<Celestar> note to self: Next person who wants to talk me into
buying his firewall by telling me that my computer broadcasts
an IP address will be ball-hung

<Halibut> Oh dear
<Halibut> I just tried to swat a fly with my cursor

<ShamansMystery> odd, i'm ignoreing msn and mygf is online and
not bitching at me for ignoring her
<CyberDoc> Mayb shes cybering with someone else Shaman hehe.
* bacon03 slowly closes msn

<toaster> Whats' the worst thing about having a heart/lung
transplant ?
<toaster> Coughing up somebody else's phlegm

<@bort13> I don't have my virginity, but I still have the box
it came in

<feral> woo hoo..... i knew watchin MacGyver all these nights
would pay off <feral> i just rewired the end of my cat5 cable
with a pocket knife and a safety pin

* Azwok (~Mini_Mc88@=Hsmqzsw-30.honey-damsel.dialup.pol.co.uk)
Quit (Ping Timeout)
<Elleomea> heh, freeserve have freaky machine names :/
<Elleomea> "honey-damsel"
<Elleomea> I can't help feeling that should be a euphamism for
prostitute or something

<Tomasu> !calc 2**64
<Mossie> calc, result '1.84467440737096e+19'
<Tomasu> !calc 2**128
<Mossie> calc, result '3.40282366920938e+38'
<entheh> !calc meow
<Mossie> calc, error 'Bareword "meow" not allowed while
"strict subs" in use at (eval 15) line 1, <GEN0> line 66.

(+[Aries]^PCW) OH HAS ARIES STILL GOT IT
(+[Aries]^PCW) I THINK SO!
(+Sheepy) im sure itll go away if you take those pills the
doctor prescribed

* EddieCoon mashes his hands against the keyboard idly.
<EddieCoon> Wow! What're the chances that that would come out
from mashing my hands against the keyboard!

<sent> 84 counts of rape ;/
<cougSanF> yeah
<cougSanF> all while the girls were drugged
<cougSanF> and he filmed it
<cranky-> 84 counts of rape?
<shaan> hm
<shaan> are the vids on kazaa?

<Airlea> it used to horrify me every time we went past a field
of sheep.. he'd make all these noises. That's why he's an ex.

<omega> it was funny
<omega> we had this argument ('ve been getting into a lot of
these latley, about the us)
<omega> and as soon as i brought in the facts
<omega> like
<omega> that the patriot missile system is the same as it was
in desert storm, minus a few tweaks like radar upgrades
<omega> and how the US put saddam in power in the first place
<omega> gave him weapons
<omega> and shit
<omega> and how the US put whats his face in power in panama,
and then had to later go in and get him
<omega> and the whole arming and training bin laden
<omega> he decided the only way he could counter it
<omega> was by saying that since the USD is worth 30 cents
more than canada's therefore canada sucks, and the US is smart
<omega> and then he stopped talking

<BobTheMilkman> eating eggs is liking giving a bird an
abortion followed by eating the aborted fetus

<JOCK> i want to go to Six Fags
<JOCK> Flags>>>>>>.....sorry
<KID_B> You wanna go do Six Fags?
* KID_B steps back
<KID_B> word up man.. do your thing..
<JOCK> nawww man
<JOCK> you know rides,lonnytoons,and stuff
<KID_B> Yeah. Gay bars.

<Wasted-> http://bash.org/?1730
<Wasted-> http://bash.org/?3630
<BadDoggie> http://bash.org/?22799
<BadDoggie> Wasted: quit typing the top 100
<Mitzii> why, your monitor running out of ink or something???

[anewname] CAPS LOCK IS LIKE CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL

<CaSe-> mines this big
[-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------]
<Commando^> Your dick has wordwrap?

<gbWrk> * U.N. nuke agency urges Iran to be 'fully
transparent'
<gbWrk> turn Iran into glass!

