<Clinton> "Here in canada, we have a special program to deal
with the homeless, its called "winter""

<@debaser> so
<@debaser> i'm kinda looking forward to seeing the passion
<blister> the question is though: which bitch is going to get
naked in this story (the hotty from Braveheart == win!)
<Azra`el> jesus died a virgin man
<Azra`el> remember?
<Pi> Azra`el: but Jesus got tempted like a mofo
<Pi> so some chick's probably all "let's sex0r" and he's all
"get thee behind me"
<blister> if they did that
<blister> i'd go see it

<chanman3> i was looking up slaves for a school project on
yahoo
<chanman3> on of the ads was: Buy and Sell "slaves" on E-bay.

<JerZgirl> damn i wish my husband would quit cruising around
looking for access points and come home already!
<Demon> Back when I was a kid, we just called them `girls'.
<digia> lmao

<Dan> I was at a funeral
<Saria> catholics suck..
<Dan> And I was drinking a pop
<Dan> And for some stupid reason... the holy water was plugged
into an electrical socket
<Dan> So the wire was just kinda hanging out
<Saria> so do pentecostals
<Dan> So I trip on it... land in the holy water, spilling this
brown pop in the holy water
<Saria> lol
<Saria> :/
<lophyte> LOL
<lophyte> awesome
<Dan> I look down and said "Whoa.. it's holy crap!"
<lophyte> LMAO
<lophyte> HAHAHA
<Saria> LOL
<Dan> Never saw the inside of that church again...

<EinHander MK II> wtf... how did my cat get INSIDE my computer
case...

AntF22: dude
AntF22: "goober" in pig latin is "oober gay"
AntF22: hahahahaha

<spyder> fuck it
<spyder> ima go kill myself
<spyder> bbl

<Chrisodeo> veni, veni, veni.
<CrazySteve> Pervert.

<kjones> last night i had sex with a model.
<simtaxijunki> O.o
<kjones> but then the glue melted
<kjones> and one of the wings fell off.
<kjones> go figure.

<mrsnazz> I'm a phreaker, you know what I mean, and I flip the
little switch on the red box
<mrsnazz> on the redbox, on the redbox yea
<mrsnazz> I'm to elite for my shirt, to elite for my shirt, so
elite it hurts
<nickr> on the pay phone, on the payphone
<mrsnazz> yea
<mrsnazz> i play my little tone to the payphone

<Rendrag> just remember your car actually has to stop at stop
signs
<Rendrag> my driving teacher only told me my wheels must stop
rotating
<Rendrag> i took her at her word
<Rendrag> and slid it round the corner onto the main street at
60 with all four wheels locked up
<LDM> hahahahahaha, Nice one.
<Rendrag> needless to say i had to sit my test a second time :

<jamesd> "... being a Linux user is sort of like living in a
house inhabited by a large family of carpenters and
architects. Every morning when you wake up, the house is a
little different. Maybe there is a new turret, or some walls
have moved. Or perhaps someone has temporarily removed the
floor under your bed."
* kop_ (~2@sdn-ap-019watacoP0124.dialsprint.net) has joined #
solaris
<sheenmaster> jamesd: being an OpenServer or UNIXWare user is
like living in a house that hasn't been touched by a carpenter
or inspected by an architect in years.  Every morning when you
wake up, the neighbor's house is a little better.  You are
justing thankful that the floor hasn't fallen out from beneath
your bed, cause you know it'll be half a decade before its
fixed.
* RainbowW has quit (Read error: 54 (Connection reset by
peer))
<sheenmaster> jamesd: being a Windows user is like living is a
cheap vegas hotel.  Every morning, you wake up with a new
disease.  The floor beneath your bed is likely to fall through
at any time, but at least you can burn the hotel down and
rebuild it or move to another room.
<jamesd> "Memory is like gasoline. You use it up when you are
running. Of course you get it all back when you reboot..."
<jamesd>  -- Actual explanation obtained from the Micro$oft
help desk.
<sheenmaster> haha
<sheenmaster> Damn Microsoft for coming up with better jokes
than we do!

<@Dogpile> 88. Who recorded "Join Together" in 1972?
<Tback> like who knows these
<@Dogpile> Tback got the answer: the who. In: 2.43 secs.
Streak: 1. Current wins 23!

<LukeIsTerrified> R. Kelly says: "Osama bin Laden is the only
one who knows exactly what I'm going through."
<LukeIsTerrified> I love it.
<Brave-o> He believes he can fly.
<Brave-o> Into buildings.

<David> Finally. It works. My Palm is working.
<schnorks> Now you can hold stuff

<~DuDE~> My sister was driving home today
<~DuDE~> Somebody comited suicide by jumping of a bridge onto
the motorway
<~DuDE~> And landed on my sister's bonnet!
<Barnes> Jesus christ that's terrible!
<Barnes> She'll lose her no claims discount on her insurance!

<[-will-]> damnit
<[-will-]> I cant find my video card
<Excors> Overclock it, then look for the source of the smoke

<Tempest> Has anyone seen Passion of the Christ?
<Yuki> I heard the guy playing Jesus was struck by lighting
twice while working on the set. 
<Mister Mittens> I've heard that as well... And I think
someone else on the set was hit by lightning as well... not
sure 
<Quinton> GOOD MOVIE 
<Teal> They weren't hit by lightning. They were smote. There's
a difference.

