<RevSlidey> a baby seal walks into a club

*** Jesus is now known as [_[_]
<[_[_]> lets see you
<[_[_]> break my ass of steel

<Karmer> got damn it i accidently just shit in my pants
<Karmer> brb

<RonaldJ> dood
<RonaldJ> we should start a site
<RonaldJ> like Am I Hot
<RonaldJ> and
<RonaldJ> Like My Nude Pic?
<RonaldJ> but call it
<RonaldJ> How Do I Look In This Shirt?
<RonaldJ> .com

<iMike-> ah god
<iMike-> i feel sick
<Fustard> did you get my cold?
<Fustard> i knew we shouldnt have slept together like that!

<Guilty> My friends cousin's mom told her kids that if you
cursed online the police came to arrest you
<Guilty> So they would type like "Go to h!ll!"

<|Chris> i want you to setup a word substitution in your head
<|Chris> whenever you see the term "wrestling," i want you to
think, "white trash"

<|Chris> fat chicks are like mopeds
<|Chris> fun to ride, but don't let your friends see you on
one
<DigDug> heh
<DigDug> she's like a scooter though
<var> understand 1 thing tho: fat chicks are so grateful to
get laid that they will do your laundry fuck you suck you cook
you dinner and 13reakfast and not har13or ill will when u want
to leave and go smoke dope w/ your friends.
<DigDug> ya
<DigDug> but they're fat
<|Chris> hahahah
<|Chris> yeah..there's the whole not being physically
attracted to them problem

<Guilty> You see
<Guilty> Fat ugly girls shouldnt be allowed to use ":)"
<Guilty> Their sign should be "=)000"

(SpAc3d-) T@$#@R!@##!I!#!#P!#!#
(SpAc3d-) if you were tripping it would show up really clearly
:P

<chick> sparks makes me heppy :)
<chick> I mean HEMPY :p

(notME) i have a 6 week old kitten
(notME) and my 2 year old cat raped him
(notME) shoved his feline penis in his bum
(notME) i watched it
(notME) i wasn't going to spank him
(notME) d00d no
(notME) i turned around
(notME) and he's balls are smacking my kitten in the ass
(notME) i didn't want to spank him
(notME) cuz it'd only get him off faster

Sug*******i8: Darn it, I wanted to nuke some pizza but
someone's using the micro-wave...
loofaspunge: just rub each slice one at a time really fast...

<yaragn> ever seen that movie? The Matrix?
<yaragn> with those green lines of flying text?
<yaragn> *THAT'S* Perl

<gecko^> shit my firewall is flashing like a niggers eyes on
foodstamp day

(jayo) heh, apparently when i was 4 my dad took me to the
pool, i saw a black guy and said "hey dad.. its michael
jackson"

<Loser> i just got an idea
<Loser> i bet noone's done this before
<Loser> get like 100 guys to come into a bottle
<Loser> and then pay a chick to drink it
<AlmtyBob> Loser: um, that's what bukkake is all about
<ryo-ohki> I have videos to prove it.
<ryo-ohki> We're talking like a fucking clear saucer FULL of
spooge
<ryo-ohki> Like, she could pour some cereal on it and still
not have enough cereal to finish the jizz off.

loofaspunge: for(int food = 0; food < worldhunger; food++)
worldhunger--;

(konartist) How do you know when you're REALLY ugly?
(konartist) Dogs hump your leg with their eyes closed.

(snowburnt) teengirl: if you had pre in front of teen i would
soooo talk to you

<DeadPan> i would've challenged knights to fight in a 4 foot
body of water
<DeadPan> then just tried to push em over
<DeadPan> and laugh as they drown
<th15> theyd call you a wuss :)
<DeadPan> so i'd be alive and they wouldnt :)

<maff> 84 of 127 emails...
<|Chris> god damn
<|Chris> aren't you popular
<maff> spamular

<Viscant> hey, i learned a lot from loveline
<Viscant> if a chick has thin white worms coming out of the
tang, don't go down there
<Viscant> thanks dr. drew!
<ceddar> thin white worms means everything is a-ok
<ise> ew thin white worms?
<ise> WTF are those
<ruin-> im wondering the sameeeeeee thing...
<ceddar> my policy is if the girl has anything coming out,
thin white worms, little black worms, tigers, bears, anything
coming out from there, im dropping her off back at her house
<Viscant> oh yeah. and the one about the guy who only wanted
to go down on his girl during "that time of the month"
<Dasrik> the one that i wished i could just reach across the
phone and bitchslap
<Dasrik> like
<Dasrik> "i just sucked a guy off, and i swallowed. can i get
pregnant?"