<D> the #amish dont believe in pr0n
<D> :P
<D> well, they do
<D> but it's all ankle-flashing to them

* phoen][x hears 'Sounds of /dev/urandom' (dd if=/dev/urandom
of=/dev/dsp)

<Eckostyle> If Mexico had a major eathquake, Britain would
send 100,000 replacement troopes to control the riots, Brasil
would send 100,00 pounds of replacement food, and teh USA
would send 100,000 repalcement Mexicans

<Boycy> ooh, find me an ip :)
<Boycy> have a 3line batch file to send the same net send msg
until you push Ctrl+C :D
<Hub-Security> boycy has ip: 137.222.226.67
<Kameleon> 137.222.226.67
<Boycy> excuse me for a few seconds...
<Boycy> FUCKER
<Kameleon> lmao
<Boycy> I know how to find *my* ip you bastard
<Boycy> 600 shitty net send boxes oh god I hate you

<phreakinb> 1876: At the Centennial Exposition in
Philadelphia, America's first 100-year birthday bash, fair
goers visit the Turkish Hashish Exposition and toke up in
order to enhance their fair experience.
<`WarpKat> it's nice to know that my parents weren't the only
stoners from the past

<Satan> lmao "You know how bad evolution is going right now? 
Me."

<Eckostyle> any girls want sex? send me a message privately
<Eckostyle> fuck, my mom saw me type that

<tuffy> Its hard to prove one isn't a professional litigious
bastard while suing someone else for being called that

<@cs`on`xbox> it's fucking hott
<@cs`on`xbox> no more spikes
<@cs`on`xbox> no more lag
<@cs`on`xbox> no more fps problems
<@cs`on`xbox> just CS
<+oi> i'll steal your tv

<Svenson> lol.. yahoo says "Someone else has already chosen
svensonwhocannotfigureoutaloginname"

<gash> It's hard to find a potenial employer that will accept
resume's via dcc :)

<Batty> Darth Vader is Lukes father!
<Batty> and father in dutch = vader
<Borlath_Mon> ...yeeeeeees
<Batty> So he's darth father!
<Borlath_Mon> So? George Lucas wasn't counting on Star Wars
fans to be clever enough to speak any language other than
"Trailer Trash".

<sui`> the good news is, you're almost through the sickness
<sui`> the bad news is, it's sars and you're going to die.

<@SJr> * g o a t s e x * g o a t s e x * g o a t s e x *
<@SJr> g                                               g 
<@SJr> o /                              /           o 
<@SJr> a|       |                       |      |      a 
<@SJr> t|       `.             |         |       :     t 
<@SJr> s`        |             |        |       |     s 
<@SJr> e        | /       /  \   --__ \       :    e 
<@SJr> x        /   _--~~          ~--__|      |    x 
<@SJr> *         _-~                    ~-_    |    * 
<@SJr> g    _             _.--------.______|   |    g 
<@SJr> o           ______// _ ___ _ (_(__>     |    o 
<@SJr> a          .  C ___)  ______ (_(____>  |  /    a 
<@SJr> t       / |   C ____)/       (_____>  |_/     t 
<@SJr> s      / /|   C_____)       |  (___>   /      s 
<@SJr> e     |   (   _C_____)______/  // _/ /        e 
<@SJr> x     |      |__   \_________// (__/       |  x 
<@SJr> *    |     ____)   `----   --'             |  * 
<@SJr> g    |  _          ___       /_          _/ | g 
<@SJr> o   |              /    |     |              | o 
<@SJr> a   |             |    /                    | a 
<@SJr> t   |          / /    |         |             |t 
<@SJr> s   |         / /      __/___/    |          |s 
<@SJr> e  |         / /        |    |       |         |e 
<@SJr> x  |          |         |    |       |         |x 
<@SJr> * g o a t s e x * g o a t s e x * g o a t e x *

<sKILLET> wut up m?
<m> uhm
<m> J, K and L

XtBA: oh yea and my moms wants u to ask ur pops if he can
drive us to air plane thing
XtBA: holy shit i forgot the name
XtBA: oh yea... airport
Jiggy: ....wow
XtBA: haha i was thinking bout plane station

MYNAME15NEO: Damnit...
DgtlHavoc: ?
MYNAME15NEO: The only place I can put my cheezits will block
the light on my keyboard
DgtlHavoc: did you try the top of your head?
DgtlHavoc: on top the monitor?
DgtlHavoc: on the floor?
MYNAME15NEO: Thats where I've got the lamp
MYNAME15NEO: The monitors already got enough shit on it
MYNAME15NEO: And I don't have a floor
DgtlHavoc: ?
DgtlHavoc: living in a electomagnetically suspended desk?
MYNAME15NEO: Chair and desk is suspended from cables by a
blackhawk helicopter
MYNAME15NEO: I won the helicopter using my Pepsi points

