<[N]> if a chick just comes over gives u head and leaves
<[N]> it just rules
<[N]> for lazy ppl
<[N]> u could even irc while getting the job done
<WTM2K> would that be like road head?
<[N]> hahah
<WTM2K> irc head... geek version of road head

<krakerman> i had a pimple on my pen0s te other day. i had to
get a boner so i could pop it.

<evilroot> "One World, One Web, One Program" - Microsoft
Promotional Ad
<evilroot> "Ein Volk, Ein Reich, Ein Fuhrer" - Adolf Hitler
<Madiarin> evilroot: That's horrible.
<|-Shin-|> Is it a TV ad or a banner or what?
<Beanoo> erk .. bill 'adolf' gates
<evilroot> |-Shin-|:  not sure
<|-Shin-|> aw.
* |-Shin-| was hoping to get a link out of it
<evilroot> One World. One Web. One Program.
<evilroot> Microsoft advertisement, 1997
<dafatdude> thats M$ in a nutshell
<|-Shin-|> Heh, looks like you're not the only one to have
that opinion. I just did a google search on it
* Madiarin was searching altavista in the futile attempt to
see if anyone could verify the MS part of the quote.

<gadget73> Oracle gave out bobble head dolls of thier CEO to
thier employees for Christmas
<gadget73> i want one, as well as a Richard Stallman and Bill
Gates one, then I could have mock discussions about shit

irc.aol.com Message of the Day - 
irc.aol.com (If you packet us, we will send you a bunch of
cd's)

<AGodlyHeretic> and i installed enough security equipment on
my computer, that even i think i might have gone overboard
<smokedbrown> lol
<AGodlyHeretic> no seriously, it records every keystroke i
make and is totally hidden. can only be DETECTED with my
password, and requires a second password to open it. it also
is designed to take screenshots everyso often when a specific
strings is typed
<smokedbrown> Dude.
<smokedbrown> um.
<smokedbrown> the white people of waco called. they want thier
paranoia back

* SonRyoga is now known as SR[phone-with-hat-girl]
* SR[phone-with-hat-girl] is now known as SR
[phone-with-hot-girl]
* DJ-Freedom is now known as freedom|sexwithhand

* StorDuff has joined #suicide
<StorDuff> YOU ARE ALL USELESS
<ManInMoon> tell me something I didn't know already

Dr SpaZZo: http://members.tripod.com/tempestgames/razor.jpg
Syphit: lol, who uses your razor?
Dr SpaZZo: My sister keeps fucking taking them
Dr SpaZZo: Theres like, 3 of mine in the shower...
Syphit: lol, how old is your sister?
Dr SpaZZo: 20.
Dr SpaZZo: Youd think she'd be competent to get her own damned
razors, wouldnt you.
Syphit: yeah
Dr SpaZZo: WELL SHE ISNT

<Vulpes> I know somewhere out there is a man or woman willing
to have sex with me while I remain on IRC.

<Crack[H]eaD> That brings up an interesting point....
According to the license agreement of some software you dont
own it... you are merely renting it
<Crack[H]eaD> so by downloading the software am I borrowing
it?
<Lasuuco> yeah crack
<Lasuuco> hence the term
<Lasuuco> "licensed"
<Crack[H]eaD> I should make a bunch of bumper stickers that
say "Borrowing is not a crime" ;)
<bigfoot> could i borrow one?
<Crack[H]eaD> Fuck yeah

<hobojackson> i was walking around and saw a car going really
fast
<hobojackson> SO I SAID WOW THAT CAR MUST HAVE 1024 MB OF DDR
SD RAM AND A 256 MEG VIDEO CARD AND A 3 GIGAHERTZ HARD DRIVE
AHAHHA AH AHAA AHAHAHHA
<spongebob> OMG YOU CONFUSED COMPUTERS WITH REAL LIFE
<spongebob> THATS THE FUNNIEST THING I EVER HEARd!!!!!!!!!

Iride4mosh » no doing gay stuff while im gone ya hear
polkaisrad » dont wanna miss out huh?
Iride4mosh » shut up man...

