<Grim> <chikster> fuck a pole
<Grim> *** [#geekissues] No users matching *.pl found on
channel.

<@pr3x3l> my sister goes to emory
<@Blaxthos> is she hot ?
<@pr3x3l> we think she's a lesbian dude
<@Blaxthos> what's her number ?
<@Blaxthos> i'll finalize the decision for her

<MiDGeT`> so its just irony i guess
<MiDGeT`> but cooler
<BrettyBoy> i hate ironing

<TexacoForKids> you need a good pickup line.. like "so you
putting out
or what?"

<hasek30> see i put <embed src="WishYouWereHere.mid" autoplay=
"true" loop="false" width="400" height="100">
<X13> Is the file named WishYouWereHere.mid?
<hasek30> nah its not

[topic@#perth(DALNET)]: Hey, blackmarket drugs aren't all bad.
Hell, they've been teaching kids the metric system since 1954!

<pork> all the chicks here are either really ugly, lesbian, or
men
<CardCheat> some are all three, pork
<Shovelbearer> uglesbimen

<dodee> you want hard, ask glc to send you some of his
grannies in nipple clamps shitting on japanese girls that are
eating vomit while haveing 50 guys nut on them
<CreePy> dodee: I have that one, it sucked.  The one with
vultures eating the girl's liver while a leopard raped her was
cool tho.
<dodee> jesus christ

dodee: I look british.
dodee: I think it's the haircut.
[jhk]: it's probably the teeth

<CreeDC> rsw: is the neice cute?
<rswAFK> it's not born yet.
<Dodee> that's young, even for matt.
<rswAFK> she's underage, anyway.
<CreeDC> rsw: but it's a girl for sure right?

<Squiggle> When I grow up, I wanna be arrested for
masturbating in front of a daycare.

dodee: yall need hobbies. =)
CreeeD: says IRC boy.

CreeDi: I made a joke to this chick about how she was grumpy
because she was
beaten a lot as a child, and it turns out she really was.
CreeDi: I felt about as big as a keebler elf testicle.

<shithead1> it appears my computer just deleted all the
cookies.
<JustNoodle> now, all you have to do is rename it "cookie
monster"

*** Joins: Becky (~ral919@RisaNet-5356.dialip.mich.net)
*** ChanServ sets mode: +o Becky
(@Coffee): [Becky] Hmm..your cute.

<Jedi-Ohki> yah, and im a newbie because i've been a. using
mirc since...1998 b. been using the internet since...1995, or
c. all of the above.

<Jim> WOAH, HUGE STORY FROM FOX NEWS
<Jim> KIDS WHO DRINK ARE MORE LIKELY TO HAVE SEX
<Frinky> WOW
<Frinky> I never would have guessed that
<Swimguy37> no kiddin
<Jim> It's almost as shocking as their "there are perverts on
the internet" story

<Wilfred> Do you think I could kick your mom's ass Justin?
<Wilfred> And remember...I've had weapons training.
<Michael> Masturbating in the closet doesn't count as "Weapons
training" in Canada. No matter how thin and pointy it is.
<Wilfred> It's very thin and pointy.

<Boogaleeboo> I'm sorry your budget only allows for 5 dollars
to spend on hookers
<Boogaleeboo> And I'm sorry your ugliness only allows sex with
hookers
<Joe_> How much does yours allow, Boog?
<Boogaleeboo> Silly
<Boogaleeboo> You don't PAY
<Joe_> Ah, the confessions of a Boston rapist.
<Boogaleeboo> It's not rape if you kill them first
<Joe_> Touche

<D4NG3R0U5> one time, in my science class, i had this dream...
<daenonok> dude you slept in class?
<D4NG3R0U5> in which my girlfriend (who sat a few seats away)
got up, and, on her way over to me took off her top, then got
on her knees and unzipped my pants
<D4NG3R0U5> yeah i slept in class, sometimes (when i decided
it was time for my medication)
<D4NG3R0U5> and, bc the night before she gave me head irl, the
dream was really vivid...woke up, everyone was lookin at me...
<D4NG3R0U5> then the teacher went back on talkin, and everyone
turned back around...that haunts me

<Threeboy> i think advertising other channels is like bay
employees going into sears and shouting "HUDSON BAY COMPANY
NEEDS MORE CUSTOMERS"

* Amuck50 designs some magic items for a D&D campaign
<Amuck50> heheh Arrows of Nuking.....
<Kyle> Cock ring of glory.
<Amuck50> cock ring of +2 protection

<ATAD> I saw a girl that has a pikachu umbrella
<ATAD> it's all yellow, has pikachu's face on it, and 2
pikachu ears sticking off the top
<Wagoo> Was she seckzy?
<ATAD> iono
<ATAD> I was looking at the pikachu umbrella more
<Wagoo> "Hello my dear, that's an awfully attractive pikachu
umberella you have there, maybe you'd like to come back to my
dorm room to discuss it's forms, themes, and concept."

