<link>once upon a midnight dreary, while i pron surfed, weak
and weary, over many a strange and spurious site of ' hot  xxx
galore'. While i clicked my fav'rite bookmark, suddenly there
came a warning, and my heart was filled with mourning,
mourning for my dear amour, " 'Tis not possible!", i muttered,
" give me back my free hardcore!"..... quoth the server, 404.
<hokage> *cries*, scary....

* SykoFreud (~anders@oc12-1-oslo.nsn.no) has joined #rap
<SykoFreud> so uhm ... I am a producer from norway, and i am
looking for good rappers.
<Kris81> word
<Kris81> shizzle mah nizzle let me drop this line for you foo
<pauze> hahaha
<Kris81> i make dem raps so good your pants be filled with goo
<pauze> bla bla bla bla
<pauze> ha ha ha ha
<pauze> im the best rapper out there
<pauze> LOL
<SykoFreud> I see.
* SykoFreud (~anders@oc12-1-oslo.nsn.no) has left #rap

<baka-san> a byte to eat? *groan*
<baka-san> I ate at a suhsi place once that called their
pieces bits,
you could order a 4-bit nibble, and 8-bit byte, a 16-bit
halfword, or a
32-bit word.
<baka-san> Some of their large combo platters were named after
structs.
<baka-san> The TCP header that we ordered was very tasty.
<billf> "you know you're in silicon valley when...."

<Icedagger> this is still the best name i've ever found in
canada411... Harry Poon

<Bayls> Kaff - can you stop changing your nick. My notify list
is about 98MB now, since I simply must know the nanosecond you
come online.
<Kaffy> bayls, thats FUNNY considering you never talk to me :(
<Kaffy> and dammit, i miss you so much when you're not here.
or soemthing.
<Bayls> Kaffy - Sadly, that's true. However, I find enough
solace staring doefully out the window into the night,
illuminated only by the soft haze of my monitor, thinking of
you and humming "Soooommeewhere ouuuut theeere..."
<Bayls> Then I load up the vast gallery of porn, all carefully
edited to include your head with the tampons stuck up your
nose on each body, have a brisk pull, then fall into a restful
sleep, my own manpaste hardening to a flaky crust as I
slumber.
<Kaffy> aww how romantic *sniff*

<MrWhippy> The term 'Bisexual' is the politicly correct way to
say you fuck anything

<Naudiz> my IQ is high enough that I can do anything I want
<Naudiz> college means nothing
<netbsd_> What is this almighty IQ you have and what
self-scoring IQ test gave you the idea you have it?
<Naudiz> I'm a Mensa member .. I allready mentioned this.
<netbsd_> So you're in the top two percent of the population?
<netbsd_> This is me being impressed.
<Naudiz> no actually ... only 1 in 50 people qualify to be in
Mensa

<ruffkin2> HAHAHAH dat dude you sent me 127.0.0.1 iz enfected
wit sub7 im fuckin with him now
<andrw>  oh good, format his computer
<Testicular_One> format his computer
<TheGreaterZero> format him

<Fluidmist> so, who wants to come to mexico with me?
<technophobe> i would, but i dont speak mexican
<Fluidmist> i thought you spoke spanish.
<techophobe> i do, i dont speak mexican though
<Fluidmist> are you serious?
<technophobe> what? yes
<Fluidmist> who wants to be the one to explain this to him?

<@rs> i just told someone to not hide the ichat-av vu meter
under another window as it would muffle his voice

<Caspian777> Once I get my picture on the net, you'll see. :P
<Suvorov> ooh can i have your picture?
<Suvorov> no baby ones though - i can't masturbate to those

<fintler> I'm 14176 lines of java closer to getting about
$2000
<DocGonzo> maybe you can overcome the stigma that most java
apps are gay
<fintler> once you ignore the stigma....it's kinda addictive
<DocGonzo> you mean like bumlove?

<Amish> why are people fascinated with cartoon porn
<Amish> I mean, do you watch the Simpsons and really feel the
need to (poorly) photoshop lisa giving bart head?
<Gudrow> when hitler was an artist he specialized in tentacle
rape portaiture
<Mr_X> Gudrow: That's how the alliance between Germany and
Japan began
<jre> That, and the German-Japanese scat fetish
<Mr_X> The scat fetish is the result of secret WW2 nazi
experiments
<Mr_X> "HANZ, I SHALL NOW DEFECATE IN YOUR MOUTH, JA?" "JA"
"DO YOU FEEL LIKE AN UBERSOLDAT YET?"

<Kilroy> gods, I'm dating myself again
<MPG> at least you only have to get one person drunk to have
sex.

<Murphy01> If i cloned myself, changed the y chromosome to an
x chromosome, and then had sex with her, would it be
masturbation, or incest?
<DS> how about fucking nasty?
<Murphy01> Well, that too.

<Bungie> You know porn has become an addiction when you are
standing at the gas pump filling your bike and just before you
top it off, you pull the hose out and spray it all over the
tank.

