* Uther has joined #Elicoor
<Uther> bah!
<Uther> fucking disconnected my ass
<Lucca> Wow, if you take that to be an actual,
grammatically-correct sentence, it's really rather wrong.

<GreenGoblin> Ponyprincess, get ur brain checked!
<PonyPrincess> oh ya? well i did and they found nothing!
<PonyPrincess> wait, crap

<Eir|food> Y'know, Taco Bell's "Think Outside The Bun" seems
perfect for a hilarious anti-gay slogan.
<Eir|food> "Don't put your meat between buns!  Get it in a
taco instead!"

<TMX> someone right a shell extension for windows xp
<TMX> *write
<Cow> for what?
<TMX> stfu button
<Cow> i'm gonna make a command line program to buy stuff from
amazon
<TMX> equivalent tokilling a process via ctrl-alt-delete
<TMX> For retarded programs like norton that just have an "ok"
button when they ask to reboot
<TMX> +----------------------------------------+
<TMX> |& M$ Piss-me-off XP            |_|| ||X||
<TMX> +----------------------------------------+
<TMX> | Your computer needs to be rebooted in  |
<TMX> | order to apply the updates.            |
<TMX> |                                        |
<TMX> | Save your work, and then click ok.     |
<TMX> |                                        |
<TMX> |       +----------+ +----------+        |
<TMX> |       |   OK     | |   STFU   |        |
<TMX> |       +----------+ +----------+        |
<TMX> +----------------------------------------+

JDR-TSS: I know you're out there. I can feel you now. I know
that you're afraid... you're afraid of unrestricted internet
access. You're afraid of not being fed content to you like AOL
does. I don't know the future. I didn't come here to tell you
how this is going to end. I came here to tell you how it's
going to begin. I'm going to hang up this phone, and then I'm
going to show you customers what you don't want to see. I'm
going to show you an intarwebs without holding your hand. An
intarwebs without netnannies and content filters, without
borders or boundaries. An intarwebs where anything is
possible. Where we go from there is a choice I leave to you.
BBuie-TSS: you really dont have a life do you?
JDR-TSS: There is no life.

<starshipparsley> This is a beautiful equation.
<starshipparsley> e^pi( i ) + 1 = 0
<purple.toupee> omg that just blew my mind
<starshipparsley> I am reading the Penguin Dictionary of
Curious and Interesting Numbers right now, and it is
nerdgasmic
<starshipparsley> Did you know that pi/2 is 1/root(root2 +
root(root 2 +root(root 2 +....)
<purple.toupee> !!!!
<starshipparsley> This kinda stuff is so freaking awesome!
<purple.toupee> math = power
<purple.toupee> math is knowledge, knowledge is power, power
corrupts, therefore math corrupts
<starshipparsley> Math = the only kind of sexual pleasure I'll
probably ever have

<komies> It got dead in here.
<komies> Riech, tell me a story.
<Shish> make it have pirates in it!
<Riech> Five pirates and one woman wash up on a desert island
after a shipwreck.
<Riech> Before long they are all getting pretty horny so they
all make a deal.
<Riech> Each pirate will marry the woman for one week at a
time, at which point the next pirate in line will marry her
and so on.
<komies> Five pirates and one woman? Seems like my kind of
island.
<Riech> All the pirates get sex every five weeks and the woman
gets sex as often as she wants with a different pirate each
week.
<Riech> The situation works wonderfully for five years. When
the woman suddenly dies...
<Riech> The first week after wasn't too bad.
<Riech> The second week was getting sort of bad.
<Riech> The third week was getting pretty bad.
<Riech> The fourth week was really bad.
<Riech> The fifth week was horrible!
<Riech> By the sixth week it was unbearable...
<Riech> ...
<Riech> ...
<Riech> So they buried her.

[Sam] Damnit, no sex for me tonight.
[Ven] In the doghouse?
[Sam] No, she has roommates and I have roommates, but she was
supposed to go to her sisters tonight to babysit and I was
going to go over after the kid went to sleep. He's like 1 and
a half so he sleeps at like 7.
[Ven] So what's the problem?
[Sam] Her sister cancelled cause of the crappy weather.
[Nat has joined the chat 19:12]
[Sam] So no sister so no sex for me.
[Nat] You're all such sick fucks, I'm not coming in here
anymore.
[Nat has left the chat 19:13]
[Sam] ...

<bigboy89> hey Sexy_girll :*
<Sexy_girll> sup...
<bigboy89> are u alone?
<Sexy_girll> yep y?
<bigboy89> i just bought some condoms with like bumps and
stuff, we could try them out tomorrow when your parents are
gone
<Sexy_girll> you fuckin asshole, your fuckin my sister?
* bigboy89 has quit (Connection reset by peer)

<3M> ok guys i've finally got my windows me machine up and
running again :D
<exo147> if everything seems to be running well on windows me
you've obviously overlooked something....
<3M> who is general failure and why is he reading my hard disc
:(
<exo147> somehow, "i told you so" doesn't quite say it ;)

<Chad> Seriously, I should kick your nuts so hard that they
shoot to the roof of your mouth
<Chad> That should be a familiar taste for you!