<Bazz> Every day you give me food, and yet I dont eat. I
always stand on four legs. What am I?
<Costilled> Calista Flockhart

<joeman> Rosa Parks is my idol.
<joeman> I, too, refuse to get up out of my seat.

<Kyote> What the fuck would a British version of Fight Club
be? Two really pale guys calling each other wankers and
throwing teabags around?

<b1u3> good...admitting your stupidity is the first step to
disguising it as charming immaturity.

<@Sprache> what do you guys know about the company that makes
RealPlayer?
<@KtuLi> I'd tell you, but the information is still buffering

<QuantumKat> Whitehouse Communications Director Dan Bartlett
has admitted that 'applause lines' were written into the
President's State of the Union Address of 2004. He went on to
say some of the applause was genuine.
<QuantumKat> everybody clap now
<mash|dead> ...
<mikedude> <applause sign lights up>

<Chibi-Trekkie> at school, some guy was like
<Chibi-Trekkie> are you going to prom?
<Chibi-Trekkie> and another guy was like PRON!? WHERE

<Gloomster> I'm not white
<Gloomster> I'm rhythmically challenged

<+Allahkat> Or say that you heard a rumour about some gays
having the female reproductive organs taken out of their dyke
friends, and insterted into their ass, so they CAN reproduce.
<+Allahkat> Or something as stupid as that.
<+Allahkat> See how many fall for it.
<@asshat> thats genius
<@asshat> imagine having a uterus in your ass
<@asshat> you could totally poop a kid out
<@bunnieWork> shit a kid.
<@bunnieWork> a shitday instead of a birthday.
<@asshat> then you have the right to call them little shits

<wasted> fuck
<wasted> lol
<wasted> apperantly transparancy can go 100%
<wasted> invisible
<wasted> i have a window somewhere. in my screen.
<wasted> god knows where ;
<sc0tt> LOL

<lude> Short summary of every Jewish holiday: They tried to
kill us, we won, let's eat.

<atarax> black people were invented by the government to get
rid of the crack

<TCbot> 
<TCbot> Q: Dictionary Definitions: Overly dramatic?
<TCbot>  
<altariel> female

Geezer_The_Douche: I want a customised Nintendo Powerglove
that shoots cancer at people.

<DarkOne> This nightvision effect simply looks as if someone
replaced your monitor with a bowl of lime sherbert.

[hehohno] I really swear rev is a music columnist.
[hehohno] You have that bitter, "radiohead is ok, if you like
rehashed pink floyd tracks" feel about you.

<Ged> uh, my big brother has got some girl in his room.. they
sound really nasty
<Ged> and her name doesn't end in .jpg
<G0rk> .avi then?
<Ged> indeed, if I can just find my video-cam

<Nubbers> Is there any listing of the criteria for a bash
quote, anyway? Or should I just make a joke combining
masturbation, child pornography, racism, and dungeons and
dragons...
<Edible> If it has "bash.org" or "nigger" in it, it'll get
in.  Watch.
<Edible> Hey, so nigger I nigger with nigger to nigger
bash.org nigger bash.org bash.org nigger nigger nigger.

<Foobar> i had to deliver something to a business downtown
that was next door to EMI Music Canada
<Foobar> i was very tempted to walk in the front lobby, scream
"I DOWNLOAD MP3S, BITCHES" and run out

<myr> grep me! oh grep me baby!
<myr> run your shells! keep my daemons happy!
<myr> you turn my kernel inside out!
<myr> time to put on the red hat!
<myr> is that a penguin i see sticking out of your pants hun?
<myr> linux geeks having sex

[@cwatford] i really do need to write my childrens books
[@cwatford] i plan on scaring children shitless about common
programming errors
[@Entrope] "jane thought overrunning buffers was great fun
until the exploit monster bit off her head!"

(Omorpheus) I think rappers are the noobs of the music world
"OMGZ YO I R GANGSTER"

<Kormiic> I think you should reverse one of the letters in
your band logo, then you can have an official thumb in the
nu-metal market.

<Gerard> Damn bitch fuck damn.
<Tom> PG-13 Gerard
<Gerard> Dang gosh golly dang

[+Makura] did you hear about the Chinese couple that had
[+Makura] > a retarded baby?
[+Makura] They named him Sum Ting Wong
SeeDee shakes his head
[+TomHung] so a guy walks into a bar with a monkey
[+TomHung] i forget the rest of the joke, but your mom's a
whore

<+______Ric> I wonder what would cause a sixteen year old girl
to think she could run me.
<+dami> a vagina

<warezfrea> can any1 tell me where I can download GTA Vice
city?
<@Conz> buy it, rip it, put up your own ftp, download it

* krazy (~krazy@cD9088C66.sdsl.catch.no) Quit (Quit: A good
discussion is like a miniskirt; Short enough to pertain
interest and long enough to cover the subject.)

<VeryMuchS> I have been looking for some fucking old school
Are You Afraid Of The Dark

<ravuya> LIBERAL SOCIALIST MOTHERFUCKER PENGUINS ARE GOING TO
EAT MY CAPITALISM

<@amoeba> hey, what's the keyboard shortcut to discard the
current buffer in emacs?
<@thatguy> do you have 12 fingers