<ODD> optimism is having a ups on a win95 box

<newkid99> Whats everyone reading today
<Wed> The screen

<CyberPunkWanabe> I broke my new stereo that I got after
christmas cause I broke the one I got for christmas..
<CyberPunkWanabe> I shouldnt be allowed within 10 ft of
electronics

<ding0> ahahahahaahahahahah i was just taking a huge piss and
my mom says from behind me "wow jack! your getting big", i was
like, OH MY GOD wtf, and then i finished and turned around and
she was looking at the size on my shoes, whew!!

<josh> I was on this conf one time and they were doing 3way
calling to prank call grocery stores, and this chick would ask
if they had keilbasa, then ask if it would be good for
'experimenting" with
<josh> this one guy was like "yeah, it'd work good for that"

<josh> usually when guys shoow me their penises I try and
fondle them
<penney> whoa josh
<penney> are you gay?
<josh> no, I'm just friendly

<jc> I want photos!
<succubus> jc, i want doesnt get
<jc> I want photos PLEASE!

<@helloraj> if ya rape a positute would u get arrested for
stealing?

<ProFessional_Widow> i have back stage asses
<ProFessional_Widow> passes

<Trog> I pity the english
* Yarn smacks trog
<Trog> they go to all the trouble inventing all these sports..
and then they turn out to SUCK ASS at them

<dav^> uncola: man im in big fuckin trouble
<dav^> uncola: help
<uncola> dav^: what did you do?
<dav^> i haxed my schools web page and i accidentally used my
friends login/pass
<dav^> and they fucking looked at the log, bastards
<uncola> haha

<pms> If you spot a minority in your gated community who is
not holding a leafblower or other lawn-care device, call your
local police immediately.

<pms> Three Baby Boomers are still missing following Friday's
collapse of a massive Jenga tower in this Atlanta suburb.

<mynx> hahaha i had a construction worker holler at me today
<Wurzle> he said "YOU FUCKING HOMO GET AWAY FROM MY BUIDING
SITE!"

<k8_fan> I have this nightmare that I die suddenly...and
everyone I know starts looking through my browser cache.
* Hogie-One has that same dream!

<Goldenstimme1> 46 M lonely, self-employed, employed myself
earlier this evening

<PUTZINGoff> Does a kid wake up one day and say Mommy/Daddy I
want to grow up to be a PROCTOLOGIST!!!!!

<Snoopen_Man> who wants to be nuked?
<jeffx> me!
<dedsmurf> i have already been nuked, my microwave is one of
the first models made, it's leaking i think

<WinTek> whats a good efnet server?
<Julie2> thats an oxymoron
<ToidyMan> WinTek, good and efnet don't belong in the same
sentence
<F`Nar> they don't belong on the same internet

*** Foxers has quit IRC (If idiots could fly,Dalnet would be
an airport.)

<Tajador>  I'm a pseudomasochist, pretend to spank me

<_git_> hey folks, what does @ mean in front of someones nick?
<thorn``> The @ symbol identify's the channel operators..
Chops have extra commands for control of the room
<_git_> does it mean that persons is a sad wanker who spends
his life on irc, has no real friends, and prefers to chat on
here than in a pub?

<Targaff> MUD = fighting and stuff, MUSH = sitting around
getting collectively high ovr a net connection

* Racked recalls the past: my teacher said, "I have a 10-foot
snake here"....to which I replied, "oh no you don't....snakes
don't have feet!"
* GPF recalls saying something like that to a teacher and
getting detention

<boomer> mount rushmore, contrary to popular opinion, did not
grow that way

<Expresso> I don't play alot of first persons hooters

<Dynamo> [Destiny's Child - Say My Name.mp3]-[4.34mb/4m 30s]
<Dynamo> [Pet Music - 04 - Warm Hugs.mp3]-[5.23mb/5m 26s]
<Dynamo> No one saw Destiny's Child, or Pet Music, aight?
<Dynamo> [Destiny's Child - Independent Woman Part 1.mp3]-
[3.6mb/3m 44s]
<Dynamo> [Pet Music - 08 - Chasing Clouds.mp3]-[4.4mb/4m 35s]
<Dynamo> This PC must hate me.

Chargon[HorsebackArchery] is now known as Sir_Chargon    
<Eric> Horseback Archery.
<Eric> D00d, drive-by shooting. It's a sign of the times.
<Kataclysm> Yes, but  a ride-by shooting just doesn't have the
same effect as a drive-by. 
<Eric> Good point. ANYONE can kill a horse, but a car doesn't
stagger when it's down.
<Kataclysm> That, and horses don't have tinted power windows
either.

<dbaker> Whoever thinks rc5-64 will be cracked in 50 years is
an idiot.
<dbaker> It'll be cracked before the end of 1998.