* ZoMbIeGuY has joined #finalfight
<Xerox> It's a zombie! Aim for the head, guys!
<ZoMbIeGuY> =(
* ToastyGhost knocks ZoMbIeGuY unconscious
<Nimduin> ...Wow, he's either AzN or StUpId.
<ToastyGhost> Just an AOL'r
<ZoMbIeGuY> Uhh... I'm outter here.
<ZoMbIeGuY> goodbye.
* ToastyGhost cheers
<Nimduin> That, or he's Fake President Deling.
<TedAran> Ha
* ZoMbIeGuY has quit IRC (Quit: )

<Anthony> identical twins?
<sHyGuY> tis true.
<Kagome> we're faternal
<Kagome> thank GOD
<Anthony> FATernal?

<woops> people without porn invent stuff like computers or
solve world hunger

<Andaru> I don't have any porno
<Andaru> I don't particularly like porno either
<LuCiPh33R> you're on the internet and you don't like porn?

<Boned> ever watched scrambled porn only to learn 5 mins later
that its two guys?

<Renegade|> ops please
<Renegade|> why won't the bots remember that i have ops
<MatzeRX> u like keep changing ur IP or summit ?
<Renegade|> no
<MatzeRX> cable or dial up?
<Renegade|> dial up

<[Ars]Michael> is there any way to make a noise when u get a
pm
<[Ars]Mikoyan> you could grunt in pleasure

<Sentenced4Life> Im from ohio..w00t w00r
<int0x6h> that would explain the handle right?

<Ultra_Violet> Xero: I want to fuck your lesbian grand-mother
with a dirty wooden spoon

<SonicBlues> man, don't shove vibrators up your ass if your a
guy man. I was trying to milk my prostate y'know, damnit, I
guess the vibrator was too much for me.
<SonicBlues> get this, i slide the dildo up my but, smothered
with ky jelly yeah? I flip it on, and I start stroking.
<DrQ> this cant end up well....
<SonicBlues> now, i'm in front of a TV, about 3.5 meters away
from me, compensate about .25 meters for the diagonal. But
man, i start strokng, and maybe 8 minutes later, i get this
surging pain from my nuts and i shoot the silver bullet all
the way to the tv man. christ.
<DrQ> conrgatulations
<Thrifty> Hahahahah holy shit man
<SonicBlues> yeah, the problem is, I came onto irc to tell you
all, my girlfriend stepped in...

[BR00D] haha i gave up on irc, and came back just to harass
you :D

<Morstis> The oath of celibacy in the church only means the
priest can secretly sodomize young boys instead of having open
intercourse with women.

<freshbob> man, this banana is huge
<freshbob> i don't think bananas this big are natural
<freshbob> they must be genetically engineered or something
<manna> dude, it's not natural, but you have to give your ass
a chance to relax

<Jeeeeebus> eg: I was in a doorway with my arm across it
resting .. and he walks thru and goes "minimize, please"
without even thinking bout it..
<RnRcneHHlt> hahahahahahahahahahaha
<Jeeeeebus> I wish I could do that..

<IAmKingBrad> you know, having an opera singer rape you is
much like eating a biscuit, except with eating a biscuit you
do not have a cock in your ass unless you live at my uncle's
house and am my cousin HAHA

<@freshmint> [22:44] Amber: but shooosh I didnt tell u that
<@freshmint> [22:44] Amber: hehe ok?
<@freshmint> oops.
<Spudsta> this, coming from the chick with a metaphorical cock

[+Sirex]: ...busy moving from gentoo to debian :)
[Si|verwire]: gentoo, debian? eh? where do u live then

[+Sirex]: ...busy moving from gentoo to debian :)
[{Ogre}Si|verwire]: gentoo, debian? eh? where do u live then

<merle> damn it, i cant figure out what is taking up so much
room on my hdd
<scott-> probably gay porn you renamed and hid a long time ago

<Kasugai> matthias_: You could get a job at Google telling
their tech dept. what they are doing wrong!
<matthias_> for one they still haven't got a mind-reader
interface going
<Kasugai> I hear they are still trying to implement safe
search filtering on that one
<Kasugai> Otherwise you get pr0n popping up every 8 seconds.