@|C|REDS`: I want a fuckin gf
@|C|Nemur: you want a girlfriend or a geforce? plz be specific

<mentality> THE WORLD IS GOING TO END
<darkLem> and it's coming in all caps.
<mentality> WE ARE ALL GONNA DIE

<eX|NYC> wtf my mom tells this lady to come over then she
leaves 10 secs b4 she comes so im stuck here with this lady
like uhh dude i dont know wtf she went leave me alone let me
play my computer games >_<
<PJ> its called a baby sitter.

<Olan> I haven't been in her for a while...
<nukem> i'm sorry to hear that

([Locutus]) wait a minute..here we have its in my enbglsi
dictionary.." Scrimp, 'prawn "
([Locutus]) know it now?
(@Wagoo) yaw
(@Wagoo) I look at prawn on the net all the time
(@Wagoo) I hate when they ask for your credit card details
though :/

<Azrel> that was a pain in the ass
<AnalBoy24m> I know the feeling.

<KuWaItdog> I can get rid of the ban with my defence extrem
ban programme.
<KuWaItdog> I have an american friend he have been in mirc
network for 15 years I'm not lying I can tell to give you
something I dont know what it is but it is a virus [strong
virus]that you cant put ignore or cancel the virus will get in
your computer before you know it so what you think scared?

* mike rolls eyes WITH SEXY RESULTS
<RushMore> you got porn behind eyeballs?
<mike> yes
<RushMore> lucky cunt
<RushMore> mine is on the bottom of my foot
<RushMore> which is relly ackward for masturbation

* Re-monkey (re-monkey@cdm-208-52-188-lkch.cox-internet.com)
has joined #geekissues
<Re-monkey> Wow
<Re-monkey> It's all the people I've been laughing at.
<Re-monkey> I love reading QDB.
<Re-monkey> This is almost like seeing all the great celebs in
one place.
<Re-monkey> But, not quite.

<@rudesmurf> my mom got me "real brewed" iced tea
<@rudesmurf> it tastes like cold tea
<@pikacheney> iced tea is cold tea...

<Drizuid> what operating system does linux run on?

<ReWom> IRC is full of sexy and beautiful people, they just
send you the wrong pictures.

<MoLsOnGiRL> hehe ive been just laughing my ass off here the
past half hour
<Owyn> I think we figured as much.
<Owyn> Giggly? Now you have the "munchies"?
<Owyn> Or are you starting to "burn out"
<MoLsOnGiRL> hey hey
* Owyn runs out of pot slang

<Guilty> <v-ger> i like masturbating with a jar of peanut
butter and leaving the big cylindrical hole in it so the next
person has a REALLY good idea what i did
<Guilty> Approve Kill Nothing
<logik_> kill
<Mdar> kill
<gfjgfjgfj> what does nothing do?
<Mdar> is that a rhetorical question?

<Phuser> Last night the power went out. Good thing my camera
had a flash...I took 65 pictures of myself making a
sandwich...My neighbors thought it was lightning in my house,
so they called the cops.

<nastsm0m> jakob do me a favor?
<nastsm0m> never get married
<nastsm0m> never breed
<nastsm0m> in fact don't even date
<Greylark> don't ever leave your room
<nastsm0m> yeah that either
<jakob> you just described my life... :(

Nastard> i think i just found an avi of shania twain sucking
some guy off
<matt> that don't impress me much

<DoomLord9> heh. reminds me of the other day. my mom walked up
to me with a pair of panties and says "i found these in your
room. care to explain" i was like "......no, i can't explain
that, but thank you for the hope that women come into my room
and strip when i'm not there. you have made my day happy"
<DoomLord9> unfortunetly, they were just my sisters she had
just taken out of the wash. i was kinda bummed about that

<Chaos[X]> Overclocking can screw everything up.
<Chaos[X]> I've seen it break up marriages.

<misogynic> Senor: tell me, is your mother still attractive?
<SenorWeird> for someone her age, I'd say so.
<misogynic> Can I have her number?
<SenorWeird> (305)867-5309
<misogynic> :D!
<misogynic> What's her name?
<SenorWeird> Jenny
<misogynic> Is that her honest number?

<@Pumiliocumfustis> these speakers have so much bass
<@qrg> how do they fit fish in such small boxes

<SC__AT> 3. What united states president was in office during
the civil war?
<SC__AT> Times up! The answer was: forty three

<finneas> the only good thing tom green has been in is drew
berrymore

<lasereyes> im looking at that dazzle mpeg2.. but its like 350
bucks
<finneas> can you put a price on quality piracy?

<tima> k, i'm starving
<rocky> fooooooood
<OlDirtyB> im starving too
<EConc_> god, since when did #nerdz become ethiopia?

<Logik-> ymir wants to hire a personal assassin to kill me
<Logik-> <---- has land mines in his yard
<tra__> what happens when the grass cutter comes to clip the
lawn?
<Logik-> tra__, they're not allowed to mow certain spots :P
<tra__> so the hitman just treads through the mowed spots,
since its easier to walk there anyway?

<acetylcholine> if it's 2 things i hate it's racial profiling
and arabs on my airplane