<spd> can you be charged for not giving the money back
<EnronExec> only if you're caught

*** Malach has changed the topic on #nz to If your parents get
divorced, are they still cousins?
<lower> Shouldn't it be "If your parents get divorced, are you
still your own cousin?"
<Malach> lower - you inbreed your way, I'll inbreed mine.

<blabur93> I swear it was the most disgusting thing I've ever
seen
<Zoogle> like all male senior citizen bukkake nasty?
<blabur93> ........ no
<blabur93> but thanks, now i just imagined the most disgusting
thing ever
<Zoogle> np, anytime

<wabbit> wanna know something funny dave?
<wabbit> about nora
<wabbit> +d
<wabbit> and what the spend money on?
<wabbit> +y
* |Dave hands wabbit the manual for his keyboard.

<sieco> i still use it to play duck hunt
<ion> my nintendo went out the window after that last time I
failed to beat ganon and bring home the tri-force
<XCoyote> lol
<ion> my girlfriend was like "you fucking sissy.  if you don't
bring me home the tri-force I'm going out with Bobby next
door"
<sieco> rofl
<ion> I'm like "fuck you bitch!"  and I flung the nintendo at
her

<Praetor> i got jury duty and I was like
<Praetor> "well.. I don't believe in drug laws... i couldn't
convict someone on drug posession bc i don't believe it should
be a crime, unless he was black of course"
<Praetor> excused

<cranky-> pagan: I just catch her when she's not looking
<cranky-> I'll buy her dinner first so it's not rape
<KK-> its just buying sex then
<cranky-> what do you think marriage really is?
<cranky-> it's long term financing on a piece of ass
<_overkill> WORD

<[-FcG-]Digger> LOLOLOL, Some lady just called my cell and was
like "Hi I'd like to place an order"  So I took it!  She's
gonna be pissed when the pizza doesn't arrive.
<[-FcG-]Digger> LMAO CLASSIC
<[-FcG-]Digger> Oh man, I RULE!

<[-FcG-]Digger>  Let's all hold hands and sing...on second
thought, let's wait until Soad washes his hands.
<[-FcG-]SOAD17[-RawR-]> i don't f@p THAT much :/

<Minion> I BECAME A NUDIST SO I WOULDNT HAVE TO BROWSE THE
INTERNET FOR UNDERAGE PORN!

<+Zebz> someone should plot a graph of how much money each of
these nigerian emails is offering against time
<+Zebz> I think it's some kind of hidden message

<aNuBiS-> she humps me from behind sometimes tho
<aNuBiS-> as a joke
<aNuBiS-> when shes walking behind me
<JayWhoa> she wants to be a man
<JayWhoa> a gay man
<pagan> its all fun and games untill soemone gets their anus
poked out

<Byte> i cant find a good isp :(
<Byte> vcisp.net looked good
<Byte> but 30 hours/week...
<Byte> i use at least 56 hours
<Byte> per day

<sk8er^BzY> But i want to have Sex
<sk8er^BzY> when i press sex

<DiamonDie> why does asl matter?
<enzo_> age,sex ,location?
<DiamonDie> yes i know, i've irced since '97, but why does it
matter?
<enzo_> because i am n ot gay!
<enzo_> and i do not chat with men!

*** Topic is 'http://yellow5.com/pokey/ | I WILL ASK THIS FOX
FOR GUIDANCE'
*** Set by JoeMustDie on Tue Nov 12 18:34:04
*** Sopabuena changes topic to 'http://yellow5.com/pokey/ | I
WILL ASK THIS FOX FOR GUIDANCE 4818'
-Later-
*** Squinky changes topic to 'http://yellow5.com/pokey/ |
WISDOM SHALL BE RECEIVED'
<Sopabuena> No keep that number there
*** Sopabuena changes topic to 'http://yellow5.com/pokey/ |
WISDOM SHALL BE RECEIVED 4818'
<Squinky> What is the number?
<Sopabuena> part of a phone
<Sopabuena> i put it there or i will forget to call
<Squinky> Hee!
<Squinky> You may be addicted when you use channel topics as
reminder notes

<jkl> umm.. I felt a slight fastening of my heartbeat...
<jkl> but that coulda been cause i farted :\

