<Farrod> One Saturday afternoon, I was sitting in my lawn chair, drinking beer and watching my wife mow the lawn. The neighbor lady from across the street was so outraged at this that she came over and shouted at me, "You should be hung." <Farrod> I calmly replied, "I am. That's why she cuts the grass.
<TC> I have a very bad fear of unknown places <Nastard> like the congo, or the african deserts, or a vagina... <TC> I dont fear African Deserts
<pleb> hey how long does it take to get back the results from a fertility test? <Ouroboros> Do you have a girlfriend? <pleb> yeah <Ouroboros> 9 months.
<Aniki> WOW i just found a hidden porn folder on my hdd <Aniki> brb <Cyber_Akuma> ........... <Cyber_Akuma> aniki found the temporary internet files folder
<RaZ> I should burn my windows ME CD <Thrawn> no piracy <RaZ> I mean BURN it
<tester> what did I miss? <maklic> well <maklic> i was just fucking AdrameleK's momma <maklic> other than that nothing much <tester> send the log
<%pain> let's do some al quida jokes. anyone? /: < baggy> well has anyone ever noticed that The War Against Terrorism is never abbreviated as TWAT ?
<Meridian> fucking <Meridian> best thing about ramen noodles <Meridian> my girlfriend did NOT know what they were <Meridian> so i was making some <rohan> rofl <Meridian> and i put the flavouring packet thing on the sink <Meridian> and she sees the packet <Meridian> and what SHE sees <Meridian> is a little condom shaped wrapper <Meridian> saying "beef flavour"
(oddmud): oh great, here comes another idiot (@tekzil): afraid of a little competition?
<_kd> msn is the closest thing to parking a white van outside a school yard
<Dejer> anyone know where the hell Femunda cheese comes from <InCDeathmeister> Femunda these nuts
<blake> they used to play this game called pheonix *** Satan-\\\ has joined #doctors <blake> where they dress up like orcs and shit *** ChanServ sets mode: +v Satan-\\\ <stx-tyler> these people at college last yr always played magic....they were like total fags *** Murder|away| is now known as LoD|MurdeR <blake> and run around in the woods <stx-tyler> i think they were seriouslly homo :/ <blake> and hit each other with styrofoam swords *** [WS]n00b is now known as [WS]Arutha-Drinking <stx-tyler> AND THROW BALLS AND YELL "LIGHTNING BOLT" <^TV^SinSemilla> lol
essiah00Guy: I can't stand your fuckery. jass10816: lol jass10816: my mom is standing right behind me jass10816: good one Messiah00Guy: THE DRUGS YOU ORDERED Messiah00Guy: ARE ON THEIR WAY Messiah00Guy: GG jass10816: im going to get you Messiah00Guy: From behind?
<@*****> :( i suck * @SpeedyPhoenix zips up <@SpeedyPhoenix> why the sad face? it was good.
<DarkSkeye> my mouse died :-( <casmill2> you gonna bury it in the backyard?
Feyd-Rautha: So when are you getting cable anyways? Hsu: soon Feyd-Rautha: I can taste the broadband Hsu: taste like victory Feyd-Rautha: But a word of advice: don't put your lips on a live cable wire.
<tethfs> you're a bit dim, arent you? <Hazza|1942> dim? <tethfs> evidently so.
<CreepingDeath> what was that other guy <CreepingDeath> during WWII <CreepingDeath> he was in charge of the concentration camps <CreepingDeath> argh can't remember his name <Malek> colonel klink?
<SkycreatoR_> SkycreatoR_ Loves to suck every chinese boys dick! <SkycreatoR_> Eh uh .. <SkycreatoR_> Squirly Loves to suck every chinese boys dick!
<kng^hem> jävla kattkräken satt å käka på min inplastade baguette ja just köpt.. <kng^hem> dom fick straffsitta på kökslampan ett tag :P <Robbat> hahah <kng^hem> faans jävla okynnes feta små as ibland <orion> ï dønt kñõw wëèdï h
<Godsey> there is a problem w/ our house :) <Godsey> there is a small cosmetic call next to the toilet <Godsey> and I'm afraid my fat ass won't fit :) <Godsey> so I'm taking the wall out <etrigan> with your ass?
<ThundR> does this irc client make my butt look big?
<Neural> I learned who I was while sitting in county lockup for soliciting underage girl runaways into taking nude photos for their hollywood actress portfolio. <Neural> you'd be surprise how many show up at the L.A. bus terminal everyday. <Neural> at first I was there for the 2600 meets....then it was for the teeny runaways.
<storm_> http://www.cnn.com/2000/NATURE/01/13/monkey.cloning/ index.html <storm_> they clone them and send them on to irc
<etrigan> im gonna take that fricking printer and stick it up your asshole, and then print out gay pron on it. fricking h0m0.