<prae> my sister is so goddamn retarded
<prae> she called mom cause she gave blood today and mom told
her to drink alot of fluids
<prae> so she drank beer
<prae> what a fucking moron

·Jocelyn32· I would like to chat with single a English girl,
SMART and slim (even if its scarce). Those who are STUPIDS,
have several children from different fathers and/or don't
work, please don't come to see me I AM NOT INTEREST IN YOU. Me
I have a good look, gentle and funny
·Jocelyn32· In brief...
·Jocelyn32· I m searching for an English girl who sucks,
swallows, says thank you and then takes a taxi

<[-FcG-]Poet> lucifer is so 20th century, the devil should
rename himself something like 1337Kill@r

<FluKex> isnt cheddar house for the alternative sexual
preference people?
<crib> FluKex you mean fags?
<FluKex> crib my term is less..  umm,  bah,  ya,   its for
fags

(monkeh^): this girl from the us was emailing me saying her
tummy hurts, out of curiosity i ask why its hurting
(monkeh^): i got the reply today
(monkeh^): and ill say this; she should have lied

<aO-> ugh
<aO-> almost had a brown out
<aO-> and im gone
* Quits: aO- (~aO@ip68-14-10-213.ri.ri.cox.net) (Client Quit)
<ecoli> sounds like someone had Taco Bell for lunch

Fairytalehero: ok, so someitmes me and kel shower together
Fairytalehero: and i'll have to pee. so i go "hey kel, look at
this" or something, and start PEEING ON HER
Fairytalehero: she gets so mad and tries to block it
Fairytalehero: but i'm like HAHA I'M PEEING ON YOUR HAND

<Reaper> ur not 1337 hehe
<wonderboy> i am 19

<remix> i was gonna come back and say "fuck the children" but
i realized that it wouldnt sound too good
<ecoli> yeah
<melly> ic
<mkart64> yeah then you go to jail
<ecoli> besides, some of us are way ahead of you :D

<shroom> wtf your nick is obnoxious
<`_^-_`_^\^|```_-__^_\`_```> so is yours

<axiom-> mike myers is fuckin canadian
<axiom-> he'd outsmart those two nitwit killers anyday
<starrie> the guy from halloween
<starrie> not austin powers
<starrie> ninny.
<axiom-> oh.

<BoneCollector> well americanisation is quite big in SA
<BoneCollector> all the youngsters hear want to be like the
Americans, especially with the black kids
<mog> that's funny
<mog> all the white kids here want to be africans
<mog> who would have thought

<exo> a/s/l?
<exo> i have blonde hair and blue eyes
<exo> i like to run and play with my dog
<torechednodle> i like long walks on the beach and men who
arent afraid to cry
<exo> can i approach you torechednodle
<torechednodle> omg cybersex?
<torechednodle> yes, but please turn on your landing lights
and adjust ILS for approach to vector 160
<exo> there is a dead animal on the runway
<torechednodle> yes dont mind that i was shaving

<ClothHat> Isn't Canadian currency made out of tree bark or
something?
<Cidolfas> CH: Isn't American currency made out of the skins
of natives?
<ClothHat> That and broken treaties.

<@ecoli> i should just ln -s /dev/urandom ircd.conf
<@ecoli> and keep restarting it
<@ecoli> eventually it'll get everything right
<@Wink> lol
<@ecoli> stupid ssl.
<@ecoli> this couldn't be less documented if it were an md5
encrypted haiku.

<Afghani> hi
<Afghani> h r u?
<zebra> what the hell kind of language is that?
<zebra> are you fucking fingerly impaired or something?

<exo> why are redneck murders so hard to solve
<exo> cuz theres no dental records and all their DNA is the
same
<fearz> HAHAHA

(@Ti-chan) Bukkake is when a Mommy and a Daddy and a Daddy and
a Daddy and a Daddy and a Daddy and a Daddy all decide that
Mommy needs some special facial moisturiser

<Midnight_Puppy> It does not matter if you are heavily
outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts - your enemies
will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around
in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their
predecessors

<Mewten> video games are now making us nerds do things we
would never do in other situations: Dance (DDR), Play an
instrument (Samba de Amigo), and now, GO OUTSIDE. Pretty soon
we'll be like normal people

<dirtYbird> I am looking for a ecommerce package or someone to
make one up, mulitlingual etc. Found one in Jamaica but I find
it hard to take anything from there too serious, I can picture
them sitting back in front of their PC's with joints the size
of rolled newspapers on the phone telling me "it'll be coool
mon"

<alobodig-2> Spraying a can of Dust-Off directly into my navel
was just about the worst idea I've ever had.

<predetah> i seen a real hackers movie once, but i couldnt
stand ot watch it all.. those geeks were so ugly
<predetah> this zerocool charactor aint to easy to look at it
either

<kohupiimakook> how can u connect two computers
<kohupiimakook> like lan, but without ethernet card
<suksu> with glue maybe

<Joey> holy nutsac in a tree
<LookOutForTheWam> How do you think it got up there?
<Joey> it's holy
<LookOutForTheWam> Someone castrated god?