<Targen> I'm using a particular method to take the gas out of
my coke that involves sinking the bottle's head somewhat
deeply into my mouth...and some of the coke was dripping out
because of a miscalculation.
<Targen> and my hand was right next to my nose
<Targen> I don't think I have to tell you what my hand smells
like
<Targen> but the point is... eww, I will never use this method
again
<Ender_Ray> thats what you get for having oral sex with a coke
bottle :

<energize> i just cant' think of anything to code
<pantherqs> code some porn
<energize> how the fuck do you code porn?
<Linkadmin> haha I wish I knew
<Linkadmin> but it would be cool... a random porn scene
generator
<pantherqs> that'd be sweet... have the program randomly
insert a chick's body with randomly generating tit size, hair
color, shaved or not shaved.. then have a whole slew of
randomly chosen actions... suck, fuck, bukakke.... oh man. i
wish i could code.

<sad|st> grrrrrrrr
<sad|st> im going to *kill* my ex
<TblunT> good
<TblunT> ex's suck
<TblunT> fuck em
<sad|st> i spend 20 mins making fresh whipped cream every year
and she demands i put Cool MotherFucking Whip on her shit
<sad|st> %&)%&*%&
<TblunT> sounds like the cream isn't the only thing whipped y0

<radiohead> hey emp
<radiohead> http://www.stileproject.com/hotty.html
<Emperor3D> i'd fuck her
<photons> hahah
<Emperor3D> and cum on her tummy and face.
<photons> did you go all the way down..
<photons> brrwwahahaha
<radiohead> would you cum on her dick too?
<Emperor3D> :(

<+sp0re> most CS players are illiterate
<+sp0re> infact nearly everyone on the internet is
<@nem0r> sp0re
<@nem0r> its alliterate
<+sp0re> no
<+sp0re> illiterate
<@nem0r> nah
<@nem0r> alliterate
<+sp0re> shut up
<+[IRF]Peng> illiterate nem0r :P
<+DCCwis> <nem0r> alliterate
<+DCCwis> lol
<+sp0re> he's a n00b
<@nem0r> smb
<+DCCwis> so if you were sick you'd say i'm "all"
<@nem0r> forget it
<@nem0r> fucking n00b clan anyway
* Parts: nem0r
(dopedealer@host217-41-6-148.in-addr.btopenworld.com)
<+sp0re> you can tell the CS players from a mile

<Rogue> lol @ my dads message just sent to me
<Rogue> "Press down if you think your gay"
<Rogue> i pressed down
<Rogue> "You fucking faggot"
<Rogue> he is an asshole
* Rogue slaps his dad

shocka: God should have put women's eyeballs in their boobs

*** Now talking in #athlon
*** Topic is '<pitz_> just good ol fashioned diesel talk
<---I  thought this was Taxi Cab Confessions?'
*** Set by Richter!
~richter@pontiacil-240.illinois.prairieinet.net on Tue Nov 26
23:37:20
<Weng> Diesel talk: What goes on in truck stop diners when
teenage prostitutes are absent
<Weng> Suddenly, pitz appears out of nowhere and refutes the
idea that semis use true diesel because there is no
"Freightliner FL70 TDI"

<pr0tman> my gpa was in airforce. flew u2 n shit in cold war
<sn1per> i don't like u2...none of their music is any good

<Nick> i go over my friends' houses with the sole intention of
eating their food.

<PooJou> very very wrong
<milenko> btw, how did goatse start?
<Rainwulf> i think the only pic that ever really made me feel
funny was that pic of the guy whose cock was split down the
middle
<Rainwulf> that was..... not good
<Rainwulf> i mean wow, that must of hurt. fuck.

<Howard> My wife keeps getting sales calls on her cell.
<Howard> I picked it up this afternoon and told the
salesperson "I need two things from you."
<Howard> "First, I need you to put me on the no-call list."
<Howard> "Second, I need your credit card number so I can
charge you for calling me on this cell phone."
<Howard> They fell all over themselves apologizing and hung
up.

<Ronwe> I think I've done one of the evillest things
imaginable
<Ronwe> in my twins search I came across faked olsen twin porn
<D`mer> what?
<D`mer> ick
<Ronwe> I downloaded them
<Ronwe> so I went into channels on IRC the other night and
said..
<Ronwe> If anybody is interested in some decent faked celeb
pron to /msg me
<Ronwe> those who messaged me got olsen twin porn
<Ronwe> I'm banned from about 20 rooms in dalnet now
* Ronwe grins evilly
<D`mer> lol

<@elf> my liver is more masculine than yours
<@Vexer`> my liver is a female.. ofcourse yours is..
<@Vexer`> but i bet mine is hot..
<@elf> of all the dumb things you've ever said, i think that's
the dumbest.
<@Vexer`> i don't say many dumb things..
<@Vexer`> do i?