<|Chris> that geek issues logo looks like you're advertising a
soft rock radio station

(Mutiny) I'm talking to my mom online and she just said "i
could use a good vibrator. i know you dont want to hear that
but a woman has needs"

<th0m> i hate clicking on ad banners
<th0m> because i hear a little like clink of a coin going into
an
asshole's bank account

<Synthrev> Ramen...coke is for pussies
<th0m> no, that's *cock*

<Azzy> "Don't touch me there, yer not my father".....

<AirMonk> I'm still looking for a girl that can get aroused by
the sound
of a hard drive spinning down

<aard> blackrose: you're so goth, you shit bats.

<MadHatter> I did a search for "madhatter efnet" on google and
the first thing I see is:
<MadHatter> <MadHatter> I cut my tongue shaving
<MadHatter> that's great

<BlackDeth> "Disabling this device will cause it to stop
functioning. Is this what you want?"
<BlackDeth> hah
<BlackDeth> stupid

[D1] wait, vinyl players are called turntables too?

<SYch0> heh
* SYch0 has a great family
<SYch0> :D
<Ash> Because they indulge you.
<Ash> But if they keep doing that, you'll grow up fat and
arrogant!
<Ash> Oh, wait.... :(

<notgoth> FUCK DAMN IT
<notgoth> i shot cum in my eye
<notgoth> fuck that burns
<notgoth> i was jerking off
<notgoth> and damn!
<notgoth> ow
<enex> were you jerking off to your dick or something?

<timmo> remember how i told you guys about that chick
<timmo> i was talking to in the record store
<McMoo> the imaginary one?

<homerj> a robot on Futurama
<homerj> "You know why they are using WIndows 3000 as a prison
guard?"
<homerj> because it always locks up

~ iiSII has a bump on the very edge of his eyelid.
(tektrnica) maybe it is a tumour
(letty) or an ingrown toenail

<`Tag> you have a lot of anger from efnet in you
<`Tag> and it shows

<DigDug> internet access to productivity is what condoms are
to babies.
<Ash> A choking hazard?

<SYch0> maybe in your dreams
<SYch0> and youre pretty pathetic if you dream about me
<SYch0> :o
<MadHatter> you cease to exist as soon as I close irc
<SYch0> hah
<SYch0> which is never :|

(pervert_) i wear a shirt that says "I'm gay - it's
contageous"
(pervert_) not cuz im gay
(pervert_) it's so i don't get jacked
(pervert_) wait....that sounds bad

<iMike> monty python would be funny if nerds hadnt invented an
entire subculture devoted to quoting it

<hypr> WE IS TO CUT OFF ALL SUPPLIES OF VODKA TO YOUR
SHITHOUSE COUNTRY

<var> hrmm
<var> how the fuck did a shortcut to e13ay end up on my
desktop
<var> what kinda nefarious shit is windows update pulling
<Guilty> It's your computers way of saying it wants a new
owner
<Guilty> Like a dog scratching on the door to get out

<@Spidey|> http://www.facethejury.com/profile.asp?user_name=
coralshay
<@D1> OMG! MOM?

<BlackDeth> gb: ph33r im gonna be seeing spacegirl in a few
weeks :P
<LkTrout1> Deth is a boner.
<blazemore> lk has a blackdeth.

<MadHatter> sushi rulez!
<Ash> [12:26] <MadHatter> sushi rulez!
<Ash> [12:31] <MadHatter> i have a tummy ache

* MadHatter is back from: Rebooting!
<^enex^> do you feel refreshed

<var> 40 ping dont mean shit if it jerks and stops like a
fucking epileptic in a strobe light