<adam1> my gf supposedly has "issues" with me
<Hiroe> Heh, my ex didn't have just a few issues, she had a
fuckin *Subscription*

<XwinGs> can i find any mensa iq test on the net ?
<Ntruder> part of the test is finding the test.  good luck.
<XwinGs> oic

[ @niffie ] I have no inhabitions right now
[ @aphr0 ] would you finger my asshole?
[ @niffie ] no
[ @aphr0 ] then you have inhibitions

[aphr0] do hospitals let you keep the umbilical cord?
[aphr0] I'ma have my kid's cord made into a die
[aphr0] tie
[aphr0] or freeze it and tan it and make it into a cane
[aphr0] give it to my kid when he learns to walk so he can
walk around and pimp bitches with his umbilical cord

<OneiWilly> ah crap i accidently downloaded winzip again
instead of winamp

<Adamus> I wouldn't care about the bot if you didn't deny me
access to the
channel I that I have been using for this past year
<M[]rgue> meh
<M[]rgue> wasted youth is no concern of mine

<i_am_pi> (pvah) i wonder how funny airport security would
think it would be if you walked into an airport with a
cardboard box that said "BOMB" on it
<i_am_pi> i love QDB./
<i_am_pi> www.geekissues.org/quotes/
<pedXing> i_am_pi: I believe it's a 2 year minimum sentence,
but I'm sure they'd be laughing.
<Kthulu> i doubt they'd find it funny

<neia_doll> Im 5 foot 11 and 116 lbs..i lost 3 on accident..
<k-rad-bob> accident?
<neia_doll> so Im pretty skinny
<k-rad-bob> you got an abortion?

<OreoTZA> ./ignore #k-rad
<OreoTZA> whoa, i wonder if you can actually do that
<OreoTZA> holdon, I'm gonna try
<OreoTZA> ok, hello?
<OreoTZA> HELLo????
<OreoTZA> anyone seen this?
<OreoTZA> LOL!!!!!! IT FUCKING WORKED
<OreoTZA> holy shit
<Dawgyman> josh
<OreoTZA> SHIT I SEE DAWG, it didn't work

<Dr_Pain_> i need help here about a cble modem to nuke theres
a girl who has take my nick and put it on a child porn chan
and im unable to nuke that bitch shes on cable im in winshit

<Beedub> How the fuck do I get into IRC?
<Swigh> You dumb fuck

<SexcBlnde> I want a creamy chicken pizza
<Bart> yeah same! but I want meatlovers
<SexcBlnde> Hmm
<Bart> we could get half and half!
<SexcBlnde> ?? LOL like who will buy the other 2 halves?? ?;)
<Bart> you are joking right?
<SexcBlnde> ??whatttt??

corner (19:08:21): how tall is a standard guillotine?
Andrick (19:08:33): This still concerns you?
corner (19:08:39): yeah, I really want to build one
corner (19:08:47): I have short ceilings
corner (19:08:51): I wanna make sure I can keep it in my apt
Andrick (19:09:00): I have to admit that I never have
committed that number to memory.
Andrick (19:09:06): But I can tell you they are *tall*.
corner (19:09:15): maybe I can make a kid's version?
Andrick (19:09:30): That is probably a wonderfully poor choice
of words.

<Rjx> hmm.....goatse.cx is a better link
<ganonboy> what section of the site are the ROMS in?
<ganonboy> ? is it http://www.goatse.cx
<ganonboy> ??
<Rjx> yup
<ganonboy> I dont see any N64 roms?
<Rjx> what do you see?
<ganonboy> A sick picture...
<Rjx> click on it
<Rjx> it's an imagemap
<Rjx> click on his ass
<ganonboy> you are lying
<Rjx> did you try it?
<ganonboy> yes
<ganonboy> and nothing happens

<Rice_Boy> look at the sys requirements for interdev:
www.free-trial-sex.com
<Rice_Boy> er... http://msdn.microsoft.com/vinterdev/prodinfo/
sysreq.asp
<iheartsql> HAHAHAHAHA
<iheartsql> HAHAHAHAHA
<iheartsql> PRON HEAD
<Rice_Boy> my bad
<Rice_Boy> damn

<hawker> just grab a gun then...
<hawker> end ur misery...
<TomServo> shooting my boss?
<TomServo> good idea

<LilGCube740> are you from a dif country
<|STeReOtYpE|> portugal
<LilGCube740> u speak poor english
<LilGCube740> i speak poor spanish so its all good

<Effyis> oh crap...
<Effyis> i just dropped the dip on the floor
<gleep> Oh, well.  Someone help KarbonCopy back up.
<KarbonCopy> me back up?
<KarbonCopy> what?
<KarbonCopy> HEY!

<Mosh76> TO ANYONE WHO KNOWS, HOW DO YOU STOP PEOPLE FROM
SENDING YOU UNWANTED CHAT MESSAGES PROMOTING THERE PORN SITES?
<Mosh76> Can someone tell me, or atleast tell me where to
look?
<eller> turn off your computer.

<boarsai> funnily enough it took me a few minutes to realise
my pen didn't have "alt + z" capabilities...

