* gg (Mibbit@205.204.48.221) has joined #Terraria
              <gg> I just cut my hand with a knife while slicing a hotdog.
              <@Sqozza> Awesome.
              <gg> It happened because the phone rang. When I answered it,
              it was this clown I know named Steve.
              <gg> He told me he had been to a graveyard and seen my name on
              six gravestones.
              <gg> When I hung up the phone, I was surprised to notice my
              hand dripping blood faster than I'd anticipated from such a
              small wound.
              <gg> Concerned, I bandaged the hand with a paper napkin, but
              realized there was butter on the napkin, and the butter had
              salt in it.
              <gg> So, with a stinging hand, I ran cold water over the hand
              but the butter made the water slough off.
              <gg> Then the doorbell rang.
              <gg> I answered it. It was Steve again. He was holding a
              package for me and standing at a strange angle.
              <gg> I took the package and slammed the door.
              <gg> Opening the package, I noticed two things. 1) The package
              was unaddressed, and 2) my hand was still bleeding.
              <@Sqozza> 3) Steve is awesome.
              <gg> I ripped the package open and inside were five rusted
              nails and a jack rabbit's head.
              <gg> I called Steve back, but he didn't answer.
              <gg> Confused and bleeding, I tossed the box into the trash
              and sat back down on the couch to finish Dr. Who.
              <TheBadShepperd> I knew this was going to end bad when you
              said you knew a clown.
              <@Sqozza> Clowns these days
              <gg> But the episode was strange. It was about to short people
              fighting over a rotten piece of meat.
              <gg> The Dr. was nowhere to be seen.
              <gg> I got out a T.V. Guide to see if I was mistaken about
              what I'd TiVo'd.
              <@Sqozza> gg, maybe you were watching Jersey Shore instead
              <gg> I wasn't. It was, indeed, Dr. Who. At least according to
              T.V. Guide.
              <gg> I put the remote down and noticed that my hand was still
              bleeding.
              <gg> Then I ate my hotdog.
              <gg> Slowly.
              * gg (Mibbit@205.204.48.221) has left #Terraria
              <@Sqozza> What the fuck just happened