<Pepe> there are 2 kids in the fourth grade, one white and one
black, which one has the bigger dick
<L@cky> the black one
<Pepe> why?
<L@cky> cuz hes black dipshit
<Pepe> no fuckface, the nigger's 25!
<Nostradom> Dude, stop making fun of black people.
<Nostradom> Seriously, I used to have a really good black
friend.
<L@cky> used to?
<Nostradom> money was short...we had to sell him

<LLyric> How do I break out of an infinite loop on a c64? It's
been sooo long.
<MaggieL> Unplug it.

<thezinner> I've yet to find a women with the right MD5sum :)

<vocalizedWHORE> mmm, c++
<vocalizedWHORE> do.this();
<vocalizedWHORE> do.that();
<vocalizedWHORE> if (error)
<vocalizedWHORE> blame(microsoft);

<Perma> The first time you ever meet a chick, you have to slap
her, just back hand the girl as hard as you can, like that,
you'll never worry about that chick telling you "You never
treat me the was you used too".
<Perma> Got that?
<rob> what if she likes getting smacked around
<Perma> Even better

Session Start: Thu Dec 12 21:34:30 2002
<burzzzzzz> 23:56:55
<burzzzzzz> 3 more mins !! :D
<cystum> till what?
<burzzzzzz> i can drive on my own
<burzzzzzz> 00:00:01
<burzzzzzz> !!!!
<milolilo> you're free!
<burzzzzzz> <-- officialy a driver !! :D
Session Start: Sat Dec 14 19:38:29 2002
<burzzzzzz> i had a little disagreement with cement pilar
while looking for a place to park my car :/

<Rav3n> my gf is only 2 years old and my parents are fuming.
<Rav3n> older

(During another round of mega splits on DALnet)
<Guest51394> how do u get into the servers?
<priz> you can't.
<priz> if you walked into a McDonalds when the kitchen was on
fire, do you think they'd take your order?

[Video`] The future of tech support isn't changing at all.
[Video`] I was in this class of tech support people.
[Video`] I took a screenshot of the desktop
[Video`] Made it the background
[Video`] And moved all the icons
[Video`] And they were confused as hell :

<pairo> you know you're doomed when you have to whois your
domain registrar ID to find out your own phone number

<bbraun> do you think that when thoreau urged us to simplify
our lives, he meant going to serial terminals?

<Oriden> you have lens crafters in canada?
<EV3> yup yup
<Gregg|WaitingForUO> no
<Gregg|WaitingForUO> we just leave our visually impaired to
die.
<Gregg|WaitingForUO> get hit by cars and stuff

<gofer-chan> ...Exo, can I still keep my channel? Or is that
like impersonating you or something?
<gofer-chan> Because if you want, I'll change the name.
<Exophase> gofer; You can keep the channel :p
<gofer-chan> Yay!
<Exophase> gofer; It's not impersonating me to have a channel
called "#exophase", because no one is gonna walk into the
channel and go "gasp, I'm sitting inside Exophase!"

<Ken> Massages are pretty healthy for you.
<Ken> It's a form of preventive medicine
<KageGamer> what about the massages that like the little
japanese girl walks on your back
<KageGamer> what if she has long nails on her toes
<KageGamer> wouldnt that hurt?
DannoHung> In mother russia, YOU walk on little Japanese girl!

<zealous> I was walking to the mobil gas station this morning
to get my ride to work as I do every morning (weekdays anyway)
when I decided that instead of walking the long way around I
would just jump the little wall (about 3 feet high) and get
there quicker, well when I went to jump the wall I started off
with my left foot instead of my right like I usually do and I
didn't bring my foot up quick enough thus catching the wall
and sending me face first
<zealous> into the ground but somehow I managed to do some
wild ninja tuck and roll things ending up on my feet and
staring at some guy who was quite bugged eyed so I just raised
my arms in a "v" and yelled hazah at the top of my lungs

lope767: watch out man
lope767: she'll eat u hole
lope767: err
lope767: whole
FKing Windows: I was sort of hoping for both.

* DRagon87 flips quarter
<DRagon87> heads
<Squirl> is heads the bottom?