactly

<JanetBabe> love is the answer
<Weather> What was the question?
<DulRiff> what is 6 times 9?
<JanetBabe> how many angels can fuck on the head of a pin?

<slog> Is Susan Sarandon too old to be considered "dooable"?
<Joe_> Yes.
<Kiler> I'd still do her
<Rain|Joker> She's borderline
<slog> that's 1 yes, 1 no, 1 maybe
<Pander> Desperation is the key factor.
<Kranrev> I'd say yes, but it would be creepy
<Lum_> Ben Franklin said of older women: "They know what they
are doing, and they are eternally grateful".
<Lum_> in case you don't know your history Franklin was pretty
much a slutpuppy

<DocWebstr> Okay... a couple of things before I very literally
go pass out....
<Mycroft> If it's about Soylent Green, we already know. :)

<Einer> Charging for porn is like caging a beautiful unicorn
in a deep, dark dungeon.

<gegi> same reason people look down on you if you're into BDSM
but prefer the man to be the dom
<Naivete> people look down on that?
<Naivete> why?
<Nicademus> cause the girl is tied to the floor duh
<Nicademus> kinda hard to look up at her

<Joe_> I got arrested by a school poice officer.
<Joe_> Up until I was sitting in Juvi for a couple hours, I
was being illegaly detained.
<Joe_> Heh.. last time I try to ditch school to take a shit.
<Joe_> From now on, I'm shitting in my locker. Let them find
THAT the next time they do a random search.
<Joe_> I can see it now. A stare down. Me, with my pants down.
The cop, nose covered, gun drawn.

<Staberinde> What I'm wondering is why the ACLU isn't bringing
lawsuits against these schools that suspend kids for drawings
or writings. I mean if that's not depriving someone of their
freedom of speech I don't know what is.
<Joe_> Because the Supreme Court ruled that the constitution
doesn't extend to schools.
<Staberinde> That means my old high school can secede from the
union then, right?
<Joe_> It could work..

<Joe_> The word "gun" has been replaced with "Poppinfresh
Poke" in all of the history books. Didn't they cover that on
the news?
<Joe_> Lemme get my book
<Joe_> The M-1A, the standar issue Poppinfresh Poke up until
the Korean Thumbwrestle.
<Joe_> Then, at the advent of the Vietman Squardance, the new
standard issue Poppinfresh Poke was a modified version of the
old, named the M16a, or as the soldiers called it: "Hoo hoo!"

<anarch> i should put some pants on and go check my mail
<Burimpu> or you could do it without pants

<Naivete> the Christian Culture Club scheduled Jesus Day
<Naivete> and the Gay Culture Club scheduled Gay Day on the
same day
*** Naivete was kicked by Kash (...)
<Naivete> and harassed the christians.

<Ein|sk00l> Goddammit.
<Ein|sk00l> Is it too much to ask for ONE hot shower a week?
<Staberinde> Yes
<Staberinde> But then I live in California
<Staberinde> Where its too much to ask for electricity at
least once a week

<skatoni> will some one please help
<shev> ya?
<skatoni> there is a guy hacking into my computer
<shev> unplug your modem
<skatoni> how?
<shev> see those wires behind your computer?
<shev> rip'em all out
*** skatoni has quit IRC (Read error to skatoni
[ppp012.rosenet.net]: Connection reset by peer)

<Staberinde> The worst of the bunch was this
* Staberinde points at his crotch
<Staberinde> "Ya know this thing isn't going to blow itself!"
<CrashCat> it will if you wire it with explosives
<Staberinde> Well yes, but that's only when the zombies are
near

<Lazarus> Anyone care to guess my sign?
<DocWebstr> "Keep Off"?
<Lazarus> Wrong Way.
<Beki> this end up? :)
<K`shandra> "Thank You - Come Again." ;-)

<Dracleath> You know, its disturbing how much the frosting for
dominos cinnamon sticks looks like semen