<McKain> in psychology
<McKain> we were discussing sleep
<McKain> and the blind kid with bad hearing asks
<McKain> "I heard that if you are dreaming and falling, and
you hit the ground, you die for real"
<McKain> and my professor immediately says "Yes. You die."
<McKain> I LOL'd so hard
<McKain> then someone else asks
<McKain> "I hear that if you have a nightmare in which you
die, you die for real"
<McKain> and he goes "No, that's complete rubbish"
<McKain> I wanted to ask "I hear if you are dreaming that you
are battling zombies and you get bitten, you will wake up and
be a zombie. True or false, Professor? TRUE OR FALSE?!"

<JimLad> night War_Pig
<JimLad> you cockjockey
<War_Pig> pardon?
<Trippledence> he said you ride cock War_Pig
<joeh> hes saying you ride cock War_Pig
<[Marcus]> he said you ride cock War_Pig

<Yoggit> No, it sucks, there's all these little kids, and they
always try to talk to me.
<leeberace> i like kids
<Yoggit> I like kids, when they're being quiet and not moving.
<leeberace> those are dead kids
<leeberace> that doesn't really count

Gigs|  spammers need to get thier shit straight
Gigs| "horny mom getting it for the first time"

* Now talking in #schizophrenia
* Topic is 'Welcome to chat for suffers and family and friends
affected by schizophrenia - a brain disease.'
* Set by para on Tue Nov 14 18:00:23
<CaffeineBoy> hey
<CaffeineBoy> so... do you guys make individual usernames for
your multiple personalities?

<Werdnum> if (nickj.nationality == "au") { nickj.print("Yes");
} else { nickj.print("No"); }
<nickj> "yes" and "no" - dual Aus / Uk (born Edinburgh)
<Werdnum> nickj: I'm pretty sure that's a non-standard parser
;)
<nickj> hey, I deliberately try and put down answers that I
know will confuse the system when filling in forms, so why
should this be any different? ;-)
<Werdnum> nickj: SQL injection on the census?
<Werdnum> Name: Andrew'; DROP TABLE person;---

<coldXfire_> i need a slogan for an abortion clinic
<coldXfire_> ideas?
<p0lska> "If he doesn't pull it out, we will."

madskz: i' tried ass fuck
takefive: haha
takefive: how was it?
madskz: what??
madskz: oh shit
madskz: *i'm tired as fuck

<DropShock> He was the BIGGEST Jewish person I've ever seen.
<DropShock> Aren't they supposed to be skinny and all?
<Trevor> It's Jewbacca!

<FFD> I was just wondering where anyone could get 99 virgins
together in one place... Then I remembered IRC.

<@Vlad_The1Inhaler> fuck
<@Vlad_The1Inhaler> my cat died
<@Surtsey> LOL
<@Vlad_The1Inhaler> ...
-!- Vlad_The1Inhaler
[~joel@c-24-91-210-223.hsd1.ma.comcast.net] has left #sebo
<@Surtsey> oops

* Calydor raises an eyebrow.
<Calydor> Weren't you, y'know, banned?
<Killian> what's it look like to you? :>
<Killian> jive turkey
* Calydor checks the ban-list.
<Calydor> Looks like to me you got a different IP.
<Killian> news to me. Whaddya wanna do about it sucka? :>
* Calydor sets mode: +b *!
*@adsl-69-232-222-88.dsl.pltn13.pacbell.net
* Killian was kicked by Calydor (This.)
* Calydor coughs.
<Locandez> What a twat.
<Calydor> Yup.
*Killian* I may be banned, but you're still a furry. I'd say I
came out better in the deal :>
<Calydor> Bash.org rule #1: Don't call the guy with an @
names.

<Tom86> can i ask you a personal question?
<MoHaWk> 8 inches

<Crimson> Damnit, I have to work in 1 hr!!
<Crimson> Damn these IRc's... they steal my sleep like the
blacks steal tv's.
<BigJP> I'm black.
<Crimson> Its a plasma! Its in the den, just dont hurt my
family!

<Gig> Bah, drunk students setting off the firealarm to the
building, silent one too, so direct to the fire station. So we
had some fireman knocking on our door trying to get us out
<Gig> and my flatmate who answered the door shouted out "Hey
lads! look the stripper's here!"
<Gig> you would be surprised how fast people got out of their
rooms

A> I lost my virginity around 5 years ago.
Rice> Virgin by choice
Random> heh
Pork> Whose choice Rice?

<MightyOne> How do you circumsize a whale?
<ChubbyFrog02> Very carefully?
<MightyOne> Four skin divers.