<assmongrel> my dick is covered in zits
<xar0> ew...
<assmongrel> no it's a good thing
<assmongrel> i'm ribbed for her pleasure

<@Twitch`> i almost got into a fight at futureshop last night
<@Twitch`> these two guys were talking about NWN, and i said
before they played that they should go on 'thine quest to wash
thy hair'
<@Twitch`> they had long stringy gross oily hair, it almost
made me sick to my stomach
<@Twitch`> they said 'fuck you'
<@Twitch`> then i said 'fuck you'
<@Twitch`> then this store guy asked me to go look at stuff
somewhere else
<@Path`> haha

<SkoL> mofo must be drunk
<Tweedle> |OUF|mofo: you getting AMD?
<|OUF|mofo> no
<Tweedle> yeah he's drunk

<fm> i've had three girls today IM me and tell me that they
like me.
<fm> then they said april fools and signed off.

<Dayv> Eric, you wouldn't know bad taste if it came up behind
you and licked your asshole with your mother's severed tongue.

<Merrick> Elizabethian: To be or not to be, that is the
question, whether tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings
and arrows of outrageous fortune, or to take up arms against a
sea of troubles and by opposing end them. Ebonics: I be fixin
to hang in the hood.

<DireWolf> My life'd be a whole lot cooler if Vikings invaded
every once in a while.

<Carter> How did you guys used to think babies were made?
<Carter> I thought it was about urine!
<Carter> I thought you had to mix urine, so I peed in this
bucket and I tried to get my brother to do the same so that I
could have a baby in the bucket

<JallakWriting> "mammario-fetishistic" is a memorably stupid
sounding phrase. How about "tit-happy"?

<Koushiro> ... you know your computer's screwed up when IE
freezes and then displays an error message: "Error. Unable to
access error.dll".

<Red_Green> Dar wants me.
<Daroneasa> to die.

Jallak went to Hebrew school at this one temple for
years...there was no rabbi, the head of the temple was the
Cantor. He had long hair and he sang a lot. He would always
give us long sermons about judiasm and goodness and all that,
getting very very very passionate, his voice rising, tears
nearly coming to his eyes as he spoke of God aa a "Great
cosmic teddy bear"...
<Jallak> It's been years since I went to Hebrew school...today
I found out the Cantor had been arrested...for running a
prostitution ring

<usagi> "As for religion and science, I'm placing a
restraining order, Religion must stay 500 feet from Science at
all times."

<Jammer> Bad things happen in threes, don't they?
<Fake_Plastic_Tree> like Hanson.

<Jallak> Now, see, what you've done is just given me this
mental image of this prepubescent girl dressed as a boy on
stage, addressing the audience and telling them "Tinkerbell
thinks she might become well again if little children
believed  in sex"

<teknoho> im not drinking hard liquor for a lil while. i gave
it up for lent.
<mmmichael> what does lent do to you?
<mmmichael> does it fuck you up?

<NCHRIST> advice - while putting ascreen in a pipe do not stab
yourself in the
fucking finger and cut it and then flail your hand
around with the
screen still stuck in it, losing the screen

<Farnarcle> I think the last place I would like to be beamed
is 'Up scotty'.

<sneak> amazon.com are such pieces of shit
<hellgrrl> what is amazon?
<hellgrrl> travel?

<Wilke> LEMME SHOW YOU MY FORECAST
<Wilke> COLD WITH LOTS OF FUCKING SNOW AND LIGHTNING
<Wilke> LOW OF REALLY FUCKING COLD
<Wilke> HIGH OF REALLY NOT QUITE AS FUCKING COLD

<eltawater> anyone know the name of a (mathematical) function
which calculates how many times a number M fits into a number
N?
<eltawater> i.e. 20,4 = 5
<eltawater> ?
<Biddle> Division?
<AlleyCat> divisor
<eltawater> er
<eltawater> *smacks head into desk*

<JohnnyCat> the phantasm movies are good too. along the same
thread of weird electronic
horror movie shit, a movie called cube is awesome
<JohnnyCat> http://us.imdb.com/Title?0123755
<JohnnyCat> very unique
<Somni> is that the one with the new Dax from DS9, and the
robot cop from that Tek show
(by William Shatner)?
<JohnnyCat> i'm not sure.. i don't think so. it's about these
people that get stuck in
the middle of this maze of cubes with doors on
each face of the cube.  they
have to figure out whether it's safe to move from
cube to cube, or they get
diced up
<Somni> yep, that's the one
<q[Simon]> That sounds like my office.

<sneak> do you use gnutella?
<satman> no i use mirc

<ArtyMorty> we kill all the jehovah's witnesses once and for
all, either we get some
peace and quiet or we get hit by lightning from a clear sky

<tress> black people don't bother me so long as they are in
jail

<Mr_Saturn> im surprised you won the race with 3 million other
sperm <VenDi> i never raced in anythin dumbass

(01/21/02) 11:41PM<MrDev-> christ, they should put a nice
warning when you log into a solaris box that killall on linux
and solaris are entirely different commands

(Kawmun_Sentz): Tip of the day: Your daily fudgesicles intake
should be less than 7

<g_smackchik> did you know that it is anatomically impossible
to lick your elbow...and 75% of the people who hear that
actually try to lick their elbow?
<cochese_04> I've got the statistics in on how much I give a
shit...the numbers are dangerously low!

<RaptorII> Screwing with people's minds is my ultimate
pasttime however.
<Supe> Or is it?!