<Md0za> HI MEN
<MadHattr> Men is plural, I'm singular
<Md0za> >:
<Md0za> u have botnet?
<MadHattr> no.
<Md0za> <:
<Md0za> i have botnet
<Md0za> u want flood?
<MadHattr> I know your IP and I work for your ISP. Want
internet disconnect?
<Md0za> no
<Md0za> <:
<Md0za> u heck?
<MadHattr> no
<Md0za> <
<Md0za> <:
<Md0za> i am hack
<Md0za> heck
<Md0za> i am 14 yers old
<MadHattr> I've noticed

<@herugachan> Abstract art is semi-intellectual masterbation.

<ChanServ> [|Wolf|] <|Wolf|> maybe you didn't notice my
SARCASM
<m|p|Leo`xp> yo
<m|p|Leo`xp> anybody in here?
* |Wolf| is now known as No
<m|p|Leo`xp> ;-/
<m|p|Leo`xp> wolf
<m|p|Leo`xp> do u know if any1 is taking site requests?
<No> this nickname should answer all your questions
<m|p|Leo`xp> o roger that
<m|p|Leo`xp> do u know when faction will be back?
<No> ...
* No points to his nickname
<m|p|Leo`xp> k

<sherlock_holmes|eating> heh, so i an anatomoy paper due
yesterday, and when i was babysitting last week i asked if
they wouldn't mind if i usede their comp
<sherlock_holmes|eating> the dad said yea, so i asked if he
had a filter for adult material turned on.  he got a
suspicious look in his eye and i told him that filters also
block out non-pr0n related material, and since i'm doing an
anatomy paper, it'd block out words that anatomy sites use,
like penis or vagina
<sherlock_holmes|eating> he said he'd turn it off on the
condition that i would promise not to use it for pr0n and i
said 'nah, i took care of that before i came over' and we both
kind of chuckled
<sherlock_holmes|eating> needless to say his wife was saying
good-bye to the kid in the next room and they could hear me
and not 10 minutes later i'm at home just wondering why my
timid masturbation joke did more damage to that kids inner
psyche than his mom calling me a filthy bastard who should rot
in hell right in front of the little guy in that high annoying
voice that women get...
<ssj_gotensama> lol, you were gonna use it for wankin weren't
ya
<sherlock_holmes|eating> no that's the thing, i wasn't... i
brought over anal invaders 2 for when the kid went to sleep,
you can track web surfing history, you can't track what videos
you put in the vcr
<ssj_gotensama> well i guess the worst part is your out of an
8 buck an hour job
<sherlock_holmes|eating> no the worst part is i left my
anatomy book over at their place and i don't have the balls to
go over and ask for it =(

(Axis): oh shit, i set a timer and now i can't turn it off
(Axis): how the hell do you turn it off
(@Zaphod): type /timers
(@Zaphod): you will be told the timer number
(@Zaphod): like * Timer 2 /do something
(@Zaphod): then type /timer2 off
(@Zaphod): notice, no space after timer
(Axis): okay but it's still beepinng
(Axis): it says there is no active timers
(@Zaphod): Ahh, you didnt type / beep <number> did you ?
(Axis): but IT'S STILL BEEPING! AAAAGH!
(Axis): yeah, i did
(Axis): is that bad
(@Zaphod): what was the number you typed?
(Axis): 39482034 i think, something like that
(@Zaphod): lol - it aint stopping till it beeps that many
times
(Axis): well shit

<Valqorez> I heard a strange commercial on the radio at work
today....
<Valqorez> "Treat yourself to a facial and raise money for
charity at the same time."
<Valqorez> I was like "What is this, a sponsored bukkake?"
<Foz> hahaha
<Valqorez> My manager gave me a long, funny look.
<Foz> lol. I didn't think many people knew that word
<Valqorez> Maybe she speaks Japanese....
<Valqorez> Odd thing was, all I could do was shrug and and say
"What?"
<Foz> I know that look

<MB|Linux> so Python is a good language to start out with?
<Mike|Linux> heh sure
<Mike|Linux> That's what I am doing right now.. Or breaking
another part of linux. ;)
<MB|Linux> I rememeber the old Tandy/Commodore basic :)
<MB|Linux> lol
<MB|Linux> Cool
<MB|Linux> 10 do this
<MB|Linux> 20 do that
<MB|Linux> 30 do this again
<MB|Linux> 40 run
<MB|Linux> 50 go fuck yourself
<MB|Linux> lol
<MB|Linux> 60 go get some food, this will take awhile.
<MB|Linux> Hmmm

<realmockturtle> i need to get
<realmockturtle> my nipples eyebrow and tonuge pierced
<realmockturtle> because apparently
<realmockturtle> that goes over well
<realmockturtle> oh yeah
<realmockturtle> not being a fatass would help too
<realmockturtle> but i can't solve that with a needle and a
hoop

<pLADASK> since people do not care about my alcohol-problems,
im sure johnny cash is off topic as well