Viki: chris.....say NO to peadophiles
Epo: um..
Epo: NO
Viki: oh fuck.. I walked into that

-!- lightman [~light@83.225.150.69] has joined #japan
<lightman> i must find a japanese wife
<lucke> google-san.

Oli: lol
Oli: my gf just won one of my ebay auctions
Oli: was supposed to be my xmas present
Oli: she didnt knew my ebay name

Kamikazefish17:  sweet.  im at work but no one is here.  yet
again
Mikelucky8:  That sucks. Also, Disney is ruining ANOTHER book
that I read as a child by making it a movie.
Kamikazefish17:  which one now?
Mikelucky8:  the Bridge to Terabithia. It's supposed to be
about some kids finding some secluded forest place and growing
attached to it like an alternate reality, but instead Disney
is skipping the symbolism and metaphor and going straight for
freaking robopirates and beavers with collanders on their
heads

<rhpot1991> Eighty percent of our young adults (according to
National Geographic) were not able to find Iraq on the map.
<formatc> oh man that's classy
<bueller> they are ahead of their time rhpot1991
<bueller> since in five years there will be no Iraq on the map

Mark1: yeh my house is emo
Mark1: it cuts its walls

poetically kyle:  my gramma's funny...we were driving behind 
a short bus and she saw all the helmets and she was like "OH
LOOK! HOCKEY PLAYERS!"

<Noobles> i'm not getting any presents
<Yolmer> uh-huh
<Ravus> you're getting a small lump of COAL
<Ravus> due to molesting small children all year
<Ravus> santa doesn t approve
<Ravus> THEMS HIS

quiet >> What's faster than a speeding bullet?
eskaypey >> chuck norris
quiet >> a Jew with a coupon.

<@Raekiel> .....just had a very blonde moment
<@Raekiel> was lighting the stove and accidentally burned
myself
<@Raekiel> and for a very brief moment
<@Raekiel> wondered why the fuck the flames were so hot, as I
had it on low....

<superrambo> (CRAZY/CUTE)-(PAST RELATIONSHIPS)+(CURRENT
OUTLOOK)-(INTELLIGENCE)=COMPATABILITY
<superrambo> IT IS THE CALLED THE "SHE'S NOT LIKE OTHER GIRLS,
TRUST ME" FORMULA
<monkeylice> love is blind
<monkeylice> lust is deaf
<superrambo> PSYCHOSIS IS OBVIOUS

<SaintAlvus> Does the name Doctor Pavlov ring a bell?

sionanomics: know anyone that knows loads about cars?
Teh Supreme Weez: Yeah.
Teh Supreme Weez: My mate Jeeves.
sionanomics: he online?
Teh Supreme Weez: Yeah.
Teh Supreme Weez: www.ask.com
sionanomics: :(

<kunk> sigh i wish i had a piece of the shuttle to sell
<kunk> i should just bust up an air conditioner
<kunk> and be like "the cooling mechinism from the space
shuttle!"

<murrrr> *bites tommah's hand off*
<murrrr> it must be pretty hard to type with only one hand
<FraudulentTommah> I won't respond to that

<DarkPaladin> You know how people don't spea properly ost of
the time?
<DarkPaladin> *most
<DarkPaladin> *speak
<Tiddles> I do now.

<frumpy> I see nintendo's new system is making people smile.
<frumpy> it's only a matter of time before a GTA ports comes
out with the title 'Now you can *really* beat that nigga up
and take his car!'
<frumpy> I'll bet is sells millions of copies while parents
everywhere just throw their hands up and say things like 'what
am I supposed to do about it?!?!'
<SForce> they'll just be happy their kids are getting some
kind of exercise
<frumpy> 'yes honey.. I know he's in there beating up
prostitutes.. but remember when he used to just _sit_ there
and do it?'

<ken> man, I got an F on my stupid test.
<Christopher> Think of it as -A, not F.

Wraith2041: Man, even soulless corporations are telling the
RIAA to shut their goddamn mouths. I'm betting soon Satan
himself will burst through the RIAA president's floor and say,
"Cease, minion. My Avril Lavigne songs are not to be trifled
with."

SyntaxError: Nanci Palosi is offically the Speaker of the
House now
GlowStickNinja: Who?
SyntaxError: Annoying bitch that marched with NAMBLA in the
Gay Rights Parade and looks like something the dog vomited up
and ate, then shit out again.
GlowStickNinja: The chick that Stephen Colbert did a hand
turkey of?
SyntaxError: Trust Colbert to bridge the gap between Politics
and Idiots

(BR4M) you take the good with the bad
(BR4M) its like with the anorexic chicks
(JuJu`) well, bad outweighs the good, so its not worth it.
(Ravenclaw) anything outweighs an anorexic chick

<Ritz> I had the myspace so I could keep in contact with
certain friends
<Ritz> I decided I needed new friends