<HUGE_SUCKER> IT'S PART OF TEH CONSPIRACY HATTER DON'T ASK
WE'LL HAVE TO KILL YOU
<TimboFinanceBlows> <---!!!!!
<HUGE_SUCKER> Is that supposed to be a dick, Timbo?  Because I
read that (including your nick) as "Timbo Finance Blows Cock"
<TimboFinanceBlows> it would not be far off from teh truth
<Nicodemus> man... if that is supposed to be a dick, timbo
needs to see the doctor
<TimboFinanceBlows> finance sucks my left nut
<HUGE_SUCKER> Of course, the fact that I see '<---!!!!!' and
read 'cock' means I've been reading bash too much

<Compute> man I'm going insane here..I hope katie decides not
to go clubbing tomorrow night :|
<Mercster> com: so lay down the law and tell her not to go.
<Compute> merc:  I don't think she'd pay any attention ;)
* Mercster hands compute the pants.

<Upth> did you know that the plastic used to make the keyboard
keys warps when it gets wet and dries off?
<ChryoZach> Nope.
<Upth> my keys are beginning to wrinkle from sheer skin
moisture.
<ChryoZach> And now I've learned something today.
<Upth> a bunch of the keys you can't even read anymore.
<ChryoZach> I don't know whether to laugh or feel really bad. 
Wow.  This place really has made me numb.

<sampson> twisted my fuckin ankle...don't go to riots in
birkenstocks
<sampson> they aren't good rioting shoes

<Kamatz> Tails is cute. But I part of what I like about him is
his innocense.

<Mhoram> I'll just say, anus is an aquired taste

<Ronwe> when I signed onto IRC I didn't expect to be involved
in sodomy
<Ronwe> or incest....
<Ronwe> or be enjoying it....

<Tetsuo> Isn't using NOSPAM in a Hotmail address kind of like
trying to stop a hurricane with plywood?

<red_one> fear the wrath of the sexually frustrated op.

<FatZZ> sif vinc, you were just so uncool that even the magic
players rejected you ;)

<CoRDS> there is a fine line between fishing and standing on
the shore like an idiot.

<Lestat> I should invent a way to make porn into music.
<Matrix_McCloud> yes
<Lestat> So you could be rocking out and looking at porn at
the same time.
<Matrix_McCloud> oh
<Lestat> By like, rocking out to porn.

<CommanderStab> ARGH
<CommanderStab> It just dawned on me that the "pen" I was
chewing was actually a pair of scissors @_@
<CommanderStab> It dawned on me when I cut my lip on them >_<

<Nerd> IE closed while I was logging in and now when I try to
open it, it triggers a fatal exception.
<MikeyPain> hmmm
<Nerd> I really don't want to be forced into using the AOL
browser, damn it.
<MikeyPain> Does it say "Click Yes if you have a small penis?"
and then won't let you click no?
<Nerd> Exactly.

<dustin> seti@home isn't actually doing anything worth while,
they're just trying to see how many morons they can get to
waste cpu cycles
<Teck7> no there doing a great thing
<dustin> when they finally do find intelligent life they're
gonna come down and kick your ass for wasting cpu cycles

<Gir> brb I gota get out of the shitter now.
<Mardom> what
<Mardom> the fuck

<Grimmel> STICKING YOUR PENIS INTO ANOTHER DUDES ASS IS
DISGUSTING
<Grimmel> UNLESS ITS MARDOM
<Mardom> what?

<NikJam> gonna take a shower
<NikJam> cause i smell, i feel dirty, and worse of all
<NikJam> I have school tommorow
<NikJam> and I can't look bad in front of the girl at the
counter
<Lime> you like her, dont you
<NikJam> well
<NikJam> there's noone else to like, i go to community college
<NikJam> i take what i can get

<Tetsubo> ever wish you could just start life over cause you
didn't know what to do the first time around and messed it all
up?
<Tetsubo> why doesn't real life have a tutorial mode?