<Fiction> man, I LOVE Sigue Sigue Sputnik so MUCH!!!!
<Fiction> they're almost as good as Catholic Discipline
<MaCk> then why don't you marry it
<Fiction> cause I want to marry you, Mack
<MaCk> ewh
<[enki]> I think you had that one coming, Mack.
<[enki]> Besides, I told you he'd get the wrong impression if
you sent him those chocolates.
* Fiction makes moon eyes at mack
* [enki] shakes his head.
<[enki]> I knew this would happen.
* Fiction writes bad poetry about his love for mack
* [enki] preps the firehose.
* Fiction buys a harley and a tshirt that says: "if you can
read this, Mack fell off" on the back
<Fiction> someday I'll buy you a cubic-zirconium ring and we
can move to a trailer in Rock Springs Wyoming
<Fiction> we'll be so happy!
<[enki]> And you'll drive a 78 Camaro to work.
<Fiction> YEAH!
<Fiction> only "work" is hanging out at the local high school
selling crank to teenagers
<MaCk> SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ALL OF YOU JUST SHUT
UP!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
<MaCk> someone is going to die
<Fiction> and mack can learn how to make casseroles with
potato chips in them
<[enki]> And get denim fringe jackets.
<Fiction> and we'll drink coors
<MaCk> I hate you guys
<Fiction> cheer up, I'll get some real wood panelling to put
up in our trailer
<Fiction> or at least I'll tell you it's real
<Fiction> and we'll live on food stamps but have 300 channels
of DirectTV
<MaCk> I hate you all
<Fiction> c'mon baby, you're hot with a capital HO!
<[enki]> LOL
*** MaCk has quit IRC

<Tre`> I've got to find away to earn some dough
<bishoptl> sell some sperm. that's legal in the States, isn't
it?
<bishoptl> or plasma - that should free up some $$$
<SHD> he's too young for selling sperm
<Tre`> I need *a bunch*
<bishoptl> sell your friends' sperm
<Tre`> that's just disgusting
<bishoptl> how badly do you want NWN
<bishoptl> I'm not saying you have to go milk them yourself
<bishoptl> just pass around the tupperware container

<BlznAzn> i find it kinky to use my cock as a probe tool to
remove lint between the toes of a foot thats been inside a
work boot all day
<pagan> you must like to have Athlete's Cock

* TT205 wants to build a SNOT-HIPPO!!!!
<TT205> *blink*
* TT205 wants to build a SNOW-HIPPO!!!!

<zork> man sun fsck scares me
<zork> EVERYTHING IS IN CAPS AND TRUNCATED
<zork> OR SALVAGED
<zork> WRONG IN SUPERBLK
<zork> etc etc
<phrog> U R SKRWD
<zork> BUY A NEW DRV NOW
<shodan> WRNG FREE BLK CNT IN SPRBLK DOOD LOL
<zork> L@@K R@RE ERROR, ROFL

<FatElvis> The only that comes from Texas are steers and...
<josh> ... Jews?

<kitten> Dan, you're my honey bunch sugar plum,
pumpy-umpy-upmkin.
<kitten> You're my sweetie pie.
<Danelope> Oh yeah?  Well, you're my cuppycake gumdrop
snickums-snookums.
<Danelope> You're the apple of my eye.
<ry4n> fuck you guys.
*** ry4n has quit IRC (Quit: Trillian (http://
www.ceruleanstudios.com))
<Danelope> Hahaha.

<alex> I'll beat you 'til you have your Native American vision

<alex> I have this great method of watching someone through
the crook of my arm that I developed when I was in grade
school so I could look at pretty girls with my head down on my
desk

<alex> well with the intel pentium III processor enhancing the
web as it is, who knows

<coulson> Check this quote :) "<n|ghtOUT> my gf can smoke
cigarettes with her pussy"
<BiOHaZd> She must taste like an ashtray

*** Now talking in #tZrhj26trDS4yurgrCNR4eyd
*** Topic is 'The Only Channel With A Name Created By
Head-Butting The Keyboard'

<Electric> Jester says he's gonna rub deep heat into my
bollocks at 4AM
<AdmV0rl0n> does he now....
<Electric> But when he goes back to bed, he'll still smell the
fart I did there earlier :)

<qik> ur at school?
<De-Gen> yer
<qik> LOOK TEACHER IT SAYS CUNT ON THE SCREEN!
*** De-Gen has quit IRC

<enrol> my new ircing technique is unstoppable
<jj> do you think youre dalnet sword can defeat me!?
<jj> en guard, ill let you try my efnet style

<enrol> pure fucking godfather of IDM
<jj_> whats IDM
<jj_> is it
<jj_> INTENSIVE DICK MAINTENANCE
<enrol> intelligent dance music
<jj_> oh
<jj_> close enough

<enrol> PERISCOPE UP, BITCH DOWN
<spikoh> thats a dilbert phrase isnt it ?

<o0o> i had 5 days of smoking the sickest shit
<meiso> dog turds?

(@TRCC|shot): directX 8.1 any good?
(@landje): i havnet pld it
(@ui|ICEMAN): dirext X isn't a game
(@landje): what is it
(@landje): if any;one puts that in their quit message i'll
feckign kil ythe,

<arfer> sticks and stones may break my bones but life
contingencies and statistics are pure shit

<LR|Midnight> this ice cream owns
<[ice]> omfg
<[ice]> this Midnight cream 0wns