<meenk> and when you get to the point <meenk> fold it up and tuck it? <ophie> +-----------------* <ophie> | roll with this |\_ when you get to the flap <ophie> | flap ---> | \_ tuck this little pointed <ophie> | to the outside | \_ end into the flap <ophie> | | \_ <ophie> +-----------------+---------* <etr1gan> how odd, an ascii diagram for rolling a dollar for snorting
<sin|away> wanna see a turtle ride a slug? <sin|away> compile a vb program in wine
<etr1gan> you know your drunk when irc gives you motion sickness.
<twink-E> man i've tried PCP, LSD, DMT, and THC, but nothing beats IRC!
<ginger> my summer was alright i guess, went to the beach and met a couple guys blah hehe <ginger> still a virgin
<neocakko> playing in a pile of leaves is more fun than sex. <neocakko> because leaves don't say "you really suck at this." <syke> a pile of leaves won't nickname you "scrape & wash" afterwards either
<spritegoddess> I poked myself in the eye <spritegoddess> while feeding myself cheetos. <spritegoddess> I suck at life.
<spacegirl> because i don't suck dick <P-Rex> how do your mates keep you from talking during sex then, kellie?
<sdr> SHE MAKES MY DILL GO KOSHER BABY
<entropy> goin to get my tatt touched up here in about 10 min <j0shua> what kind of tatt? <entropy> 'entropy' on my back in apple ][e chars
<Porridge> after the prom... we went to stay at this girls house... they had an assload of good CDs and CD-Rs and a burner <bmk> you went to a girls house after prom..... and you were thinking about burning cd's?
<punkgrl> have you had anal sex? <Pr1ncess> hahaheoah <Pr1ncess> no <Pr1ncess> have u had anal sex punkgrl? <punkgrl> hahah nah :) im a wimp.. that would hurt too much.. it would be like taking one of those poops that hurts your butthole real badly cuz it stretches it apart.. yeee-owie <Pr1ncess> i think it would be worse then taking a big shit
<Pr1ncess> oh sick i just sneezed and blood shot out of my crotch <etrigan> that time again?? <Pr1ncess> hahaha <Pr1ncess> yes <Pr1ncess> that was a pretty fucking sick thing to say wasnt it? <etrigan> hell yes
<napster> if you have issues w/ him, take them up in msg <bill^> no prob <bill^> actually, when he comes back to NJ I will take it up with him with a baseball bat.... <napster> why is that? <bill^> it is much more effective.
<athena-> I'm not a jew, but I have been known to make some boys men at age 13 *wink*
<zugz> I can't stand people that preach, "Only God can judge" and yet simultaneously ridicule others for adultery, etc <zugz> I don't know about what they believe, but my God wants me to get some.
Frosterfree: I will tell you what my hell is, you guys probably don't read enough to know what ADD is do you Frosterfree: Attention Defecit Disorder Frosterfree: it's a learning disability Frosterfree: discovered extensivly in 1980 Frosterfree: a year before I was born Frosterfree: I have had to fight that my entire fuck'n life Frosterfree: my kids will have to fight it for their entire lives CatGonk: You won't have kids. Trust me on this.
Kiyomi_Shinfuji: CaptKirby: ne1 that uses drugs Kiyomi_Shinfuji: CaptKirby: is stupider than LP for fucking men LavosPhoenix: what's wrong with knowing your place? LavosPhoenix: and it isn't men... LavosPhoenix: since my friend and I are under 18 Kiyomi_Shinfuji: minors buttfucking just makes it SO MUCH BETTER then, doesn't it, LP? LavosPhoenix: well... we don't do anal secks much anyway...
<N715DP> yeah, no kidding <N715DP> me - actually buying a MS OS <N715DP> hell hath frozen over <eggs_> guess I need to go find Jesus
<Hammy> my forehead is flakey <Nastard> must be peeling from sunburn <Nastard> did you open a window recently?
<Faldarith> I should give you some information on my school, our black population <Faldarith> is named Andre
<mrphilez> how many inches is 69mm? <GLHTurbo> let me measure my penis <Avram> how would that help? you have a 69mm penis? <GLHTurbo> yes <_neil> 69mm = 6.9cm = 2.71" <GLHTurbo> yes i do <GLHTurbo> oh wait
<FJ> you know what the coolest thing about IRC is? <ashendragon> what <FJ> you can talk with your mouth full and still be understood
[@Kamagurka] (akino): if you are no freak, what are you then? you already admitted to being a goth, you know... [+akino] i know. but i am not a freak. [+akino] i am from mars
<D4NG3R0U5> why is it, in the commercials the bottles of medicine stop talking when the actor picks them up? <D4NG3R0U5> usually when i pick up my med bottles they keep talkin "2 a day? what are you, a pussy! take 6!" "it says don't drink alcohol after taking me...you gonna let them tell you what to do?"