<SillyBoob> HELP
<SillyBoob> WILL SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME
<SillyBoob> WHERE DO YOU GO TO DOWNLOAD THE CDS?
<SillyBoob> MY CUZIN DOWNLOADED HTIS FOR ME
<Takaznik> type /quit get cd list and wait for about an hour
* Quits: SillyBoob (get cd list)
<Naked_Eye> How much you bet he will be back in an hour

DoUBle  ChiN 47: omg im gonna be the most popular kid in
school tomorrow
rcknouttonight: why
DoUBle  ChiN 47: i have tic tacs

<ANTIDEAD> I had a dream last night that I met you in real
life, so we dressed up as zoro and smuggled drugs over the
mexican border
<ANTIDEAD> Perhaps I should lay off the burritos

<GrimReap99> Anti is an example of an over-irc-ed child.
<GrimReap99> Antidead: "Hallo mother, what is for teh
breakfahst? double eww tee eff? Pancakes? Stfu."
<ANTIAWAY> dad - "!kb Antidead"
<GrimReap99> Mother: "!topic Pancakes biotch"

<Siidu> what died, the hdd?
<BelaHatesCleaningShazz> FUCKING CHRIST!
<BelaHatesCleaningShazz> yeah
<BelaHatesCleaningShazz> some complicated core shit
<BelaHatesCleaningShazz> brought it down faster than a fat
chick falling down a stairwell

<ChemicalBurn> ah i have an erection and i dont know why
<ChemicalBurn> scarey!
* ChemicalBurn is now known as Chem`shower

* darkLem notes there are alot of bash.org quotes that are
just Bill Hicks quotes
<darkLem> cheating bastards.

<xen0cide> Whats black and blue and hates sex?
<Cloud9> Jesus, what?
<xen0cide> Its not Jesus, its the 7 year old in my trunk.
<Cloud9> You sick fuck.

<@Phucker> Calling people by their real-names on IRC is a
violation of RFC1459.

<`sic> now that should be in guinness
<`sic> world record for longest rolling ball of cats

<NeilX> They have rename the Bible
<NeilX> its now called
<NeilX> The Sidez
<NeilX> I read chapter one.
<NeilX> the hold gospel according to Sega
<NeilX> and the mighty sidez came down
<NeilX> and he said
<NeilX> let their be VIRTUA FIGHTER
<NeilX> AND POOF
<NeilX> 10 billon JAP PROGRAMMERS made virtua fighter
<NeilX> the lord sidez said
<NeilX> teh sucks there is no good combo moves
<NeilX> let their be VIRTUA FIGHTER 2
<NeilX> 10 billon JAP PROGRAMMERS made virtua figher
<wazy> neil is drunk
<NeilX> but the elite g0d sidez said, i need more vectorz
<NeilX> AND POOF
<NeilX> THE DICSIPLE XBOX WAS BORNAGE
<Sidez> ON THE SEVENTH DAY
<Sidez> I CREATED
<Sidez> TEH XBOX
<Sidez> AND IT WAS BIG
<NeilX> and it sucked
<Sidez> SILENCE INFIDEL
<NeilX> ON THE EIGTH DAY HE CREATED HIS OWN COCK
<NeilX> AND IT WAS SMALL
* NeilX laughs

<sixxer> bmbr.. ROOOOOOCKS
<bmbr> yeo
<bmbr> whysat
<sixxer> bmbr: cos of your new bot
<bmbr> hopefully he stays stable and quiet
<bmbr> and takes very little work on my part
<sixxer> I'd like to see him freak out and start throwing
people in blenders
<bmbr> ill see if theres a .tcl for that

* freeloki hopes that this emote works; otherwise, he'll look
like an idiot.
<Abstruse> "emote"?
* freeloki notes that his emoting was successful. 8)
<Abstruse> I remember when the /me command was called an
ACTION...now it's an "emote"?  Dude, they've finally managed
to pussify IRC...

<Jamon> he said, "my girlfriend fucks like a rabid hamster."
<Jamon> other guy said, "wow, that's great.....mine fucks like
a walrus."